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rawpriestess
02-15-2006, 02:50 AM
10 years ago, I changed my life.

One day I was a meat eater, and the next day I was a vegetarian, there was no struggle, no thinking, no books that I read, no classes I took, no people I talked to, no groups I went to, no pot lucks, no stress, no mess, no fuss.

I was meditating, I had a vision, I knew I would never eat meat or animal products again. Plain and simple.

It hasn't been that way with raw, Oh, I've had epiphanies, I've had insights, I've had belief changes, I've had thought processes, I've been raw for 4 months at a time, and I've grown my own food, eaten only organic, taught the classes, taken the Gourmet Chef courses, I've done it all.

I walked the raw walk, and talked the raw talk.

I've definitely been there.

I've been the obsessed convert.

But, and that is a really BIG BUT--- I'm not 100% raw all the time, every day.

For what purpose am I choosing NOT to be 100% raw all the time, every day?

What a great question.

Because I am not ready.

How do I become ready?

By allowing it to be exactly what it is.

Hummm, sounds too easy.

It is, what we eat is NOT who we are, it is NOT our life, although it may be our lifestyle, but what we eat is a choice, we may make that choice every day, or every minute, but it is a choice.

Even if we believe that we are addicted to some foods, and I do believe that I am addicted to wheat and dairy, it still is a choice.

We control our own hands, and our pocket books, we can eat cooked or raw, or organic or not.

All of it is a choice, IF IT IS IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO US, we can make the choices to be raw.

That is the choice.

When I went vegetarian, I knew in my heart that I would NEVER eat meat again, but that was fine with me, I had a freezer full of meat, and I gave it away. It didn't even occur to me to be upset about all the money I had spent on it, because I wasn't depriving myself of something that I could see value in.

When ever we do something, we make a conscious choice to do it, or to not do something else, we make an emotional choice usually our choices can be based on logic, but are almost always based on emotions.

We do what we feel is the right thing to do, or the best thing to do, or what will work for us. Yes, we have been programmed from childhood to do certain things, like sleep inside, eat with a fork, brush our hair, none of these things are natural to us as humans.

We have societal and cultural beliefs, we have familial programming, we have TV and newspapers, teachers, and freinds, who have all helped to program us into believing a certain way.

Take the Fijian fisherman, and the person on Wall Street, they probably have different values in life, and they live differently, each one has a different belief in what makes them happy and fulfilled, neither is wrong, they are just different.

And I believe that what makes one person happy, may not make everyone happy.

Raw food is the natural way for humans to eat, and when we eat natural foods, we are not overeating to push down our emotions, we are not allowing the addictive behaviors to be more important that the food, we aren't keeping the cork on our emotions.

And then our emotions come to the surface, and we can choose to deal with them, or not, when we don't wish to deal with them, then we will do something to make them go away, like eating cooked food, then we can push down the emotions with "bad" food, and we can feel really guilty and terrible that we've eaten the forgidden food, and we can talk about it, and be all upset with ourselves, and go on and on about it. I know I've done that, may times.

But the most important thing that any one can do is to keep going, to not give up, to start that next moment, or day, or week or month, or evern year by eating what we know is good for us.

when I was young, I used to think if I could stop eating all together, that I could get thin, because I could go all day without eating, and I wouldn't get hungry until I ate a bite of food, so I would starve all day, sometimes more than one day, and then finally eat something, it never worked, the minute I ate something, I couldn't stop, and it had nothing to do with being hungry for food, I was hungry for anything, to keep down my emotions, my anger, my fears, my guilt, my sadness.

Now, I've been doing alot of internal emotional work, I've accepted that all emotions have a worthiwhile purpose, that no emotions is bad or wrong, it's really oaky to bet angry, it's okay to feel fear, it's okay to be happy, and elated, it's even okay to be madly in love with myself, to see my own inner light, and beauty.

While I am allowing myself to see my inner light and beauty, I can actually see that the food I eat is more important than just fuel for my body, although it maybe wasn't designed for that purpose.

Im my family, we didn't have enough food to eat, i can remember going to bed crying because we were too poor to have much dinner.

So having enough food to eat means alot more to me than simply feeding my body, it means being wealthy, being safe, being secure, being emotionally fed, being happy, being warm, being though of as good enough, being worthy, being accepted, being one of the many, being like every one else, being normal, being fulfilled, being full, being satisfied, being whole.

I know many of you may not be able to relate to this, that's okay, I can't always relate to peole who allow their spouses to abuse them emotionally, or people who have children telling them how to live their lives, and what to eat and do in their own home.

But, each person is different, we all have different needs and wants, and yet our bodies will work so much better on raw foods, if we just give it a chance.

So, although I am not any where near perfect at being 100% raw all the time, every day, I will strive to allow myself to make the best choices of raw, ripe, fresh and organic fruits veggies and nuts whenever I can.

Raw is the best way to eat on our planet, and the only way I choose to live.

many blessings,
Raw priestess

RawMagnolia
02-15-2006, 07:03 AM
I just have to comment that this is an amazing post. Very well written. I can tell that you have certainly done a lot of soul searching and have really started to "know" yourself. That's terrific.

I hope one day to be strong enough to get to know myself.

