who's the strange one

[Jo-anne]

I just had to share this with everyone as I honestly can't believe it. OK, i'm well pretty much overweight ok you got me iam actually obese, but hey so much for trying to "do the right thing" by my body.

The other day I was having lunch at work and was about to dig into my huge salad, now this was a HUGE salad, but thats all it was, various types of lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, zucchini, onions, parsely and mint with ACV dressing. So you can imagine my shock when the girls in the lunchroom could not stop looking at my lunch, "Oh My Goodness" are you going to eat all that! no I'm thinking of wearing it, of course iam going to eat it, but ummm dont you think that is well way toooo much salad........geeez can you believe this, I bet if I had walked in there with a big mac, large fries and large drink they wouldn't even have battered an eyelid.......I just don't get it, why is something that is very good for you eaten in large quantities raise eyebrows........who knows!

I guess they must be the strange ones but they sure made me feel like an alien and very guilt about eating that much salad........

[JMD]

I am sorry you had to experience that. In my experience...people commented on my meals---which where mostly green to their brown/white lunches with questions too. I personally feel they may feel guilty for eating what they are and are projecting it onto you. Misery enjoys company..in many forms. I know when I ate poorly, I wanted someone else to eat crappy to so I could feel "okay" about it.
Just keep your eyes on yourself. YOU are the only one who knows what you need. Find supportive people and when they comment on your lunch, just smile and say "YUP< I AM EATING ALL THIS AND IT IS YUMMY!!" Smiles versus defensiveness always deflects people:)

Good Luck!! and keep going....

[Sharon in Colorado]

A few good responses (not that you asked for any, but those kinds of comments make me think):

"Actually this salad contains no more calories than what you are eating."

"I left the other half of it at home"

"Mmmm...I love this lunch! Wish I could share but there's only enough for me!"

"Are you trying to get me to share (wink when saying it) because this is just so darned good I don't think I can!"

"This is my brain food. Now I won't be nodding off at my desk in an hour like you."

[Jo-anne]

just smile and say "YUP< I AM EATING ALL THIS AND IT IS YUMMY!!" Smiles versus defensiveness always deflects people

How true! JMD I LOVE that saying, I actually read it and re-read it a few times over and smiled when I did it, thank you so much, it puts a different perspective on things........and yes, you are right just keep going, that is exactly what I am going to do......I bet once I've lost my weight they will be the first ones coming to me asking me how I did it!

[JMD]

Sharon--

Your last response cracked me up. As a teacher in the public school system--I see it daily when co-workers or kids eat and then are comatose to learn/teach.

[Jo-anne]

Sharon you have some excellent come backs and I will definitely be using them....when they spoke like that I would just put my head down and continue to eat but always felt soo guilty that I would stop half way and throw the rest out, I hated that of course because I was still hungry........but I won't be doing that anymore, actually I look forward now to lunch time at work now that I have some very good responses to use.........Thanks Sharon, this will make a huge difference to me.

[Sharon in Colorado]

Thank you! Ya it always helps to have a good response, a positive one that makes people think. If you had said something like "would you rather me eat a Big Mac and fries" that would sound more defensive.

Oh - didn't know you were throwing out half your lunch. Girl! Don't do that anymore.

Anyway, we have to stretch our stomachs out for the real foods, we are accustomed to eating dense, fatty, dehydrated and cooked foods which fill our stomachs but in a bad way. We have to train our stomachs to get in lots of water rich fresh foods.

[Ariannah]

Yep. People don't realize that they can cut their big mac in to 1/4 of what it is and it'll still be more caloric than an entire head of lettuce with cukes, peppers, etc added! This is partly why I love my green smoothies. I can stuff a whole mixing bowl of lettuce into the blender, and it smushes it down to the "real" amount of it. Nobody bats an eyelash when I drink two and a half tumblerfuls (over one quart) of green smoothie. - in fact, they'll say "That's all you're gonna eat?". But the same amount unsmushed in a large bowl makes people boggle.

The mind is a weird thing. People's perceptions can be skewed indeed...

[JMD]

I agree----lately it is taking me a lot more fruit and veggies to fill up as we approach winter. Is this normal?? I can eat 3-4 more pieces of fruit. I do not do a lot of nuts/seeds maybe an ounce a day or dried fruit though I am craving dried figs.

PS Jo-anne I have found few females in my life that wanted me to lose weight and feel good. For some reason when a friend/coworker loses weight gets healthy one may get jealous. When I did lose the weight I felt like I lost some female friends. Today I see that if people cannot support me then they really are not my true friends. Go one day at a time keep smiling even if you want to PUNCH them and use the word Yummy or tell them that what YOU eat makes you feel GREAT and that is why you are doing it.

