ShelShel

You will be missed too:) (((HUGS))) I think for everyone there is a time and a place. I totally understand your upset, as my hubby is pretty clueless too when it comes to dietary changes in my life. I am gluten intolerant and mine constantly "forgets" that - so I have to constantly remind him of it and try to keep my temper. It gets tough at times, and discouraging. I hope you can find your happy medium...

Thank you frugal raw. Take care and may you be blessed in your raw journey. ;)

Well if that something is sparkpeople I am there too....sorry, I did not end up posting my counsellor's revelations to me as I started but then my laptop died and I lost the whole thing...didn't even know it wasn't plugged in. :/

Anyways.....

You and I both suffer a bit from 'All or Nothing' thinking...she said that 'normal' people without eating issues naturally follow the 80/20 rule....meaning 80% of what they eat is healthy and 20% are less than healthy/treats. The goal is to be eating 80/20...do NOT aim for better...that's falling back into perfectionist thinking and one should avoid it.

With my chocolate issue she said:

Some people have certain foods that they just can't stop with...the goal is to not eliminate any particular food permanently but if you can't eat it in moderation than perhaps it is in order to quit said food for a period of time only and then baby step it back in...like in my instance, have a small amount of dark chocolate. I have done this with ice cream of which I used to be a major addict so I know this can work if I want it too...so far, since knowing my alternative is to quit for a time, I have been having much more success with moderation.

Also she said:

Recording your daily food intake, massive research shows, will get you eating healthy and losing weight because you are simply more aware. She guarded against counting calories, not ruling it out, but you have to be careful since a lot of people can develop disordered eating from counting calories. But just the simple act of writing down what you eat everyday...a journal only, substantially impacts weight loss alone.

Also, if you write down your emotions before, immediately after and 1/2 hr after eating, you can notice triggers, specific foods you eat for specific scenarios, etc....(she gave me a long list of emotions)...she said 75% of over-eating is emotion based.

Then she also said that habits are stressful to change, so even if your life isn't as emotional or stressful anymore, if you've been living in that habit of eating for long enough, you will still continue to eat that way because changing it is a stressful event, so it becomes less about emotion and more about maintaining habits.

....that's all I've got, but more would overwhelm a person anyway....so recording food, looking for patterns and triggers, aiming for 80/20...and considering alternatives to self-nurturing (she gave me a neat little list I will find and post later...some obvious like taking a bubble bath, others really neat like mailing yourself a card).

I've been trying to follow this...just following 80/20, while I could probably be doing better still, I am doing much better and am journalling my food. I was thinking of using this blogging area to journal, but if you're leaving...meh. I might just count cals over at sparkpeople instead..they have a raw vegan team and a strong 'raw raw' (no pun intended) motivational spirit over there.

I hear you on not wanting to be all raw anymore, I think I'm sadly over it as well, but not entirely...like I really do want to build two habits: smoothies and salads...I mean, that is totally in the realm of even 'normal people's' healthy eating mindsets anyway, so why do I have to label as 'raw vegan' and go all 'all or nothing' mindset???
...plus, all that fiber really Does help keep an even steady energy, good health and it is just easier to keep the calories in check too. It takes planning though, so I'm beginning to realize that I need to plan my meals a little better, or rather, my time/organization so I'm not continually left in a pinch.


And lastly!...she said that

ignore that lastly part, lol...don't want to leave you hanging...I had started that and then forgot what it was she said, and apparently added it above that..hahaha

Take care Bananna. (((hugs))) I will miss you, but I did sign into sparkpeople to try and say hello once in a while. :). Hope you do well in the future. Your councilor sounds smart! Thanks for sharing. Yea, I think the stress thing is totally where I am at. Unfortunately. I'm too tired and have my plate full. I don't have the time to really focus on me right now, so, I'm simply going to live. Love and laugh. It will come. Balance that is. It will. :). Good- bye.