Blessing to you as well,
Sandra

jennplas
02-15-2006, 08:39 AM
Thanks for your post raw priestess. I always look forward to reading your posts, and especially when you talk about your thoughts and feelings. You are very honest and I admire that.
After reading your posts, I often need to reflect, so i always come out of it with something.
Thanks!
:)jennP

Raw Jewelrylady
02-15-2006, 09:29 AM
Rawpriestass, Very touching & "grounding" post....It seems like you & a lot of others (including me) have been doing a lot of "soul searching" into our Raw lifestyle.

I enjoy your posts, as you really put a lot of thought & grace into your words.

Bravo !!!! :)

Lana

PS... I've ordered a few of your "uncook" books...they are great... :p

Light of an Angel
02-15-2006, 10:25 AM
I definitely can relate to you RP! I have been thought for my entire life to be polite, never show my anger, have faith, put my feelings and thoughts aside in order to attend to others. I am just learning now that it is not only ok to show my emotions but it is healthy to express them. Everything is always in motion, nothing stays the same, we are design to move, process, release, and it is not natural to keep it all in!

I remember being spanked as a child when I was bad. These days its ok for children and it is encouraged for them to have temper tantrums. I feel that maybe we are moving in the right direction. See what you are feeling. Open up to it. Share it. Be open to let help in whatever shape and form it may come. You don't have to be afraid that you are a bad person because you feel something negative. Fear, anger, resentment, blame..they are all emotions that are not bad..they just are...

If we do that then we won't need food, drugs, or whatever other addiction to hide the truth. The truth is we are all the same. We all want to be happy, joyful and loved. We have been thought conditional love. You do this and I will love you. We need to open our hearts and start loving unconditionally.

Thank you for your post. It was wonderful!

Love and blessings

Dominique

kitchenfairy
02-15-2006, 03:51 PM
But, each person is different, we all have different needs and wants, and yet our bodies will work so much better on raw foods, if we just give it a chance.

******
Thank you for your post. Yes, my body is working so much better on raw.
I'm so happy to realize this.

Recently I've learned that my choices are my responsibility. I've stopped avoiding/taking the easy choice/procratinating. I'm now exercising for the first time in my life. Regularly with cardio/weights alternating. I'm at week five.

I'm responsible for how well my kids life is. Packing snacks, being nice to them, doing more stuff together. I'm choosing to take responsiblity for me now too.

Yersterday's work day had me trapped at my studio with my car in the shop.
Knowing I need survival food since I can't get a sandwich or salad at the deli
or home for lunch with better choices. So I grabbed two apples, my kids carrots with some of their un-raw dip, celery and almond butter(unraw too but want to use up more), lara bar and banana.It wasn't glamourous and I wished I planned ahead at start of the week. I survived my work day. Didn't even eat the almond butter or beyond a taste of dip. I had geen smoothie breakfast anyway. Love those. Felt like I accomplished an easy non-stress about food day.Didn't feel yucky later like when I eat a sad lunch.

I'm happier when I make good choices. If I'm in a situation where I can't or didn't plan ahead. My choice at those moments...now more than ever I make less bad for me choices. I'm proud of myself, this eating more pure and exercising has been an 18 year dream. I'm just recently there. Not 100% sometimes but I'm still proud.

karotw
02-15-2006, 04:53 PM
RP – WOW! As always I am blown away by what you write. I don’t always take the time to response, so today I am making a change and being very real (and probably long winded!)



I haven’t kept my raw struggles a secret but I haven’t posted a whole lot about them either – maybe justifying in my mind that this is a board for those are actually raw every day or to keep it positive for the newbies, etc. But this is a place for all of us to share about our raw experiences with Alissa’s book and philosophy in mind. So again, today I give myself permission to share.



I’m one of those of us who grew hiding my feelings and I’ve hide them REALLY well behind food – any food, actually and when I’ve eaten healthy whole foods, I’ve been better and when I’ve been as neat to raw as I’ve ever been (probably 80%) my mental and physical health were the best I’ve ever had. . .



This statement is SOOOO powerful for me.



<<It is, what we eat is NOT who we are, it is NOT our life, although it may be our lifestyle, but what we eat is a choice, we may make that choice every day, or every minute, but it is a choice.>>

And right now I’m continuing to choose everyday to eat cook food. I don’t like it very much, at least not on the outside, but some part of me is still needing to go there each day. One of my biggest issues is that I fight with myself. . that I try to be something that is inconsistent with what my inner self really wants. The act of beating myself up for years and years about not being able to lose weight, stay on a diet/food plan/program for more than a short period of time has taken it’s toll. And of late I have allowing myself to be where I am each day. I make a conscious choice in the morning to be a raw foodist today. And some days that lasts until 4 or 5 p.m. and other days it doesn’t last until noon. But each day I get up and make that choice and then later I choice to be someone who eats cooked food. Unfortunately it has been my obsession and in too many ways it is who I am become.

So, RP, your post is yet another wake up call. . . .How do I become ready? Well, I think and feel that I’m becoming ready each day when I make those choices and it may click tomorrow or it may takes weeks, months or years. Choosing raw food is one choice I make each day. Choosing to love myself and take good care of my body, mind and spirit is another. No judgment about doing it “enough” or “perfectly” or to please someone else.



So I continue to come here to RAW Food talk to read what you all have to say and to keep myself in the presence of raw food mindset and to remind myself to take good care of myself as best I can today. . I’m only as ready as I’m ready today.



Thanks for listening to my rambling share. . .



Many Blessings,

Karen