DRUG of choice.

[rawpriestess]

Sometimes it can be hard to stay raw.

Sometimes life comes in around you, and you just want to stuff it all down with your addictive substance of choice, mine was always cooked food, specifically wheat and dairy. I did smoke for a few years, too nasty for me, drank, but I always got sick, so food was it for me. oh and the occasional sexcapade or shopping spree. LOL always for my house.

But when you commit to eating raw, there is no stuffing down the feelings, all you can do is FEEL them, and sometimes it just seems way too hard to go through that.

My son told me, to NOT work, do NOT block your feelings with your work. and I had to think about that. I am a work-a-holic, could this be why? is work NOW my addictive substance of choice?

I think he has a point. I work until I fall down, or close to it, whether it be painting or writing or ebay, or this board, or vacuuming or gardening, or anything, I've always worked until there is nothing else to do, or I will find something else to do.

Odd, I never thought of it as addictive, I thought of it as compulsive, and obsessed, but not addictive.

because, I always think of addictive as a doing something BAD, and yet working until I drop isn't good, nor is it what is best for me.

My past lovers, have always said I worked way too hard, I just thought they were lazy, that I was the mover and shaker of the bunch, and they could just sit on the sidelines.

Well, what happens is that I expect others to have my same standards of working until they drop.

But they think working until some of it is done is enough, and for ME, it is NEVER enough, NEVER. There is ALWAYS something more to do, always.

it never ends, life is not a project, that has a beginning and an end, it is on-going, like email, you can never answer all of it, it never ends, even if you get all of the emails in your inbox answered, give it 2 seconds, and one more will be in it's place.

So, with this said, am I stuffing down the feelings with work?

hum work ,food, both 4 letters, just like dope, drug, hummmmmm.

[Dimond]

There are so many different ways we all "drug" ourselves to cope with life. Sometimes you need to in order to survive. Rawpriestess, it's great that you are recognizing what you do and maybe you can find a better way to deal with things. You sound like you're always constantly improving yourself in all areas. I like to read your words of wisdom that speak of the path I'd like to be on someday.

[pomegranatebliss]

But when you commit to eating raw, there is no stuffing down the feelings, all you can do is FEEL them, and sometimes it just seems way too hard to go through that.

I totally believe that is why most people go off raw. It's not that the cooked food tastes so good, it's that it allows people to shift their focus off of the emotional issue and onto beating themselves up over slip-ups.

About addictions, I do believe that there are good things that can become addictive. I've read that most people give up one addiction only to replace it with another. I guess in my mind, overdoing a good thing is better than a bad one, but it all comes down to following our own personal journey to me.

You may call yourself a workaholic today but a few years from now, that may balance itself. You are doing what serves you in the now, and you are doing what helps you keep your focus on your personal growth.

I don't see anything wrong with that. :)

[juliebove]

Yes, work can be used so you can block out problems. And so can other things. When I was a dancer, I danced and danced all the time. My daughter is the same way. I don't think we were/are using this to block out problems though. We do it because we enjoy doing it. When I am writing, I can get so caught up in the writing that I don't want to stop for any reason. I can be the same way when I'm doing artwork or a craft project. But these are all creative things. I think in this case the reason I don't want to stop is that I don't want to break the creative flow of energy. I know that with writing in particular, an interruption can cause me to forget where I was at, and sometimes I can never quite get back into that same place in my mind to continue where I was going with it.

For me, work is a different matter. Of course it depends on what I am doing. There are some things I have to stick with until the end and I get annoyed when I get interrrupted then. But other things are easy enough to stop and get back to later. I don't think anyone would ever accuse me of being a workaholic. I enjoy my free time too much.

I do know one woman who didn't technically work outside the home. Her husband owned a business and she did work there sometimes, but didn't draw a salary from it. But mainly she was at home. She felt compelled to work and work all the time. She even mentioned that old philosophy that idle hands are the devil's workshop. She was also a very religous person.

She would tell me that if she had finished all the housework, she would scrub the walls to give herself something to do. Or she would re-wash the already clean clothes. Because after all, it was a woman's lot to keep busy all the time.

I couldn't understand this. Why was she doing work that didn't need to be done? And she didn't just do it at her house either. She would actually go into people's houses and strip their beds, putting the sheets in to wash for them. No matter that they'd protest and say they'd just washed the sheets! She couldn't stand to see people sitting idle and if they were, she was going to do the work for them.

Things all changed for this woman when she became very ill. She is disabled now and in a nursing home, unable to care for herself. Now for the first time, she has had to confront emotions and such. It wasn't easy for her for a long time. She became bitter with the world. Nothing would please her. Now she finally seems to have found peace. How? I don't know. But she did. She now seems to be able to enjoy the world around her rather than control it. And I could be off base here, but that's kind of how I saw what she used to do. You won't do what I think you should be doing, so I will do it for you! Or something like that...

[miniaturelion]

hello rawpriestess!
this is an interesting topic. for me the key word is choice.
i am always examining my life & trying to make it better (break addictions, bad habits) i feel like i am constantly trying to make sure that i am growing, expanding, learning & improving. i too have been called a "workaholic" many times. but, for me it's about choice.
when i am under stress i can easily fall into stuffing my emotions down with cooked foods. the whole time i feel out-of-control & like i have no choice - i hate the way i feel, i hate myself - yet i can't stop - i am addicted! it takes a ton of energy & thought to break this negative cycle. thats how i've come to realize that cooked food is like a drug for me.
but, with work - i feel like i am doing what i want to be doing, i feel in control - like i am free, capable... when i work till i drop - i feel ok, i don't feel more & more overwhelmed (like i do when i am eating junk) in this way i feel like it is a healthy way for me to deal with my (at times) overwhelming emotions.
cooked food makes me feel "stuck", more stressed, out-of-control, like i'm on a downward spiral. i feel ashamed & bad about myself.
working too much makes me feel "free", maybe i'm stressed but, i don't feel like i am drowning. the same goes for exercising - sometimes i will dance & dance when i am stressed out - & i will cry while i'm dancing - cause it's a release.
i think it's ok to work too much - at times. it can help you "work" thru things. i feel like artists in particular need to have extra outlets for their emotions.

