ShelShel
2-3-13
by
on 02-03-2013 at 07:48 AM (3734 Views)
Good morning. :)
I'm still thinking about things. Everyone had very kind, generous and good ideas. Thank you.
Bananna, thank you for your uncooking comment.. I have been doing this a long time. I do know what and how to do raw. Seriously. I am simply unmotivated for it as a way of life these days.
I would say that the biggest change in my life is working 40 plus hours a week. I was a stay at home mom when I began raw. I had all the time in the world to think and do raw.
My job is an extremely stressful one. A lot of constant pressure.
And actually, I just had a disturbing thought as I typed. It was this... "and besides, that is the last thing I need, my boss finding me attractive and hitting on me. I have already had to turn down his request for lunch together". Hummmm.
I could be hiding again. Ouch. This is a personal revelation I didn't realize I had in the back of my thoughts.
Because of something that happened to a close family member in my life, I'm afraid of men for the most part. It is a testament to the gentleness of my hubby that he slipped in under my radar. :)
So now I'm sitting here wondering if I'm afraid of having the men in our office notice me. It was safe when I was at home. It is safe when I'm fat and go unnoticed. But thin, healthy... Noticeable. That truly scares me.
I don't do well with fear. I prefer to kick it's butt rather than hiding from it.
So. I'm rethinking things. Could be running. Agh.
Hummm. I've acknowledged something important here.
I'm rethinking things. I could be coming back with a vengeance.
Write more after thinking. ((( hugs)))






. I have been doing this a long time. I do know what and how to do raw. Seriously. I am simply unmotivated for it as a way of life these days.
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