Stay true to you!!

[Jo-anne]

awww thanks everyone....

Sharon I hear ya.......no more half lunches ending up in the bin, I promise!

JMD you know I never thought about the jealousy factor but you may have a point there.

Rawandnatural....it is amazing how people perceive things, and btw that smoothie sounds quite delicious.

[hackerm]

I don't have any comebacks, but the salad I bring for lunch is so darn big it takes me almost an hour of eating to get through it. And the best part is that I don't feel sleepy afterwards!

[rawredbone]

I have found people are intimidated for some unknown reason of what is different that what they do or are use to. I work with big meat eaters. When I started with this company I was a Vegan and they talked about everything I ate or would fan meat in my face. When becoming Vegan Raw they implied, so does this mean you will eat raw meat now or, that seems like a lot of work. How much work could a salad be? They will even comment on my smoothies and the color of it.

I simply pray for them. My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge(Hosea 4:1-6)

[Sharon in Colorado]

I have found people are intimidated for some unknown reason of what is different that what they do or are use to. I work with big meat eaters. When I started with this company I was a Vegan and they talked about everything I ate or would fan meat in my face. When becoming Vegan Raw they implied, so does this mean you will eat raw meat now or, that seems like a lot of work. How much work could a salad be? They will even comment on my smoothies and the color of it.

I simply pray for them. My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge(Hosea 4:1-6)


That is not nice at all.

I've had someone stick a deer sausage under my nose before, like they were trying to 'tempt' me. That was probably the worst thing anyone has done. I told them to get that disgusting deer member out of my face.

I've also had a friend announce to the waitstaff "she's a vegetarian" as if I needed someone to hold my hand. Then the waitress looked at me sympathetically. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the Texas Road House grill, where my friend wanted to go, knowing I was a veggie, and it wouldn't have been so bad if every one of their salads didn't come with cheese, croutons and meat. Oh well, live and learn.

Actually stuff like that makes me re-think who my real friends really are. The ones that let you be who you are without trying to condemn you or 'help' you are your real friends.

[Ariannah]

It's difficult being in the company of standard eaters (I don't always say SAD because compared to other cooked eaters many that I know rarely touch junk), and just by being raw (bonus points if you're 99% organic) it can appear that I'm a snob who judges others. I mean how can it appear otherwise?

For instance, I homeschool, and somewhere on the list of "reasons" (albeit not my only reason - I do it because I love it) is my not caring to immerse my children in school culture. I eat raw, because I see only that as "real food" (not that I state that out loud in mixed company!) and won't touch anything else. The person beside me does the opposite of all of the above, so my refusal to partake can be seen as silent judgment against the other person!

Now, most people who know any details of my life, know that I do any of the things I do because of choice. But sometimes even standing beside a person and their tray of cookies and saying to them, "Eat up! Enjoy!" genuinely, while I choose the fruit tray can be seen as judgment whether it's intended or not. Know what I mean?

[StrawberryFields]

Well, good for you for turning to a raw foods lifestyle to get healthy! Don't pay any attention to the other women. This just shows how people are so uneducated about the right way to eat. Keep up the good work!

[Pailani]

If you cut up a salad small enough, you can fit a humongous salad in a bowl small enough not to draw attention. ;)

[sport]

I would prefer to draw attention. Who knows if somebody will be aware enough to ask out of interest and you may be responsible for saving someone's health by sharing your knowledge. You can learn not to take nottice of the others. I was vegi in rural Ireland in the seventies when such a thing was unheard of. I thrive on others contempt.

[kmik]

Please learn to ignore these insensitive people... I've been a vegetarian for over 20 years and have heard it all... my favorite is the guy who called me a "Veg-o-matic" :D

In the end, you #1- will have the last laugh, cuz you'll be able to run cirlces around them, and #2- will have them coming to you seeking advice!!!

And don't forget, any time someone looks at you cross-eyed... we're here, and here you're "normal" :D

[LNdolls]

I bet once I've lost my weight they will be the first ones coming to me asking me how I did it!

That is soooooo true. grin

Best,
LN

[Raw_Medic]

Jo-Anne,
I can completely understand what you're going through. You are much nicer, and the comments suggested are much nicer than I have been. I work in the fire department and basically live with my co-workers 1/3 of my life. We had someone come by our station yesterday. They wanted to know why I didn't try the cotton candy my co-worker made with his cotton candy machine (he has a party supply business and was trying it out). Now no one at my station said anything...they know how I eat, and rarely offer me anything they know I don't eat. But this guy kept going on and on about I could of just had one bite. My co-worker stuck up for me, but he kept going...I got angry. I've had people challenge my diet before, but not in the curious way, but in the way where they tell me that my diet is wrong and they want to argue about it with me. You know those people, the muscle heads that go to the gym all the time and think you need animal protein to be "healthy."

