Raw during Thanksgiving

[Universal]

Peace to everyone,

I know its still a month and a half away, but the thought is already pondering through my head. I figured i'd present them to the board. This will be my first time being Raw during this "holiday". I personally plan on fasting on this day, for various reasons i don't even need to get into. It's also on a thursday, which is the day of the week that i usually fast on when i do fast.
I just would like to hear other of your experiences when it concerned holidays and being with family and "breaking" the tradition that your family has been following for years.

If i choose not to eat on Thanksgiving, it'll seem so out of place and i don't want my family (my mother in particular) to feel that i'm purposely trying to isolate my Self from the rest of the family. In reality, i'm just looking out for my own health and vitality and taking the necessary personal responsiblity in doing so. However, i don't want to cause an unecessary rift.

For the record, last year during Thanksgiving i was a standard vegetarian, and i had given up meat and most of the SAD lifestyle. That wasn't as much of a challenge since my mother volunteered to cook and cater toward my personal likings, which i HIGHLY respect. I just feel that perhaps this time i may be taking it a little further by fasting.
I don't know. I'm pretty sure most of you here have had similar scenarios played out, i'm just interested to see how you all may have dealt with these situations so i can perhaps better my decision.
Good thing i still got some time.!! (Even though my mother yesterday left a message on my phone wanting me to call her because she wanted to talk to me about Thanksgiving when i come home from school, Go figure!)


PEACE
Universal

[calee]

Hi Universal,

I think it's terrific that you respect your mom and don't want to hurt her feelings. Now is a great time to start talking about how you're eating the health benefits that you're feeling. It's hard for us mom's to argue about health benefits.

For the holidays or other food occasions, I take a huge salad filled with wonderful things. I also take along some raw nuts and some fancy raw dates and other fruits. I load my plate up with salad and when people pass me things, I just look at my plate, smile and say I'm loaded up. No need for a lot of discussion. Keep your plate full, eat slowly and look happy. My friends aren't necessarily raw, but they do eat organic and very healthy so that's not a stretch at all. My son is always delighted to feast on wonderful raw food when he's in town.

Who can resist that? Let us know how you do. I find that if I make a commitment, like in my raw journal, then it's a lot easier to stick to it. I think that our intentions are very powerful. How bout an intention to stay raw on thanksgiving? Oh, and don't forget to take a raw pie or raw torte for dessert! :)

calee

[Sharon in Colorado]

Peace to everyone,

If i choose not to eat on Thanksgiving, it'll seem so out of place and i don't want my family (my mother in particular) to feel that i'm purposely trying to isolate my Self from the rest of the family. In reality, i'm just looking out for my own health and vitality and taking the necessary personal responsiblity in doing so. However, i don't want to cause an unecessary rift.




You've hit the nail on the head here Universal. This is the key!

It's all in the approach. If you are acting like you want to separate youself, then they will see it like that. But if you are just being yourself, enjoying fresh fruits, veggies and salads of what is provided or what you bring, there will be NO problems.

You are an adult, correct? I think sometimes we tend to trap ourselves thinking that we are still being criticized and judged by others if we choose to be different. You can make a choice for yourself and your well-being without having to apologize or hurt anyone's feelings. People's feelings get hurt by themselves, not by you, unless you really make an effort to do so, and then even it's still not your fault.

So however you choose to eat, whether it be raw, cooked or 1/2 & 1/2, or heck, even if you have to fast, do it on your own, without needing anyone's approval.

Last year I made a complete cooked thanksgiving dinner for the family, and then I made a raw turkey recipe from Alissa's book, and 2 raw pies. Well, I ended up having at some of the vegetarian cooked stuff plus the cooked pie. Nobody cared what I did but then I felt horrible afterward. Not guilty, but just completely regretted eating off my plan. I don't want to do that again this year! I wish I could tell all the people trying to stay raw through Tahnksgiving not to, but I can't, I can only control what I do.

Nobody has to go home with you but you. When we appear before our relatives, it is for a short time to gather with our loved ones, and then we go back home.

