How do you cope with non-raw family members?

[Kristi]

I live with a husband and 2 kids. They are still eating the regular way we used to. I cook for them. I try to find time to eat for myself around caring for them. Sometimes it just seems easier to eat the same way even though I know I will feel worse. I was just wondering how other people handle this.....I know Kirk has been struggling with lack of family support. Anyone else?

[Rawkinlocs]

Here here!

I have 4 children and a husband. They don't still eat the exact same way we used to eat, but they aren't all raw either. My dh is trying to eat as much raw as possible, but has no qualms with eating veggie burgers or chikn patties, chips or a few other items. He doesn't eat meat and whenever he does eat something that is bad, his body lets him have it and he says, "No more of that for me".

The kids...they eat a lot of fruit during the day...my oldest son (13) still wants turkey slices for lunch because he says the soy-based stuff was gross. He is still very much a carnivore at heart because if/when offered to him (away from home of course) he'll eat a burger or chicken or pizza with no second thought. My youngest daughter (12) wants to be raw, but she has her weakness foods too and her moments. She eats tons of fruit, but still eats the veggie patties and the chips and things of that sort. But she has expressed that one day she will go raw. My son actually says that he'll probably do it when he's a little older

My youngest daughter (6), she desires to eat certain things like candy and such, but knows I won't buy it for her. My baby likes eating raw. I prepare the veggie patties or nuggets and he usually just takes a nibble and then doesn't want them anymore. When he sees me with a smoothie or something, he'll want that instead, so I give it to him.

But sometimes when he sees the other kids eating things, he'll want what they have.

I only wish dh and I had began getting into this way of life when our two eldest were smaller...wouldn't be SO much easier now. But they were raised on the SAD and it's been trying to convert them over. My not being a good example doesn't help much. I try to be and when I do eat things contrary to the raw diet, I sometimes apologize to them for being a poor example. They usually tell me that they're proud of me and that I'm doing good despite my little setbacks.

It's hard, but I try not to give in too much. I know how you feel Kristi...it would be easier and probably cheaper to eat the same way, but then I think to myself that if I do that, I'll reap more negative than positive.

But I do find myself cheating and eating some of the items that are here for them. I try not to, and sometimes I'm successful, but oftentimes I end up giving in to the craving/desires.

I won't give up, though. I just keep on trying and doing my best each day and if I end up grabbing something that isn't raw, I don't beat up on myself like I used to. I've been praying and asking for strength over these desires and to have more control over myself and that my desire for certain foods would diminish.

That's all I can do. Just keep pressing on! I would much rather claim to be raw and slip up from time to time than to say "screw it!" and go back to eating cooked foods full-fledge. For me, that would be futile!

Keep your head up, be encouraged and know you're' not alone! Raw comes easy for many, but for many of us, it is a battle both inward and outward! (((hugs)))

[Curtis]

I can't say I can relate because I am by myself atm and have no children. But I hope in some small way I can encourage you all to take Rawkinlocs attitude. I am not 100% raw yet but the things I have ate are at least vegan.
I am glad to say even though it was rough I am off of coffee. :) Been almost 2 weeks and my body is adjusting to not having it. You ladies have no idea how much I learn from you and how much encouragement I have gotten reading your posts. :)
Kristi always remember no matter how hard one falls the only real loser is the one who won't get up and go again. And as your life is changed little by little folks around you will noticed and hopefully will desire the same thing.

[ConsciousCuisine]

My daughter is 11 and an Organic Vegan who is 65%+ Raw. On the days I am not working the whole time she's home, she's 95%+ Raw. My SoulMate is also an Organic Vegan who happens to be a giant (He's 6'10) and has been Raw and done "cleanses" with me for many months at times, however he prefers to eat a 50/50 Raw and Living and Cooked Whole Foods Diet.

I also cater some parties that are only 50% Raw and 50% cooked, so I am constantly around foods that, while they are 99% healthier than the S.A.D., are *not* healthy for me.

Sometimes when I am making Organic, Sprouted Grain Bean and Tempeh Grilled Veggie burritos for my sweeties, I catch myself about to do something and then think "Oh. I don't lick the beans off of the spoon. I Don't eat cooked food..." and then carry on, asking one of them to do it instead... :)

I am sad that my daughter won't be even more Raw, sometimes. Then I remind myself that she drinks Superfood drinks every day, eats Raw Nori Rolls, Smoothies, Salads, Fresh Juices and so on and is where she needs to be for now. She's amazing and is learning lessons that will aid her for a lifetime, like the fact that she feels energized and happier when eating Living, Raw foods. I just keep making fun, healthy foods and the % of Raw keeps going up in my household. :)

[Kristi]

Thanks. You all are so supportive and wonderful. I don't know what I'd do without all of you!!!!!! You remind me that I'm not the only one with challenges. Thanks so much!

