View Full Version : Feeling Lost!!
05-15-2009, 01:18 AM
I've gravitated slowly but surely to the raw food lifestyle, and have so many wonderful, wonderful things to say about it! But, as an attempt to help me become MORE raw, and also to help lose some much needed weight, I got on the master cleanse for 10 days. I have a background of bulimia and other unhealthy ways of self-harm. I've struggled with my weight as long as I can remember. I lost about 15 pounds on the master cleanse, and I stopped on 10 days instead of when my tongue turned pink (a way of making sure you were done detoxing). I wasn't done detoxing at ALL. Not close. But I still got off, and almost immediately went to cooked foods!! It's been over a week since off the cleanse, and I've eaten mostly cooked, junk food the whole time! I feel so ashamed and I've let myself down. I feel as if I have so many addictions I need to break in my life and being RAW really empowers me to overcome other challenges. I've attempted 3 times to start to the master cleanse again but my hunger and my negative attitude tells me it's okay to eat anything. I'm thinking maybe I need more time OFF the cleanse before I get on, but I'm really just a wreck because of what I'm doing to myself now.
This is becoming more psychological and I'm trying to find the strength to pull myself up. Is anyone else like this? Any suggestions? Raw food is THE ANSWER for me in so many ways, but it's very hard to get back up after being down for too long!! I'm usually not like this at all but very strong and on my own at all things.
Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thanks guys!
05-15-2009, 02:21 AM
Have you purchased Alissa's Book, Living on Live Food and DVD ?
05-15-2009, 02:51 AM
No ma'am I surely have not. I have several other books on raw-food and try to keep myself well educated on what cooked food does to the body.
05-15-2009, 02:55 AM
What I have found is adding green juices -fruit and veggie juice, or green smoothies is a great way to come out of a downward spiral. Don't go back to the MC now.. you ended that cleanse and can do another in 3-4 months. Meanwhile.. add lots of greens in everything you can. They make a huge difference in moods and choices of food.
05-15-2009, 03:55 AM
First of all, i want to give you a big hug. With all that self harm in your background you deserve all the love ever possible! It is possible to break old patterns, the past is in the past and what lies ahead is new and will be whatever you make of it.
Second, i wonder why you keep struggling with the master cleanse if you seem to have such problems with it every time? Perhaps it is just not right for you at this moment? Ask yourself these questions, and try to feel what you need right now, instead of intellectually making up a plan on what you "should" do.
Even though i have only been on the raw diet for about two weeks i am a firm believer that it is the best way to heal a negative self image. I have had so many times when i have looked into the mirror and cried because i hated what i saw so much, I have had an eating disorder and i almost started cutting myself in the past. I have come a long way now, but still it was not long ago i cried after looking in the mirror. That's how low my self esteem was.
However: I just noticed that during these two weeks i have not had ONE negative thought about my body. Not ONCE have o looked in the mirror disapprovingly. All of that has flown away.
That alone for me is proof that a lifestyle of no boundaries, no limits, no counting and no control is the right one.
And yes it is hard, it is a struggle in the beginning and it's a struggle along the way for many of us, that's just the truth. But all i can say is: eat more raw. It's as simple as that. Eat more raw. You will feel better, you will begin a postivie circle and you have the power to break all the negative patterns in your life.
Let go, loose control, cut out the corrective behaviour and just eat more raw foods, and you will heal.
05-15-2009, 06:13 AM
Pretty much what springtime said (I love it when people do that, saves all the typey typey).
Just wanted to chime in and give my support too.
JUST RELAX, yes really! You will find it so much easier. NEVER beat yourself up, you have done so much of that in the past, I think you deserve better.
Why not just try to gently move more toward raw than the master cleanse for now. Enjoy the tastes of good fresh food and just gently ease yourself back in if this is the easiest way for you.
Often detox is an ongoing process, and often it's best done in gradual stages to help both your body and your mind adjust. People can go on detoxing for YEARS, so try not to expect too much at once. There are no true quick fixes, just temporary bandaids that mask the problem for a while.
Let your body heal in its own good time darls!
Now take a deep breath, and go and eat some lovely fruit and veg. :)
05-15-2009, 06:15 AM
Dear chantanoog, cleansing seems to bring out the deep emotional stuff fairly quickly.
Raw foods are a cleansing process as well as a rejuvenation. These are gradual although some changes happen quickly. It gives your body time to gradually release what needs releasing without a quick evacuation of all that has gone before. This might have thrown you into what you are experiencing.
Also MC might have been perceived by your body(for you right now) as deprivation, given the history you mentioned...more of the same you see. So when you go off the cleanse, the body asks to catch up and wants it all!!!!
The raw life is a life of adding not taking away!
Sweet, love yourself. Go to the store and pick out the most luscious looking fruits you can find. Pick up what speaks to you. Make gorgeous fruit smoothies. Green smoothies are key for balance and cravings. Yet fruit ones sometimes is a real treat and feel so good.
Go to a rest. if you can and eat a gorgeous raw meal. Make something and attend a raw potluck and sample wonderful foods.
Be nice for you to be raw AND feel good being it.Make how you choose raw to be ok just how it is. Listen to your body and give it what it asks for.
If I could give you one gift, raw food aside(haha) it would be the ability to SEE who you really are. What a gift your life is, all you are as a child of God.
How you (as well as everyone) has the divine right to love and be loved. And love yourself. Life is so very good and you can learn to take care of you and love it. Blessings to you. We are here for you.
05-15-2009, 06:37 AM
What's already been said here has been fantastic!
The limiting, negative thoughts you're having aren't yours, don't worry, it's just the mind. You are not those thoughts, you are not this body, and you certainly aren't this mind. You are as Colorawdo said a luminescent child of God, divine in your own right, deserving of the very best in radiant health, love and light. Raw food is one way of giving yourself this gift, dark leafy greens are incredible healers, and fruits amazing sustainer's of vibrancy and life. The more vibrant your food, the more vibrant you'll be. Raw feeds the body and soul with light, high vibrations.
You are already perfect, shining bright, sometimes we forget to dust ourselves off and let our light be covered, but we're still shining within. So get back up, dust yourself off and let your light shine. You've got it within you! Wishing you all the best, in life, love and Raw!
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