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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Connecticut
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    Default families, menus, help

    Hi everybody,
    I posted this on the 18 and Under thread but realized I should post it seperately....so here 'tis

    I am turning 18 in one month (agh! scary) and I was all raw except for a vegan multi vitamin suppliment. I have been really thin all my life, but still really healthy-its a genetic thing, I guess. Then when I was 14 my mom remarried and I became depressed and lost a lot of weight (which was really bad since I was already quite thin) so I was accused of having an eating disorder and have been in and out of treatment since because it is so hard for my body to maintain the middle-end weights the ED places want me to be. It was been really hard because I try SO hard and I could so easily be all raw and I feel much healthier when I am (as long as I get enough food with a good amount of fats and some protein). But, alas, I cannot until I move out unless I want to be sent away to an ED place again. So I am in a tough situation and was looking for some help.
    My mom has forced me to go to this anorexia study (even tohugh I really really do not have an eating disorder...I like eating lol and I want my body to be strong and healthy) where they have the parents force the kids to eat foods and the kids aren't alllowed to make or serve their own food, etc. That is sooo aggravating and I don't know what to do. The woman just keeps telling me that I have anorexia over and over and it is so condescending, demeaning, humilating, frustrating. And she says I have to gain 20 pounds even though, according to a healthy BMI for my height and age, I am only about 3 pounds underweight. So I would not mind gaining like 5 pounds but I could never gain 20. Anyway, They wont listen to a word I say. So today I agreed that if I am allowed to help cook my meals and stuff I will share dinner with the family. I always ate dinner with my family, but had my own food. For some reason this makes my mom SOOO mad. So I have agreed that if I can pick recipes and help cook I will bend to this silliness. I only have four weeks until I am18 and then I can end my services in the program as it is voluntary (omg I hope I can end it! I must be able to at 18, no? all my blood work, EKGs, and vital signs are totally healthy)

    So here is my question, does anyone have any good, SIMPLE, fortifying recipes? Raw or just super healthy vegan that will seem good and sustaining to my family? And that will have variety? Can anyone help with a sample menu because I am just at a loss of late. I want to eat all raw except at dinner I can't always eat raw recipes because my mom will be SO ANGRY.
    I want to be super healthy, I want to do what is best for my body, and I am also on a fairly tight budget (aren't we all). PLEASE HELP! Oh, btw, I also have some difficulty with digesting so please nothing too too complicated.
    Thank you so much

    I have to gain a pound a week (until I quit in April) btw
    "Once we have reached our destiny we understand that it is different from the dearest wishes of the beginning, it is much deeper, broader, sometimes greater...either we understand or we sail on, and on, and on."
    ~Xandria
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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    San Jose, CA
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    Default

    Hey Girly! Wow, you're 18 almost already!? I remember when you were on this board talking about being sent away We all had you in our thoughts, hearts, and prayers, B!
    Yes, you should be able to do w/e the heck you want to when you turn 18! If you're healthy, there is no reason to go to that anorexia study thing.

    As for meals...hmmm...a lot of "satisfying" meals on raw, especially ones that would satisfy SADers, are a bit more expensive because they contain nuts or special ingredients to mimic cooked dishes. I would try to eat as much raw as I could and then maybe have something vegan with the family? like pasta made with brown rice instead of wheat? then there's like stir-frys and things. Then, when you turn 18, eat raw at dinner. This is how my household was. when I moved back home when I was 19, my parents ate together and I would eat whatever on my own. Or, I would eat my food while they ate their food so we'd be together.

    hmmm, hopefully someone else will chime in soon.

  3. #3

    Default

    Hi,
    Your post has struck a chord with me. I am a mom and I truly believe that your own mom is worried about you and that is why she is doing what she is doing. I know it is frustrating to you (and I can completely understand that), but hopefully you know that she is motivated by love and caring for you.

    i'm guessing you were eating raw-ish when your mom re-married and you lost weight. Because of that (i think), your mom is equating raw food with an eating disorder. hopefully, in time, her view will change.

    it also sounds to me like you and your mom are engaged in a fairly classic power struggle. Interestingly, I think that sometimes this battle of the wills manifests as controlled eating which can be viewed as an ED. I just put this out there as something to think about.

    if i were you, i would try my best to simply take the focus off of food. come up with some recipes that you can cook and eat together and just enjoy the company. treat the food as a non-event so to speak (it's there to provide fuel, not the end-all be-all that defines you).

    for fortifying, inexpensive family dinners, how about theme nights (Italian, southwester, asian-inspired etc):

    for italian, you could have lasagna (vegan, raw, whatever), pasta with pesto, salad (cesar, regular, whatever).

    southwestern could start with guacamole, i have an awesome speghetti squash recipe (cooked, but vegan).

    asian could include veggies, pasta or something with peanut sauce, an asian cole slaw.

    you can do this! check out Natalia Rose and Joel Fuhrman for healthy, vegan (cooked and raw) recipes.

    Good luck!

    Happy almost birthday!

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