[Analeah]

Wow I really feel for all of you out there who still have to cook food. I don't think I would be able to do that myself! Whenever I am preparing food I always have to taste all the time so I think if I cooked any food it would be disasterous for me so I just want to tell you all that you are so very strong! Though the family I live with still eats cooked food so I still have temptation, I try to limit it as best I can. I have a separate part of the cupboard I use to store my food and in the fridge too and I think this helps a lot. I have to feed the baby cooked food most of the time which I really hate doing but as I don't have to make the food for him most of the time it's not so bad. Now when I make cookies and other dehydrated yummies I offer some to him which he just loves and the mother is happy too because she knows they are healthy. What would happen if you refused to cook food for your families and instead offered them really yummy raw food? I think if I was living with a dh and/or family whom I had to cook for I would just offer them all sorts of wonderful raw foods instead and let them know if they want to eat cooked food that is fine but they have to make it themselves. Anyway just know try to remember the more you eat that is raw the healthier and happier you will be and also it sets an example for others living with you. And remember where you once came from and how far you have come! Once again I just want to say that you guys don't know how strong you are so you really should be proud of yourselves!

[Kristi]

Their raw has definately increased. I offer as much as I can but I think there would be a mutiny and they'd have me walking the plank! I also think what I do prepare that is cooked is far better than what they'd prepare for themselves. I'm also terrible at preparing raw recipes.

[Sweet lips]

My family is not all the way raw. I realize that I have to plan everything out so that it is ready because we are really into the busy season of our life. Kristi, I do understand what you are going through because my guys will pop in a veggie burger, or chik patty on bread in a heartbeat, make cooked pasta, and potatoes and eat cookies. Darn that cookie monster. I do feel being 100% raw is much easier when it is a family affair, but I am taking it one step at a time - my health is improving, I am down a dress size and 1/2, mind is clearer and depression is not always looming. and with DH who feels so much better eating this way, it is going to work . DH said that he realizes it is a lot of work for me, but will do it if I fix the food. So with that encouraging statement, I have gotten a tad frustrated though, since we both work outside the home, I would like a little assistance - it will come.

However, my 16 year old all his life vegetarian cheese eater was very opposed to not having cooked food. I have struck a deal with him, beginning Oct 1, to let me plan his menus and as we work together for me to be 100% raw - yeah I am committing to it and he to eliminating the junk out of his diet.
He has enjoyed some of the foods I have prepared and he is a smoothie junkie, so its working in some areas

I find that other family members are curious, so the main stream things- raw gourmet - that are supposed to be appealing to them, I fix and share. Sometimes they like it, and sometimes they don't, but it the same for me as well. I still have not gotten the hang of Nori rolling, and I know that once I do, it will appeal to them.

With all the benefits I have received, I feel like I just been bumping my head - I don't know why I haven't stayed 100% - I guess that is another thread. I am feeling you Kristi, but since are such a shinning example (girl, you really got it going on), they will soon follow suit. It is just a matter of time.

Be blessed in your comings and goings

[Rawkinlocs]

Wow I really feel for all of you out there who still have to cook food. I don't think I would be able to do that myself! Whenever I am preparing food I always have to taste all the time so I think if I cooked any food it would be disasterous for me so I just want to tell you all that you are so very strong! Though the family I live with still eats cooked food so I still have temptation, I try to limit it as best I can. I have a separate part of the cupboard I use to store my food and in the fridge too and I think this helps a lot. I have to feed the baby cooked food most of the time which I really hate doing but as I don't have to make the food for him most of the time it's not so bad. Now when I make cookies and other dehydrated yummies I offer some to him which he just loves and the mother is happy too because she knows they are healthy. What would happen if you refused to cook food for your families and instead offered them really yummy raw food? I think if I was living with a dh and/or family whom I had to cook for I would just offer them all sorts of wonderful raw foods instead and let them know if they want to eat cooked food that is fine but they have to make it themselves. Anyway just know try to remember the more you eat that is raw the healthier and happier you will be and also it sets an example for others living with you. And remember where you once came from and how far you have come! Once again I just want to say that you guys don't know how strong you are so you really should be proud of yourselves!

