Please suggest some ways to respond to this...

[joyce09]

I just started to take part in a nice group who gather together once weekly for dinner and a serious study of some subjects. The dinner is generally pot luck of cooked dishes. I contributed a fresh fruit bowl and just ate from my own fruit bowl. Some nice people asked me why I just ate of my own fruit. How should I respond? I had said, "I am not hungry." " I already had something." But that would appear lame in the long run.

By the way, I am not interested in preparing more complicated raw dishes/salads for this group. (Just preparing raw dishes for me/my hubby is already getting too much for me.) A fresh fruit bowl is all that I am willing to contribute. And I am not interested in talking this group into raw healthy eating.

[Mary Kay]

I would just be truthful and tell them you eat only (or mostly- whatever you do) raw food. You don't have to teach them/talk them into anything. If they're interested and you just don't have the energy to try to answer all their questons etc, just suggest to them they google raw foods, then quickly turn the conversation back to the subject being discussed.

Why hide it? That's you.

Mary Kay

[kaleboy]

perhaps one of the discussions can be on the topic of the raw food lifestyle or just the lack of fruit and vegetables in the modern American diet, then after that if they see you munching on some fruit they will understand :)

[RawSar]

ALLERGIES

you have many many allergies

I'm allergic to everything :dance:

[Aleesha Sattva]

are you allergic to everything sar? cause i am.

i would just say it's what you like to eat for dinner. you prefer a light raw dinner and leave it at that. simple and easy.

[RawSar]

are you allergic to everything sar? cause i am.


I think breakouts on my skin and migraines are allergic reactions from dairy.
Meat is just so revolting that I won't have it my house EVER.. makes me sick just thinking about it - allergic reaction
When I get 'silly' from having a drink - this is an allergic reaction especially the side effects I get the next day
Gluten allergy I'm pretty sure I had, my sister has been recently diagnosed, her symptoms sound a lot like what I had, but I thought it was normal ...O_O
Mood swings from candies - allergic reaction
"Betcha can't eat just one", chips.. definitely an allergic reaction, you really can't just have one
Fluoride I'm pretty sure is in everyone's water, but mine, I'm pretty sure I'm allergic to THAT chemical

what else do other people eat and drink.... whatever it is I'm probably allergic lol


"No thank you" repeatedly comes out of my mouth

[Aleesha Sattva]

i had allergy tests (http://www.rawfoodtalk.com/showthread.php?t=63698) and found out that if it's not raw... i'm allergic to it. scary to think i was putting my body through that for years :( i'm sooo glad i found raw!

[RawSar]

i had allergy tests (http://www.rawfoodtalk.com/showthread.php?t=63698) and found out that if it's not raw... i'm allergic to it. scary to think i was putting my body through that for years :( i'm sooo glad i found raw!

Wow, you really are allergic to everything. Too bad about the strawberries :(
I have not had any tests done.
I just don't think that putting in any of that in my body is going to do a good thing.

[proteus]

i fail to see the problem with telling the truth.

[Jeannie]

It is soooo weird how some people think you have lost it when you say you only eat raw.. You may as well say you eat dog or cat... similar reaction from some.... I just don't get it though, have we been so programmed (and I almost want to go as far as saying- brainwashed), into believing that everything needs to be cooked to death? Traditions, tv cooking shows... etc etc

Who cares though... I just ignore the eye rolling of my colleages when I eat my raw asparagus and focus on the lovely flavour and the amazing health benefits of my lunch!
I think it weird to cook food... :LOL:

[DawnD]

I would just tell them you eat only raw and then discuss it as much or as little as you want. I have had some pretty interesting conversations that way. I do try to smuggle my green smoothies. Last week I got caught with one and the guy asked me if I was drinking a green smoothie. I was shocked then had a great conversation with him.

[scyn]

Sometimes I find that with people I don't know too well, it's easier to respond to the question with: "It's an experiment". What that seems to do is to externalise my dietary choices so that it can be spoken about just like the weather is spoken about. Some people get quite put off when the word 'I' is used all the time -'I' eat this way because...; 'I' feel different because...etc.

Then I can talk about raw food in a context which might be more applicable / acceptable by those in the discussion - be it nutrition, environment, children, optimal functioning etc. If people are interested and the discussion continues then it does inevitably boil down to my personal choices and experiences of eating in a particular way, but by them getting to this point through their own inquisitive questioning - the personal experience is no longer threatening.

[scyn]

Post deleted - it wasn't really relevant.

(Can entire posts be deleted?)

[Reesh]

Sometimes I find that with people I don't know too well, it's easier to respond to the question with: "It's an experiment". What that seems to do is to externalise my dietary choices so that it can be spoken about just like the weather is spoken about. Some people get quite put off when the word 'I' is used all the time -'I' eat this way because...; 'I' feel different because...etc.

Then I can talk about raw food in a context which might be more applicable / acceptable by those in the discussion - be it nutrition, environment, children, optimal functioning etc. If people are interested and the discussion continues then it does inevitably boil down to my personal choices and experiences of eating in a particular way, but by them getting to this point through their own inquisitive questioning - the personal experience is no longer threatening.

That's a great way to put it, because it definitely comes up in conversation at work once in a while. It doesn't feel like "a thing" to me at all, but I know it would be perceived that way in conversation by most. To me, I'm just eating what I want to be eating and it's all fresh and delicious and nutritious. I don't lament, I don't even feel like I'm 'avoiding' all the stuff I don't eat.

