Please Help Me!!! I Am An Addict!!

[wikdkittie]

OK... I am very new to the raw food lifestyle and have absolutely no support in my household or other family members. They think I am doing another crazy diet. I still have to cook for everyone and it is all of the stuff I like to eat that they always want me to fix. :mad:
I have been eating at least 60% of my food raw at all times sometimes even better and I feel great. What is making me continue to eat what I know is going to make me feel like crap??
Also, I have been on anti depressants for oh about 9 yrs now and have been on up to 10mg of xanax a day but have widdled that down to only taking 4mg so I dont have withdrawl. I am so sick of being dependant on meds and cooked food. Can anyone tell me how in the world I can be raw and be on meds? I feel as if I am defeating the purpose and I cant stop the meds cold turkey bc I get like sick sick... like a heroin junkie kind of withdrawl that would keep me bed ridden for at least 2-3wks which I cant do bc I need to work and mommy everyone (including the fiance :rolleyes: )
I can really use any advice that anyone is willing to give.. Thanks.

[SamuelWilson]

My advice is to stay here with us. We can be your support group.

[Rawkinlocs]

Welcome Wikdkitty!

You will find that many here have been where you are or are where you are and will provide support to you. Here is a thread that I think you might want to read: http://www.rawfoodtalk.com/forum/showthread.php?t=567&highlight=anti+depressants

Some here have weaned off of their anti-depressants...some have quit them cold turkey. From things I've read here of others' experiences, I'd say perhaps you may not want to try dropping them cold turkey...just continue eating raw as much as you can (I KNOW firsthand how difficult it can be to stay raw in a household where everyone else is eating contrary - but it can be done...just give yourself time and patience) and allow your doctors or just your own intuition gradually take you off the meds. And as SamuelWilson said, stick around here for support!

One thing eating raw will do is bring up old stuff whether it be physical or emotional...detox is something that has to happen in order for you to heal and recover. Just be gentle with yourself. I'm sure others will come and offer you more in the way of advice and support!

[wikdkittie]

Thank you for the advice. I will def stick around bc I want to get off of the meds and just be natural and have everyting around me at peace and the house to stay clean. Just the simple things you know... :)

[lily]

Dear Wikdkitty,

I too am new to this way of life and have to cook for an unsupportive family who think that 'raw' is 'just another mad diet'.

Bit by bit I'm working things out -- and this forum is marvellously inspiring and helpful. One thing I've found really helpful is to get prepared by making batches of my favourite dishes and freezing them, so i can just get something delicious out of the freezer for myself and warm it through gently as necessary. This stops me being tempted by what I'm cooking for the others. Special faves so far are Alissa's Pecan Burgers (so yummy with the Curry sauce which I don't freeze but whizz up quickly), and my own pizza slices which I make by topping homemade flaxseed crackers first with a spread of cashew 'cheese' then some of Alissa's Marinara Sauce then pieces of cherry tomato, olives etc and i freeze them. I think these are as yummy as 'real' pizza. Alissa's falafel are another fave and freeze so well.

The other thing I've realised is that going seriously raw starts off a real process of transformation -- it really is life-changing. It seems to bring up all sorts of issues that have to be handled along the journey. I keep asking myself 'what is this teaching me?' I realise that one of my big issues is the desire to please everyone and to put myself last, put myself down, even. So keeping quietly and steadily on with the diet no matter how much criticism I'm getting is an important part of my 'path' to transformation. It's helpful to remember this when the family are doing their best to 'put down' the raw way of life. People are unsettled by the new and the unconventional which deep down they fear may make them have to change. The challenge is to stick to it, and to be an example, let the diet speak for itself and the healing take place inwardly and outwardly.

Blessings,

lily

[wikdkittie]

Thank you lily... you sound just like me. I am to the point right now that if I even smell food cooking I want to strangle my fiance. He was griping yesterday bc he had to order a pizza for dinner and then blamed me by saying " I had to eat pizza for dinner bc my girlfriend doesnt cook for me anymore"!! Come on, he is 30 and perfectly capable of cooking his own junk. He makes me feel guilty and so I feel the need to cook for him which leads into tasting which leads into a cooked dinner. I dont understand why he cant understand in order for me to be raw I feel I need to escape from the cooking process for a while so I can control the urges better. I do good all day bc people are not here or if they eat it is sandwiches or something that is not usually cooked but when dinner time is rolling around and we talk about what everyone wants for dinner for an hour before we make it I am ready to abandon raw for the junk. You know I just hate the fact that I have to take care of everyone but when I ask to be taken care of it is like the world is about to end. I need to take care of myself... why cant family understand?

