Corbeau

So I just kept eating more and more cooked food. Allowing it to take me down to the worst depths of food hell: bagels (for me at least). The consequences of which are painfully obvious to me....bloated stomach, depression, anxiety, forgetfulness, fear...and some biological stuff I'll spare you all having to do with my intestines being completely full of crap (literally!) that did not want to come out.

I also fell off the yoga wagon. It seemed to all happen at once, and all of a sudden a darkness descended upon me. The joy with which i greeted every day was gone.

What's incredibly sad about the whole ordeal is that when I first started eating cooked foods not on my list, it gave me incredibly horrible stomache pains.....like my belly was going to burst open from all the pressure. And i would say "never again!" but then the very next day I did it again, and again...until my body adjusted and stopped screaming in pain at a meal of bagels and chips.

I'm convinced alcohol and coffee are gateway drugs to food addiction. Today, I vow to go back to raw with allowances for my "favorite foods" list. I am honest and compassionate with myself about my coffee addiction and will allow myself coffee in the begining under the sole condition that it does not lead me down a path of gluten sin (yes, I was raised catholic).