I like to share my lifestyle, but I hate to sit and defend myself, and sometimes I tell people that while, yes, my large salad looks weird to you, you're dead animal, and overprocessed bread has WAY more calories, and WAY less nutrients. Or I just tell them that while they may think my diet is weird, or my fave..."I could never do that." I tell them that I would rather give up meat and processed and cooked foods, and be healthy and thin than to eat crap all day, feel bad, and be overweight.

Closed-mindedness amazes me. Don't let those closed-minded individuals sabatoge all your good work. Remember that leading by example is the best testimonial to the raw diet!

Good luck!

Ursula

[Sharon in Colorado]

Ursula out of curiosity, what did you say to this guy? I just wonder why he couldn't take no for an answer.

[Raw_Medic]

Sharon,
I told him that I simply don't eat that way, of course he said, "Well, you could've had a bite." I told him, "I eat healthy and don't want to put anything un-healthy in my body." when he continued, my co-worker said, "we don't pressure her about what she eats, she does really well, and if she ate anything bad it may make her wanna eat more bad stuff." This seemed to satisfy him...he said he didn't realize how dedicated I was to eating this way.

[Sharon in Colorado]

That was a good answer, yet he kept at you. Seems like there are quite a few prickly people like that, huh?

I think if I knew I was in for it, maybe I'd tell him I don't eat refined sugar. Then he'd be left to guess if I was a diabetic or something and it would shut him up. Good to know for when it happens to me.

It's hard to tell with some people - you never know when they're gonna let up.

Wanted to add what a great friend you had to stick up for you.

[Amberly]

I eat a salad so huge that it can take almost an hour to eat. And then later another and a TON of fruit!! People at work thought I was nuts too. Once or twice I took a whole watermelon half and ate it all. They were amused.

[Jo-anne]

WOW thanks everyone, had no idea others were going through similar situations....I'm just happy to be part of this board, everyone's advice and comments have been awesome and I thank you all.

[TimmyC]

I've had that happen to me.........but I just think about how I was before September. I wasn't mean, but if I had no knowledge of the lifestyle I might think it was strange.


People generally ask for a couple of reasons...one, to falsely make them feel better because their health and weight is bad...they want to make you look bad to bring you down to their level. Secondly, they're really curious. The tone of voice, facial expressions, and over all body language should give most people clues as to what it is. Someone (a friend) asked me a question like that...I was a bit defensive at first, but then they told me the reason they asked was to learn more about what I was doing. My being defensive at first didn't give the raw and living food lifestyle a good image...So from now on, I'm as positive as I can be.

[Gosia]

of my fellow cooked humans. What helps me is remembering how, about 4 years ago, when I heard about raw food diet, I thought that it was totally insane, nutty and wrong. About 6 years ago, I was talking with my friend about her friend, who was eating mostly fruit, and feeding mostly fruit to her children. I thought that that woman was totally crazy. Ha ha ha! OK, I accept the truth now. I am a nutcase. No hard feelings on my part. :p

Cheers to all my fellow nutty raw foodists.
Gosia.

[Jamie]

JoAnne~~~It is so sad how people can be so insensitive!! But think how good you are going to look and then they are going to be coming to you asking how did you do it!!!

I"m glad you had a Large salad,, it helps to stay full and not get tempted by SAD food around you...

Keep up the great work :)

Jamie

[Raw_Medic]

Sharron, You are right...he was a good friend to stick up for me like that. I also think part of the problem with that person who wouldn't let up is that he's known me for quite some many years, but lately we haven't been close...he has no idea what's going on with me, I could've probably gone into more detail with what I eat now...but I didn't feel like it...lol.

Jo-Anne, my Mom's a "Fit for Life"er, she generally does one cooked item a day, although she's been weaning that out. Anyways, she brings all her own foods to work with her, she said that she's been having people look at all the wonderful raw things she's eating for lunch and saying, "you're gonna eat ALL that??" And my wonderful mother has the best come back...she says, "Yes, and when I'm done, if I'm still hungry, I'm gonna have some MORE!" I love it. So simple and to the point...it says, it's really no business of yours what I eat...but in a really nice way. Good luck with your co-workers!

[Raw_Medic]

Cheers to all my fellow nutty raw foodists.
Gosia.

Cheers Gocia! <holding up a nice big glass of green juice> :D

Ursula