Analeah,

Thank you for your words of encouragement and your empathy.

I thought about not cooking anymore, etc. But I honestly don't think that would be fair under the circumstances. We've always eaten cooked foods and it's enough, I think, that I have eliminated a LOT from their diets, but to stop cooking altogether and tell them "Look, I don't want to cook foods, so cook it yourselves!" would be a bit much ONLY because this is all new to all of us. I think it would have been different if we had been raw-vegan all our lives and then one day, the dh and kids decided they no longer wanted to be that way and wanted to eat cooked foods and junk foods. THEN I'd have absolutely no qualms about saying, "Well, that's your decision but don't expect ME to cook it!!".

Kinda like if dh and I were never church-goers and didn't raise our kids that they had to go to church and then one day we start getting into going and our kids are now older and used to not going and we force it upon them.

I just don't want to be too forceful with this because then once they get older and leave home, they'll FLEE from this lifestyle and gorge on eating crap foods.

If I carefully just guide them, make some changes, share what I learn and the dangers of eating certain things, then once they get older, the seed's been planted and (hopefully) they'll make the decision to do the right thing as opposed to having it forced upon them now and then later decide (out of rebellion) to do what they want to do.

So, that's my thinking at this point and it seems to be working. My girls do talk of wanting to eat healthier and healthier and my son...while he still loves junk, he says that he is hearing what I'm saying and that eventually he'll change over.

[Analeah]

Hey Rawkinlocs, I totally know where you're coming from when you say you don't want to force it on them. I have always been vegetarian but one day I remember my mom told my sibs and I that eating dairy products was bad and we were going to stop. She basically forbade that and candy too which was hard for us kids at the time and I know it made me want to rebel. Needless to say the ban on dairy didn't last too long. I know she only wanted us to be healthy but the way she went about it probably wasn't the best. I think if she had more of the attitude of 'I'm not going to eat this because it's not healthy (and this is why its not healthy) and I would prefer it if you didn't eat it but it is your decision and I won't be making food with this in it anymore etc that the situation might have been a little better. By not cooking food imo you are not forbidding it for them you are just no longer making food for them which you know is unhealthy. But something I didn't really mention before is that I only think doing something like this would help if you are able to prepare food that they enjoy eating at every meal which I know would be a lot of work. So if someone doesn't have the time to make meals for everyone that they will like eating then I agree it really is better to make healthy cooked food rather than let them make/eat cooked junk food. I think introducing them gradually like you are doing is key and the more raw food you eat and make will keep the exposure to healthy food high.

[mwjeepster]

I really get away with murder on this subject - I have never cooked for my family. dh has always been the cook because I have always hated it. I do all the buying and cleaning up - but I don't cook. So all that has changed is I don't eat what my dh cooks, I make my own food. Sometimes I have to have it before or after they eat because I can't handle seeing stuff like pizza right now. So I'm of no help - sorry Kristi!!!

A cousin of my dh's just called - he's here from Michigan for the weekend and invited us out to dinner - I'm a little scared - I'll just order a salad - and I will bring a lot of fruit with me as it's in the city and I can eat while on the way there or back depending.

I finally got a food processor today (can't wait to play with it!!!) and we're ordering the dehydrator tomorrow. While my dh will never be raw, he is very supportive of me at this time, so at least that helps.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend!!!
Love,
Melissa

[RawGuru]

Check this quick movie I made about this subject!

http://www.rawguru.com/top5.html

[Curtis]

Have fun Melissa with your food processor been learning to use my the last to weeks. Trying new recipes with it is really fun!

[Analeah]

Hey cool I think you'll have a lot of fun with the food processor! I just made ice cream with mine and it came out great. Anyway about the restaurant, what kind is it? I remember going out to a Japanese restaurant with some friends and I asked the waitress if I could get a certain stir fried dish only not cooked. It was no problem and they brought it out with some kind of peppery spicy sauce on the side. I'm sure in some restaurants this wouldn't be possible lol but remember it never hurts to ask the waiter or cook etc at a restaurant if they came make something raw other than just a salad!

[Kristi]

Check this quick movie I made about this subject!

http://www.rawguru.com/top5.html

Love it! How's this..........raw food ~ ~ It's not just for rabbits!