[joyce09]

Many thanks for the input by everyone. I feel I am getting great support here which is strengthening me to face the lack of support in the cooked world.

[Raw Angel Mom]

Also i want to add that people will get use to you only having fruit. Make sure you eat a lot before going to that potluck. Education yourself on raw food in case the topic comes up.

You will be fine, enjoy your time with your friends

p.s You could also say that you don't eat heavy meal past 5pm only fruits.

[proteus]

you people are silly. an individual doesn't need to justify his actions to anybody.

[scyn]

you people are silly. an individual doesn't need to justify his actions to anybody.You've missed the point. It's not about justifying ones actions; its about been able to engage in discussion in a way which leads to both parties benefiting from the discussion. Responding to the question: "Why do you only eat fruit", by saying: "I don't have to justify my actions" is not really helping to generate an interesting & beneficial conversation, is it? :no:

[kaleboy]

There is also the view that if she does speak up some of the group may feel threatened by her healthy ways and will try to undermine and ostracise her, especially given that the meetings revolve around dinner cooked by the participants. It may sound extreme but in general you'll find that the heard mentallity is threatened by anything that goes against its mainstream ways of thought.

[proteus]

It may sound extreme but in general you'll find that the heard mentallity is threatened by anything that goes against its mainstream ways of thought.

oh i am well aware of that. i just don't care. i'm not going to lie just to make somebody happy.

[kaleboy]

well we're probably a bit off topic lol but sometimes you have to lie unless you are a purest and dont mind going up in flames :)

"It is claimed that as many as 200,000 people were burned for witchcraft in Europe in 16th and 17th centuries."

[January Noir]

I'd just tell the truth. If they want to find out more about your food and how you eat, tell them. If their questions make you uncomfortable (which it shouldn't) tell them you'll be happy to share "at length" another time.

My family and co-workers were curious when I first started out 7 months ago. Now they're used to how I eat and could care less! It may also be because I don't make a big deal of it. I bring enough of my food and offer to share and usually, they eat and enjoy.

[mcster]

oh i am well aware of that. i just don't care. i'm not going to lie just to make somebody happy.

I fully agree with you but I also think you might be missing the point. It's not about lying. It's about being diplomatic. Going around asserting your beliefs to people who don't get you is a pretty good way to become a social outcast. There's nothing wrong with that but some people would prefer to continue engaging socially while still being able to pursue their unconventional choices. So it really is just looking for the right way to frame it...communicating what it is without threatening others.

I like the "experiment" explanation. Isn't everything we do in life an experiment?

[proteus]

I fully agree with you but I also think you might be missing the point. It's not about lying. It's about being diplomatic. Going around asserting your beliefs to people who don't get you is a pretty good way to become a social outcast. There's nothing wrong with that but some people would prefer to continue engaging socially while still being able to pursue their unconventional choices. So it really is just looking for the right way to frame it...communicating what it is without threatening others.

I like the "experiment" explanation. Isn't everything we do in life an experiment?

fine, this is not a philosophy forum so i'll let it slide.

[Revvell]

well we're probably a bit off topic lol but sometimes you have to lie unless you are a purest and dont mind going up in flames :)


I would change your wording to say "Sometime "I" have to lie....".... you seem to be speaking for others when you say "you".

I'm with Proteus. (Anyone surprised?) :D

[snoops]

LOL @ Rev!!!:ROFL:

[Revvell]

*pokes da pup* :D :heart:

[joyce09]

The discussion is interesting and educational. Every person reveals a unique personality. Surely the human scene is very lovely.:fruitline:

[I_am_there]

I foresee this coming up -lots- and it did previously when I was doing raw. People love to be social with food and part of my job is having those "social times".

For the next six weeks my response is this, "For my 35th birthday I gave myself the present of having a raw food coach for six weeks." People are pretty used to me being out of the box and this is a fun way to tell them what I'm doing without tying in any longwinded things about health and so ons. So I -definitely- get why you don't wish to have the discussion about it as well.

Quite honestly, my job requires teaching and I'm a single mom of six children that talk lots and lots and lots.. I really don't have the "oomph" to discuss the ins and outs of raw food every time I turn down something. When a simple, "No thank you" won't work, I will be using my birthday reason.

[Aleesha Sattva]

i loooooove your birthday reason. what a beautiful way to express it! :hug

[k8sl8]

I just started to take part in a nice group who gather together once weekly for dinner and a serious study of some subjects. The dinner is generally pot luck of cooked dishes. I contributed a fresh fruit bowl and just ate from my own fruit bowl. Some nice people asked me why I just ate of my own fruit. How should I respond? I had said, "I am not hungry." " I already had something." But that would appear lame in the long run.

By the way, I am not interested in preparing more complicated raw dishes/salads for this group. (Just preparing raw dishes for me/my hubby is already getting too much for me.) A fresh fruit bowl is all that I am willing to contribute. And I am not interested in talking this group into raw healthy eating.

Sometimes HOW you say you are "eating raw" is enough to discourage conversation (This is how I perceive your lack of interest in converting your group). Don't apologize either in tone or content or it may encourage the other person to question you. Be ready with your simple reply and go on to ask the other person a question to move the subject on to something else.

Even if you are not interested in gourmet dishes, you could alternate between a fruit salad and a nice green or mixed veggie salad. It will get easier and depending on what is at the market, a veg. salad is often a less expensive alternative for a group.