[SamuelWilson]

wikdkittie, you are in a tough position. It looks like you are going to have to dig deep for the will power to not eat cooked food.

[debiannp]

He makes me feel guilty and so I feel the need to cook for him which leads into tasting which leads into a cooked dinner.

I feel your pain! I have MY snacks around while cooking. This helps eliminate my need to taste. I don't anymore, what comes out of the pot is what THEY eat. So mine always tastes better. LOL


Here's to being raw!

Debi

[wikdkittie]

I know I am.... I just went to the library and guess what??? No books on Raw Food at all!!! Unbelievable! There is an enormous variety on the net but not a one at the library. I have 2 books on the way but they are recipe books. I find that sitting around reading about the lifestyle and educating myself on it really helps with control.

[Rawkinlocs]

wikdkitty,

go to http://dyingtogetwell.com and download a free copy of her book, "Dying to Get Well". It's not a recipe book...but it does talk about raw foods, how she healed her body of fibromyalgia (sp?) and the horrible effects that Depo-provera (birth control shots) had on her body, amongst other ailments. But it's a very good read...I think you'd enjoy it and find it very motivating. It was my very first raw book ever (I got the hardcopy version...but the ebook is the exact same content)

[honeybee joy]

When I went off of my anti-depressants I was slowly tapering them down. Then one day I felt that my body was ready to be off of them, so I stopped. I had a little anxiety and light depresson for a few days, and then after that I felt much better. I rarely get depressed or anxious anymore, and am starting to think more positive. The only time I get depressed or anxious is when I eat cooked. There is a book called Depression Free for Life by Gabriel Cousens. I haven't read the whole thing yet, but I kinda goes thru the different reasons that people are depressed and what type of supplements and or nutritional deficiencys contribute to that.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060959657/qid=1137271359/sr=8-2/ref=pd_bbs_2/104-9481116-9782323?n=507846&s=books&v=glance

Here is a interview with Gabriel Cousens and his use of a product called E3Live. It talks about how he uses that instead of Prozac or other anti-depressants on his patients and how his has a high success rate.

http://www.e3live.com/generalpages/interview.htm

I just ordered some, so I cannot tell you if it works, but I have heard great things about E3Live. Cannot wait to get it.

Another thing I was thinking about was when you said:


Originally Posted by wikdkittie I am so sick of being dependant on meds and cooked food. Can anyone tell me how in the world I can be raw and be on meds?

Something that I have learned is that this is a journey. I think this journey is about loving yourself and being patient. Addictions do not happen overnight, and they do not go away overnight eather. I used to get sooo mad at myself because I did not feel that I was up to speed. Part of my detox was learning to be patient with myself and accepting that in this journey I was going to fail, and that was a uncomfortable feeling. Loving myself is accepting my failures. The thing I learned is to not get upset, but to get right back up and do it. I feel soo much better now that I accept that about myself. I also find that it is not as much of a struggle to do the things I am striving to do.
Just let this journey run its course and I promise that you will not be dependent on meds and cooked food. It will happen.
Good Luck

[honeybee joy]

Another thing I wanted to add, it is about this comment:


Originally Posted By wikdkittie
You know I just hate the fact that I have to take care of everyone but when I ask to be taken care of it is like the world is about to end. I need to take care of myself... why cant family understand?

From my experience in that situation, they are not going to understand, until you show them, maybe never.
You have been taking care of these people and probably ignoring your own needs for the past X number of years. This is what they are used to and what they know.
I have learned that you cannot wait for people to decide that you a worth being taken care of. I needed to decide that for myself. When I started to take care of myself, some started to believe that I needed/deserved to be helped out or that I was important also. There have also been those who just do not get it, and probably will not. It is not my fault. I just try to stay away from those people, because there negative energy is not fun to be around. If you think that cooking the food is too much for you, then don't do it. I am sure you will feel griping and complaining, but probably deep down they will respect you for it. They probably will not tell you this.

Someone was telling me as story that a therapist was telling them and it makes a whole lot of sence.
If you were on a plane and it was loosing control you would have to put the oxegen mask on you first, then your baby.

Then moral I got from that story is you cannot take care of others till you take care of yourself. Please do not feel guilty for loving and taking care of yourself. You cannot truly love someone till you love yourself.
You have to think of it in this way: If you are not taking care of yourself and meeting your needs then you will not be able to be the best wife/ mother/ friend/ daughter that you can be. When you look at it in that way, it doesn't seem so selfish anymore.
Hope this helps, I know this info helped me when I came across it.