When there is guilt, fear, anger, questioning etc. about our actions, it is not us doing it, it is them. So try not to make yourself responsible for the way other people react to what you decide to do.

(and if you ARE fasting, maybe you can help serve the food, so you aren't sitting there with nothing on your plate - unless you decide to eat fruit and at least that way your plate is full)

I hope that helped! :)

[vanc]

Dear Universal,

I had the same concerns this past weekend for a simple family dinner. I brought Alissa's Stuffed Portobello Mushrooms (I used smaller ports rather than one large-to share of course), Marinara with Zucchini Noodles, and Banana Ice Cream with Strawberry Sauce. A green salad was present on the table that my bro in law made. I was covered! Appetizer, salad, main course, and dessert. Offer your mom to bring a raw dish despite your fasting for the day. Moms always want to make sure their little one's are fed. The nurturing will never go away. As a mom of 4 little one's (5-12) I am sure I will always want to make sure they are eating. The healthier the better too. Alissa has so many good recipes there is even a Noasted Turkey recipe that tastes like traditional stuffing. Good luck with your holiday. Happy Thanksgiving!

[rawpriestess]

We've tried several different things with Thanksgiving, and we have finally decided that it is best for everyone if Dragggon and I spend out Thanksgiving together as our "new" family tradition.

This way, we don't experience the cooked foods, or any temptations there might be, we don't have to get asked uncomfortable questions, or come up with explanations, we don't have to do anything, but totaly enjoy the company we have chosen for our own personal celebration, each other.

We are very thankful that we can simply tell our families that we have chosen to have a very intimate Thanksgiving together, and that we will be happy to come and visit them some other time.

This is what is our choice, and it works, there is never any discomfort around this personal choice. no explanations, no worries, no strange questions, no one to bother us, no temptations, no nothing, just raw food bliss, with the one I love.

[sweetgoddess]

I am doing what RawPriestess is doing and just hanging at home with my family this year. It will be wonderful and we are making a raw feast, yhough I offered to make them whatever they wanted.


There are so many great responses in this thread. Its neat to see everyone planning ahead like this! I hope you all have a wonderful, love-filled day of Thanksgiving!

RawPriestess- I searched Victoria's site and can't find anything about certifications. I would love to know about this, as I really liked her when I saw her. Where can I find the info?

Blessings~
Carmel

[ReneeSC]

This will be my first set of holy-days raw.
My family has agreed to do the dinner party raw/predominantly so, but they've not agreed to totally raw Thanksgiving/Christmas.

I know I'll be unbaking/uncandy making - but I've yet to make even the faux chicken nuggets ( will! ).

My husband understands I wish not to cook meat anymore - so if they want it, he makes it... I just find it hard to fathom my family doing the "cooking" - and.. I'll.......... do what?

There's always raw pumpkin pie ( can't wait for that! ) - which I'll adapt out of Alissa's carrot cake recipe ( which, btw, is fab! and I was carrot cake officienado around here ).
We "could" instead - go out to eat on Thanksgiving. That way they can have whatever they'd like ( mom will not fuss ) - and I can have whatever I want ( and they won't fuss ).

We don't live anywhere near family - haven't in, oh, 13 years, so that's not a concern, but if we were asked to someone's house, I wouldn't mind going as long as I can bring raw food and eat it instead of cooked.

My daughters have said last month: "But Moooooooom!!!! What about Thanksgiving and Christmas??? You always cook for days - we eat so much! What are we going to do? Oh!!! It'll be so BOR-ING!"

I was miffed - whoooo - was I miffed! My first month challenge, during refined carbohydrate detox, was _not_ the time to bring this up to me. LOL

My husband said, "C'mon Renee, it's Thanksgiving and Christmas. Can't you just lay off for two days?.. C'mon.. what's the big deal?"

I just stood there incredulous. Mouth open. Staring at them.

"Look" I said "We'll cross this bridge when we get to it, okay? i don't want to discuss this right now - I can't, and you're upsetting me."

