Cooking for my Child

[glad_2beme]

I find myself cooking less for my son now, and when I do it almost makes me sick to my stomach, should I just put my food on the table and say this is dinner or what??? I keep looking at both of us (overweight and out of shape) knowing his daddy crossed over at 49 yrs old, and wanting to save my son from the SAD food as he grows older....but, there is always a but, he does not eat what I put out there, he is a junky. and although I have started him on better junk (if there is such a thing) I do not want to cook this stinking meat anymore???

[Sharon in Colorado]

How old is your son? What's his health like right now?

[Rawkinlocs]

I don't know, Glad2be...I have mixed feelings on this one. I mean on the one hand, I don't think things should be 'forced' but at the same time, I think we have to sometimes put our foot down as parents.

With my kids, I allowed them to have some compromises. I won't force them to go raw, but I ALWAYS talk to them about the benefits, point out how sick family members are so they can see what eating garbage and junk can and WILL do to them over time and when dh and I made the decision no more meat, that was that...no more meat! I picked up soy meat alternatives and they're content with that, but I also fix things like rice, veggies, etc. for them.

But again, I won't force them to eat all raw, but there are just certain things I won't allow in this house and they've learned to live with it. I often ask them, out of all the ACCEPTABLE foods, what are your favorites...what do you like to eat...what types of veggies, fruits, etc. and based on that, that's what I buy a lot of so they can never complain of being hungry. But while they may desire breakfast sausage, cow's milk, candy, etc, they know it's not happening.

How old is your son btw?

[glad_2beme]

he is 8 yrs old, and adorable if I say so myself! I am like you, I am mixed on this one. The force issue is bad for me because his dad was a clean your plate or else person, and this is dinner don't ask for something else attitude (even though it was SAD, very SAD). Anyway, I stilldo cook for him, but it seems to be less now, and I DO NOT take him to the store w/ me anymore. I guess I will just keep trying to help him make better choices.

[Gosia]

glad_2beme, I highly recommend that you try making smoothies. My 13-year-old son also is not 100% raw, but he eats far more raw than before. And, introducing smoothies was a major breakthrough. Both my children used to have cornflakes and soya milk for breakfast. Then, I introduced smoothies and they both absolutely love it! They have smoothies for breakfast and they have them in the afternoon as well, even for dinner. After school, I encourage my son to have fruit before he goes for anything else. So, if I serve cooked dinner for my kids, it is at the end of the day, after they've eaten fruit, smoothie etc. They do not complain! They are happy to have a smoothie any time. And, try making banana-raspberry icecream, it is absolutely delicious! I give my kids yummy raw stuff, so that they have less space in their tummies for cooked food. It works. Gradually, they eat more raw.

Best,
Gosia.

[glad_2beme]

thanks for the inspiration Rawkinlocs & Gosia. He does do smoothies, bananas, tangerines (sometimes) and salads w/ dinner. Alissa's book is on the way, so I know if he gets in the kitchen and helps do some things he will be more apt to try them too.

I hope to sneak some greens on him soon ( :

Thanks Again
Melissa

[Melissa]

Hi Melissa. We have some things in common...our name for one thing and having an 8 yr old son! (My son will be 8 in Jan.)

Perhaps you can talk to your son about being vegetarian (if giving up meat is not the biggest issue for him) just so you don't have to deal with meat?
( I cooked the Thanksgiving turkey this year and it really turned my stomach. Never used to bother me. I like the idea of including him in the kitchen. When my son helps me make something he's much more likely to eat/drink it.

A last thought (please forgive me if this is obvious or too personal)-- Your son may have some fears after losing his father. It might worry him to have a strong connection made between his father's food choices and his passing away, especially if he identifies with his dad. Just a thought.
You are the greatest example for your son (I'm sure this applies to more than just raw food) He will follow your enthusiasm for fresh food eventually.

[glad_2beme]

thanks Melissa, yes I am sure he does hold onto dad that way too, seems I do nothing right this past year, but I continue on. He is just like his dad, and that is good except for the food. Chicken could be 3x day 7 days a week (yuk) I also like him in the kitchen with me, and yes, the meat is my main issue, I don't care for it, I don't want to cook it, and I read soooooooooo much on the chances we are taking eating it...scary to say the least. I hope your right about him following my lead.

If anyone knows other secrets, (I know the book , will provide some ideas for me too) I will be most appreciative. I ordered a dehydrator today (so maybe fresh fruit leathers will be swapped for the sugar ones in the store)!!!

[Sharon in Colorado]

I feel a great connection with your son. When I was 9, before my 10th birthday, I lost my dad. It was totally health related - heart attack at age 39 from hereditary high cholesterol. When my blood was checked, I inheredited that trait and my mom had me on egg beaters, mocha mix ice cream and low fat cottage cheese. I still ate animal food, just no 'liver' or anything with really high cholesterol, but I was encouraged to eat all the white meat (fish and chicken). I ate lots of bread with margarine, fake sausages, etc.

I think it is really important to give a wide variety of fresh fruits and vegetables to young children, like Gosia said, often and especially before a cooked meal. Sooner or later your son is going to acquire a taste back for it. After all, it wasn't that long ago that he was eating pureed fruits and veggies, right? The sooner, the better, I say.

Give him fruit smoothies for breakfast, and slowly change his breakfasts to homemade oatmeal (no Quaker - gosh the Quakers would croak if they knew that their names represented processed junk food)...

...for lunch always cut up an apple or piece of fruit and include plenty of baby carrots to nibble on, in addition to his usual fare.

For dinner, start off with melon or oranges, then a big salad and then a basic dinner, simple veggies, steamed, and organic meats.

Slowly, gradually add in more fruits.

Add before taking away, always.

I know the Boutenko family did it, removed everything cooked from the home, but they were all full of health problems. Unless you son is having some major health probs, I wouldn't recommend shocking and starving into submission.

Everything you give with love in your heart, will eminate through your hands when you are preparing it for him, and sooner or later he'll grow to enjoy what you give him.

All the best to you!

[glad_2beme]

aww, you made my eyes misty....thank you

[glad_2beme]

Thank all of you for helping in what I am going to do - Sharon thank you for the dose of love reality.

I am waiting on MY BOOK from ALissa now. Should be here tomorrow or next day. I am going to make my shopping list, remove the rest of the junk from house, and have the fridge stocked with yummy snacks for him to choose from. From all that I read from all of you - there should be plenty for him to experiment with!!!

Thanks Again - I really appreciate all that I learn from all of you

[yeahbethany]

You should like Alissa's book! One of the testimonials in there is from a 12 year old boy! He talks about how they transitioned him to raw (his mom went raw first). Also, there are several books out there about transitioning children to raw foods. Check amazon.com for a book called "Raw Kids". I forget the author though...

[glad_2beme]

thanks for the info, I am set to make this change and make it fun for him too

[Helen Of Tennessee]

Hi glad_2beme,

Here are a couple of links that may be of interest:

Raising Raw Kids Video
by Kytka Hilmar-Jezek
http://www.waldorfhomeschoolers.com/raisingkidsraw.htm

HEALTHY KID STORIES
Real stories from real veg families to give you inspiration and courage on your vegetarian journey.
http://www.vegetarianbaby.com/stories.shtml

Eating Without Heating
Sergei and Valya Boutenko
http://www.rawfamily.com/products.htm#books-english
(you can read the first chapter on-line where the kids tell their story of going raw)

I have many articles on why not to eat meat, but I thought maybe these would be geared more towards your son's age.

<>< Helen of Tennessee

[glad_2beme]

oh thank you very much!!! will check this out