SAD friend staying the weekend...

[AdrienneD]

Hello all,

I've read threads on this before so I thought I would have my mind prepared for it, but today I am stressing over it a bit. Hubby and I are each having a friend stay the weekend with us for a little Halloween get-together. My girlfriend that's coming is a veggie at least, and she's very supportive of my RAW lifestyle, but hubby's friend..sheesh.

He's the type of guy that HAS to be right at all costs, he'll even completely make something up if he thinks it will sound true enough to "prove" his point. He doesn't know I'm RAW, nor even vegan. He IS however under some impression that the only way I lost the weight I did last year was from severly restricting myself (SO not true). He is also the SADest person you could imagine, I swear he lives on energy drinks and processed lunchmeat..

There will be a bit of alcohol, for him and hubby, us girls don't drink thankfully. But that will probably make him a bit more argumentative.

I know I need to just tough this out, and in no way will I be giving in to SAD things (hubby is going to be making dinner/snacks at least and he's pretty healthy), but ARGH. I really want to spend the weekend nicely rather than warring with this man! To make matters worse, this is surprisingly the first time we'll have had people staying over since we've lived together..for years and years...just not very social I suppose?

So..I'll be spending my weekend biting my tongue and trying to remember that I CAN'T walk around naked all I want lol how weird it will be to actually have to close the door when changing or having shower. You all must think we're so odd now lol

anyone have some little tips to keep sane?

- Adrienne

[katchmoleen]

And where is hubby while all this is going on? This is HIS friend and it is HIS job to shield you from his jerkiness, IMHO.
I personally would not engage. Just have all kinds of really good food around and don't even bring it up. If HE brings it up, you could say, "This is a fun weekend, I am not up for an argument. Anyone for more brownies and ice creme?? How about some Rawritoes and dip? Or try my amazing spiced nuts? Anyone anyone?"

[joya]

I would suggest just going with the flow and enjoying yourself and your company. I would prepare some delicious raw food dishes to share that have some universal appeal. Perhaps some desserts. Don't even mention that they are raw! In fact, I wouldn't put too much attention and emphasis on food in general. Just do you thing and be happy!

If this man wants to start an arguement, well, it's your home and I would hope he would know better than to act like an arse to his hostess. Try not to anticipate negativity. And, personally, I'd have some cooked for goodies to offer your guests too... doesn't have to be SAD... you can still find healthy/organic more "traditional" American food... so even if he is going to eat cooked, he'll be eating a more healthy version of it.

Just my 2 cents. Have fun!!!

[Veganforlife]

Ignore him and his comments. He's ignorant to the goodness of living and eating well, obviously. Just have fun with YOUR friend that respects you.

[Raw Angel Mom]

I totally hear you. The good news this is only for the weekend. If you feel guided to share your experience, go for it, if not, just let him be right in his head, lol... I don't argue with people, i always say what matter is to be happy and this food really hit the spot for me. If he is happy with his food, then this is what matter at the end.

I work with people like this and after a few years putting up with me, they are coming around, lol... yes, i stand my ground and have compassion instead. Insecurities or fear of the new can offer resistance to this life style, but as people see us over time, they cannot denial that this work. They don't know that i do raw food, they think that i am vegan only. I am tease that i do celery stick and won't last long etc.... But i don't look my age :rolleyes: Your look and your energy cannot denial facts about your diet. More and more people notice and ask me question about what i do.

I wish you well and have fun, don't worry about him. See him as a practice. If you can manage with him, you will manage with anyone, lol....

[T-Bird]

And where is hubby while all this is going on? This is HIS friend and it is HIS job to shield you from his jerkiness, IMHO.


Yep!

just let DH know that you don't want to discuss this with his opinionated friend and that you will rely on him to curtail any acrimonious discussions at the get go.

[DopeRawAbundance]

One lil problemo is that you're kinda expectin' the worst... you thinking mad beef is gonna go down will keep it lingering in your conscience, and eventually ripple into a diet showdown materializing.

Kinda sorta be water... like Bruce Lee. Don't expect anything, just take it moment to moment, focus on now and not the future. Dude might turn out to be a chill guy, I done seen it happen.

[laura-jane]

Ahh! Why would you have people over who are jerks??

I am very selective about the people I let into my house and my life. They don't have to be raw, but they can't be jerks!

Good luck! I'm sure it'll be fine, but you really must meet more like-minded people!

[Green_Woman]

I know how difficult it can be to have "problem" people in your life, but I do have a little slice of advise coming from someone who is SURROUNDED by naysayers.

Don't PROJECT a negative weekend, or that's what you will get.

Remember... thoughts become things.

This week I've already had 3 SAD eaters come up to me either asking me questions about RAW foods so they could try them, or wanting to tell me they had tried a Green Smoothie after reading my website and LOVED it!!! You NEVER know whose brick wall you will chip. ;)

[AdrienneD]

THANK YOU to EVERYONE who replied!

I'm glad I posted this now.

And you're all right, I am projecting negativity for this weekend. I tend to over think situations and get a wee too worked up over them.

Since last night hubby and I have talked over it a little bit. He'll try to curb his friend if he gets out of hand in anyway, so that will help. AND reminded me I'll have my veggie friend, who will gladly fight for my opinions with me when it comes to animal products haha

I'm just going to think of all the fun we'll have and just be CALM. I am just finished off a huge container of green juice..and I am feeling pretty good on just about everything haha

He's going to be here tonight a bit earlier, so he gets to come on our grocery trip. Perhaps I shall simply wow him on our healthy shopping routine??!?!? Yes yes??

Thank you everyone!

- Adrienne