"Upsetting you!" says my husband "Why are we upsetting YOU? You're the one changing everything! There are holidays. We're SUPPOSED to celebrate with FOOD! That's what it's all about!"

"No, that's NOT what it is _all_ about. That's PART of it. Yeah, I can understand how you feel, Bryan, ... you and I come from half Italian families..and all they DID was EAT! We can still EAT, just different things."

"Awwww... man!" says the oldest daughter "You're going to make us eat VEGEABLES for Christmas! What about candy? What about pie.. What about mashed protatoes???"

( that was from my once-binging child - who has since lost 30 lbs and looks absolutlely beautiful )

That's what I had to fight about almost every day last month. ( same story - different day or holiday.. or some scenario )

They're coming around. I'm ordering a Vegetable turkey ( no soy/tofu ) - and eating that myself if I have to. :) They'll not lack good, raw things to eat.

[rawpriestess]

Sweetgoddess,

I haven't seen it on her sight, it was a 5 week class in 2001, where she and the entire family drove up each weekend to teach in Seattle on Saturday and Olympia on Sunday, at the end of the class we received our Gourmet Raw chef certification. You could take either class, but I ended up taking 3 in Seattle and 2 in Olympia because of previous engagements.

It wasn't expensive at all, and it was the best class I have ever taken, it was basically her 12 steps to raw foods info, plus tons of food prep information, the entire family worked on the info about food prep, and Victoria lectured, and had lots of questions, there was a lot of interaction. We had the most wonderful foods I'd ever experienced, banana ice cream with hot fudge sauce, lasagna, portabella mushroom burgers, the only dehydrated food was Igor's crackers, all the other foods, were fresh, ripe, raw and living.

They were actually shooting her videos at the class, so I imagine, she doesn't teach these classes anymore, just sells the tapes, I don't know if you can still get her certification or not.

It lasted about 4 hours each time we went, maybe a little longer.

The class was huge about 50 people in each group. Mostly the Seattle raw community, and they are pretty tight and there is alot of them.

I was brand new to raw, so didn't even know what questions to ask, I bought so many books and things, got my Excalibur from her, and my saladacco, which both still work perfectly.

Bought several books, (all of hers) although I think she only had 12 steps to raw at the time, and Paul Nisons, "the Raw life" which I promptly sent to my son after reading it, all that prize fighting stuff was silly to me, but my son liked it.--Guys -- LOL

and learned a ton of raw stuff.

I must say that I much prefere Alissa's recipes though, as they are much closer to SAD, as far as a transition phase.

Now, that I've been raw a while, I like to eat more simply, but in those first few months, I could have used Alissa'a book.

so, all you newbies, be thankful you have this board and her book and DVD, boy could I have used that all those years ago. LOL

SG, I'd just write Victoria, I know she is much more busy than she was back then, you used to be able to call her, but I've emailed her recently and she did get back to me the same day.

[sweetgoddess]

Thanks for the info RP. I thought maybe I was missing a page on their rawfamily site.
I thought you had just been certified, since you just added that to your signature line this week. The timing just blew me away.
I much prefer Alissa's food also. I would never have been able to change so many habits and emotional patterns and made this a permanent change were it not for Living on Live Food. It is just so different, brighter, Yummier and so real.
Not as spartan as a lot of the other raw theories and it's truly changed my life in a doable way. I got to eat her calzone last week and OMG! Sweet Heaven!
I loved meeting Victoria in Seattle, it seems she has a bond with that city. awwww I miss Seattle.....I miss washington..everytime I hear Seattle now it pulls on my heart strings..LOL

Rennee~ wow. Please let us know what you end up doing. That sounds like a challenge but I am sure it will work out.
Awww theres a baby deer in front of my window as I type this.
Bambi says hi!