[Lunar*Fey]

You are so wise Rawpriestess, your wisdom never ceases to amaze me. You seem to be able to look at yourself as if you were watching from another being....if that makes sense. Any way, yes in my opinion working can definately become an addiction, or at least a way to stuff emotions. eating disorders and workaholism (lol) often go hand in hand. Often, when you over work yourself you are either avoiding food or the opposite. People can use work to fill a void...just like food/lack of it, drugs, alcohol, constant exercise, etc. I hope I am not just talking in circles here.

Maybe you should take some time off of...well...everything. Use this time to find yourself and your emotions by searching deep inside of yourself. Try deep meditation and do slow, peaceful things like yoga. Surround yourself with complete tranquility....

sure...work is good. But when your life becomes work.... wake up, work, eat one bite, work work work work, drop into the bed and repeat......then you lose the ability to listen to your inner self. Listening to your body becomes near impossible when it comes to addictions.

and you don't want to bounce from one addiction to another...for although each addiction is different, they all entail a lack of being true to yourself and listening to your body.

we all love you rawpriestess, and I wish you well in your times of struggle. I know you are strong, and I know you are gifted. :) <3

[codajess]

I think there's nothing wrong with LIKING to work. I think an addiction is something that you really don't want to do, you know you shouldn't do it, but you do it anyway. I won't say I like cleaning, because I do a half-assed job, but I like a clean apartment. I don't dust, or wash windows or anything, but I vacuum, do dishes, change sheets, pick up cat toys and do all the laundry at least once a week (daily for dishes, of course.)

I LIKE working. Aside from the fact that I really like my career, I like knowing that I can take care of myself. I like knowing that the things I have, the things I do, the money I spent, I EARNED; and that I don't need anyone's help. I'm like a toddler in that aspect. I had a conversation with someone about how I ADORE the terrible twos. When kids are the worst for everyone else, I absolutely LOVE them. I was a toddler teacher at a daycare for a little under a year. I'd trade with the other toddler teacher. I'd take the girl who loved to bite. I'd take the little boy who everyone dreaded having in their group, and give them the little angel.
The person I had the conversation with said "You love them because you're just like them. You're so bullheaded and stubborn, and you like doing things your way. You're always fighting for your independence and proving that you can do things by yourself; just like a toddler. That's why you understand them and can handle them." I had that conversation about a year ago. I still remember it and it makes me laugh. I think of myself as Miss "Let me do it!" or Miss "I can do it myself!"

Everyone needs a stress reliever. For some people it's dancing, for some it's smoking, for some it's weed, for some it's work, for some it's cleaning. I don't think that makes it an addiction (some are, not always). I think it's an outlet.

[dreamrawalwz]

Am I the only raw foodist that can stuff down feelings with raw foods?

[Sharon in Colorado]

I think my drug of choice in addition to food is getting on the computer. I got away from it for about a few months, only checking on e-mail once a day or so and after other priorities were accomplished. Then I slowly got back into it during the summer.

Sometimes you have to find the right balance, because you can't totally eliminate that choice, like you could eliminate tobacco, alcohol or recreation drugs, etc. You have to find a healthy balance and not allow yourself to get over-immersed in it in an unhealthy way.

[Dimond]

Am I the only raw foodist that can stuff down feelings with raw foods?

Hey, I do that sometimes. It's gotten to the point where I can't have too many prepared goodies around or I'll eat too much too fast, just like with SAD snacks.
At least it's healthier though. I want food to just be something I eat for my health & not for emotional or social reasons.

[RawChicky]

Hey, I do that sometimes. It's gotten to the point where I can't have too many prepared goodies around or I'll eat too much too fast, just like with SAD snacks.
At least it's healthier though. I want food to just be something I eat for my health & not for emotional or social reasons.

YES I think I do that sometimes too. Or just eat when I'm bored, not hungry

[Lunar*Fey]

Tracey,
don't worry, I can stuff down emotions with raw foods too. I wish we didn't have this problem though!! grrr

[livingatthetop]

:) I don't do that anymore come to far to turn back now :)

[dreamrawalwz]

Tracey,
don't worry, I can stuff down emotions with raw foods too. I wish we didn't have this problem though!! grrr

Hmm yea Get online girl!

[mel123]

as someone who works in the mental health field...(working from a holistic paradigm)...i have to wonder if addiction is completely avoiable...yes, i do believe we should eliminate all addictions that are extremely harmful...but is it realistic to believe we can remove all addictions...i love to cook...i loved to cook sad and now i love learning to cook raw...is this an addiction?...sometimes it looks that way...but it is not harming me and i enjoy it...i believe i'm addicted to this board...but it is something i really enjoy...so as someone who has removed sweets, mindless sex, smoking, alcohol addiction, and eat a high raw diet...if i am still addicted to some benefical things...i gotta let myself have it...there are still some things i can learn to do moderately...but i will allow myself a bit more leeway with other things...and, yes it is so possible to use raw food addictively...to numb out...i have gotten my sugar hgih many times with raw sweets and oding on sweet fruits...imho...very humble