[sweetgoddess]

Universal, I am sure your mother just wants that bond of love, on a day when we all have hearts full of gratitude for those very bonds. If you decide to fast for the day, that shouldnt be the spotlight at all, really. Gratitude for the family and all the blessings shared together or apart, is truly the focus. And if the spotlight should wander, just bring up gratitude-for your health, your family, their support and love.

Since your mom has respected your choices in the past, I am sure she will again, especially if it is clear there is no threat to celebrating family and blessings.

This year, I asked my husband and daughter for their input on what we could do together. I explained that I want them to have what makes their hearts warm and fuzzy, but that I dont think I can, at this point, cook meat etc. They supported that entirely. So Renee, maybe your family can come up with alternatives together, that way each person will have a chance to think it over and even reflect on the purpose of the celebration. Sort of ask for their help inventing some new rituals to celebrate! Hopefully, they will suprise you with their creative ideas!

[Sharon in Colorado]

Thanks Sweet G. That gives me an idea to sit down with the family and discuss this.

My DH still isn't in that place - although he supports me 100% and probably eats a good portion of raw, he still would desire that traditional meal with all the trimmings.

Last year I went and made 2 raw pies - pecan and butternut and compared to the cooked one, it didn't taste anywhere as good. So I may just scrap the pies and make Alissa's Black Forest Cake which is very rich and wonderful. Then I'll do a huge salad and fruit as an appetizer and cut down on the main course instead of doing it up. But I will discuss this with the family first.

Renee have you thought about doing that, having a calm discussion with everyone? The thought did cross my mind that if your famiy's been raw with you this whole time, someone might get sick after eating a traditional Thanksgiving meal.

[yeahbethany]

Universal,
I know this may not exactly be what you want to hear, but as an experienced raw/vegetarian, I feel the need to put this out there.

Please, reconsider fasting on Thanksgiving. Two reasons.

1. You are very likely to feel deprived, and resentful watching everyone else eat.

2. You are reinforcing the message everyone there will want to hear: "See, raw is so weird, you can't even eat on Thanksgiving, what a BORING, ANTI-SOCIAL life style it is, I TOTALLY can't relate!" Which is the opposite of what you want to do, isn't it? Ideally, you need to create a warm, enjoyable atmosphere, and show everyone, "hey, I still enjoy food, even if it is different!" You need to show them that you can relate to them, even if you eat differently now.

My suggestion: Make raw food! Something you will enjoy, and Enough to share! Bring it with you! Let people know that they are welcome to try it, but don't push it on them if they refuse. Other than that, do NOT talk about your diet, even if asked. If a person seems like they really want to know, tell them you will e-mail them some info. Make the gathering about the family and friends, and not the food.

Some food suggestions: Portabello mushrooms stuffed with walnut pate, served with gravy and cranberry sauce. Caesar salad. Marinated Vegetables. Cauliflower mashed potatoes. Apple or pecan pie. Fresh, seasonal fruit platter (like persimmons, grapes, figs, oranges, etc). Any or all of these that appeal to you.

Last Thanksgiving, we visited my family in New Jersey. We made savory sage croquettes, cranberry sauce, kale salad, fennel salad, apple pie, pecan pie, cauliflower mashed potatoes with gravy.

For Christmas, we went to visit Matt's family in Ohio. We made less food then, but still enough to be satisfied! They had a SAD meal - ham, mashed potatoes, noodles, brocolli and cawliflower that were boiled to death, brownies, pies, etc. They put out a bunch of cut up veggies to be nice to us, and we brought along some great food to share: Pesto stuffed mushrooms, Raw lasagna, spinach salad with hazelnuts and pears, apple pie, and fudge brownies.

This year, my dad is coming to see us. It will just be the three of us. I'm going to make stuffed portabellos with gravy, some kind of yummy salad, fresh seasonal fruit, and some kind of dessert. Maybe other things but I'm not sure.

Let me know if this advice is helpful. I don't mean to be a jerk and invalidate your decision to fast. Your decision is just that - YOURS, and if you still want to, I totally respect that. However, I just wanted you to consider these outcomes first. Either way, please have a JOYFUL and ABUNDANT holiday =).

[Universal]

Peace yeahbethany,

I definitely have strongly considered those outcomes and went over all of those possibities in my head. It's surely something extra to ponder over.

Last night i spoke to my mother and she asked again about Thanksgiving and i told her two things i was considering. Either 1, fasting. or 2, getting a good Raw Food Recipe book and pick out which ones i'd wanna try and preparing them during the day. So the choice will be mine to make as to whether i go with option 1 or 2.
I definitely won't have to worry about feeling any resentment watching others eat. I go through that every day!! I got enough practice with that.
I never EVER try to force my way of eating on anyone. I'm usually just asked one (or other times bombarded) with questions about the way i eat, and as time has progressed my answers are getting simpler and simpler and simpler.

Thanks to you as well as everyone else for the responses. A lotta great replies, indeed!

Now i just need a raw cookbook, and my goodness at the Whole Foods Market, and online as well, there are just so many! And right now i don't have a dehydrator. Perhaps, i'll go with Alissa's book. Are there any other Raw Recipe cooks that i should consider???
And does anyone know of the best deals for a functionable dehydrator???

Thanks again for so much input.

PEACE
Universal

[yeahbethany]

Raw Food Made Easy for One or two people by Jennifer Cornbleet is a good one - no dehydrating required! =)

[Universal]

Excellent. I've copied it down.
Thanks a lot yeahbethany!

[yeahbethany]

You're welcome! Glad to help! =)

[lodestar]

ok girls...here is the thing I am struggling with.

For the last two Thanksgivings I made traditional dinners for my family and ate raw..which was ok for everyone and I did feel thankful.

Off and on throughout the year I have imagined eating that cooked food with my family this year. So here's the complication. For whatever reason I feel the urge to go 100% once again and I don't want to take a one day break for the holidays and mess up all of the progress made...I don't regroup and bounce back very well when I deviate.

Honestly I wish the desire and motivation will be as strong then as it is now. Wish me luck.

[sweetgoddess]

I wish you so much luck. What will you be making yourself then? I hope it is something special. You deserve it :)

[ReneeSC]

[
Renee have you thought about doing that, having a calm discussion with everyone? The thought did cross my mind that if your famiy's been raw with you this whole time, someone might get sick after eating a traditional Thanksgiving meal.[/QUOTE]

No, the're not where I am with food. If they start going through a detox, they become frightened and try to run for something. I've told them every single day what was happening, but.... sometimes they'lll listen, sometimes they won't.

I've "calm'd", I've cajoled, I've begged, pleaded, and threw up my hands -
They know how their bodies feel when they eat things they're not supposed to. I've just come to the place where I'll say something if I want to, other times I have let them withstand the reactions of their own bodies so they can see if for themselves.

Calm discussion has nothing to do with it around here - they weren't listening no matter what was said and how. They've now seen with their own eyes and felt with their own bodies. There's no better testimony than that for themselves, so they've led me to believe.

[Sharon in Colorado]

Renee it sounds like we are in the same spot. It may not be so bad to make them an organic turkey, with healthier cooked option.

Last year I got a small turkey breast from a health food store, and used a healthy type of stuffing. You might have to compromise here to keep the monsters calm, lol.

[ReneeSC]

[QUOTE=Sharon in Colorado]Renee it sounds like we are in the same spot. It may not be so bad to make them an organic turkey, with healthier cooked option.
________-----


LOL@ monsters..

I agree organic would be optimum( outside of raw ) and thankfully my husband is learning to love organic. The more I tell him how much safer it is, how much more nutrition it's been tested to have over conventional, the more he realizes he really needs this.

The problem I have with him ( love him though I do - and as helpfull as he truly is )- he gives in to the children. I won't - well, not nearly as much as he. He says he doesn't know why he does it. ( LOL ) I know WHY.. cuz he's wrapped... that's why... all the way around their fingers. :)

We have to come up with something -.. ya know.. NEW traditions... BETTER ones.