Making It Hard!

[ShelShel]

Do any of you ever experience this? I have had a great day raw. :rolleyes: My first in months and months. My hubby gets home and wants to know if he can take me to dinner (alone...by ourselves...us time) at Pizza Hut. :eek: I can't tell you how much I hated saying the words...I've actually been raw all day. I've done really good. :( This made me sooooo sad. I wanted to go and have more than a toss salad. Enjoy a good meal...hot coffee...conversation. How do you guys deal with times and moments like these? (He won't go if I'm getting a salad. He feels like he's eating alone. I don't blame him. Have you ever eaten a pizza in front of a dieter...it's no picnic. I'm not at the stage of saying I'm completely enjoying what I'm eating...it's like torture for me right now.)

So...what would you do? Go to dinner...enjoy and go back to raw tomorrow? Or would you stick to your guns...go and have salad or not go at all?

[SmilingRawDancer]

Well, for me, I would go and eat a salad. If he wants "you time", he should want just that - time with YOU, regardless of what you're eating.


ooooor.....spend "you time" doing something new, like eating fresh fruit out of each others hands in the park, on a blanket....outside concerts this time of year are fabulous! :)

[rawstrawberry]

I agree with Dancer.

Make your time together revolve around activities instead of food.

Maybe in the future he can catch a bite to eat like pizza with some friends from work and than you can meet him and go for a walk, bike ride, movie, bowling, juice etc.

Going to the park and enjoying a fancy raw dessert.

That way you can eat your dinner raw without temptation and you both can have a romantic evening.

RS


Do any of you ever experience this? I have had a great day raw. :rolleyes: My first in months and months. My hubby gets home and wants to know if he can take me to dinner (alone...by ourselves...us time) at Pizza Hut. :eek: I can't tell you how much I hated saying the words...I've actually been raw all day. I've done really good. :( This made me sooooo sad. I wanted to go and have more than a toss salad. Enjoy a good meal...hot coffee...conversation. How do you guys deal with times and moments like these? (He won't go if I'm getting a salad. He feels like he's eating alone. I don't blame him. Have you ever eaten a pizza in front of a dieter...it's no picnic. I'm not at the stage of saying I'm completely enjoying what I'm eating...it's like torture for me right now.)

So...what would you do? Go to dinner...enjoy and go back to raw tomorrow? Or would you stick to your guns...go and have salad or not go at all?

[shashibala]

Perhaps he would compromise and go to a different restaurant where you could get more food? Like a yummy guacamole? He was so supportive of your raw lifestyle, I think he might consider it! :)

[Bananna]

I would go out with him and bring an avocado in my pocket to make the salad much better. And then the next night, surprise him with some raw pizza, eat it in some fitting location. And just love him for being so sweet and thinking of you and wanting to take you out in the first place!

[Nurse in the Raw]

I would ask him to take me some place where we could both enjoy our meal.

[Morn]

I agree with Nurse in the RAw. I would go where you both can have something that you like to eat. If pizza hut was the only option, I would go but only get a small side salad (maybe eat something else before you go so you are not tempted to eat more than a salad when you are there - plus you won't be hungry now).

It is really difficult to gain momentum when you have to keep starting over. The more you give in, the more difficult it becomes to get back on track again. The more I "cheat" the more I want to keep "cheating" and the easier it is to justify bad food choices cause I have already screwed up. If you can't be strong, (and you want to) sometimes it is just best to avoid the temptation altogether and not go. You can always do something else together like take a walk or a nice drive, etc. to have alone quality time.

But you know we have all been there. Hang in there it will get easier again.

[ShelShel]

You know, I think that is it Morn. It's hard to just keep starting over. And also, our Pizza Hut is brand new and is more like a bistro than the older styles. They serve and awesome garden salad and have orders of celery. :rolleyes: But that's just it...this is what I always get when we go out. That's the only food available in a restaurant...salad. There are no fruit desserts...(living in a town where they serve mostly pizza and wings)

Yes, there are sooooooo many times this sweet man of mine will surprise me with a fruit platter from the grocery store or say, "Order anything you want on line to help you stay raw." He's extremely supportive of me...in everything I undertake.

So, on those rare moments when he wants to just splurge with me (to him this being the first time in his week...for me...I've been struggling with bingeing all week) it becomes one of those agh moments.

My end result: Last night I said it to him. I've actually stayed raw all day. I've done good. :) I smiled. He smiled at me and asked what we have in the house and said he'd have whatever I was eating. It turned out good. I'm still raw, but if I could go back and relive that moment over...I would have gone and enjoyed the time together starting back to raw again later. Which is probably why I'm having such a hard time getting back to 100%.

I always eat raw throughout the day, but I seem to cave somewhere along my night. Opting for the enjoyment around the experience of a shared meal more than sticking it out 100%.

Can the results be as beneficial to our bodies if we eat mostly raw? 80% and above? Perhaps I've been pressing too hard, too quick. It's suppose to be a journey, not just a destination. Perhaps my problem isn't that I'm not staying raw...I'm not staying 100%...I'm always...always raw...at least 80% of my day...perhaps my expectations in this stage of life are just too much for my body.

I think I'm going to try to be easier on myself and really enjoy living...focusing on the journey more than the destination. If I maintain 100% and can fit into anything...but miss all the special moments in between...they can bury a good looking corpse. But if I smell the roses...sometimes sampling moments with those I love...in the end...I'll have lived a more full life...and the pretty corpse they bury may be holding a few extra pounds, but she'll be sporting a smile. :p

Raw (((HUGS)))

[Jenifae]

Whenever my husband wants to go eat he now says......"Well, where do you wanna go? What can you eat?"
It's hard I know. Eating out has been my main struggle. I just don't even wanna do it because, I'm too tempted still. It's easier eating at home.

That's so great that he was flexible and willing for you. How nice of him. What a good honey. ;)

[GlimR]

Shel~
You have inspired me so many times as you've walked this road...and you still do. Reading this thread has been really good for me this morning...wishing you all you need toward your happiness~ *hug*

[lodestar]

i suppose that if this was only about how i look...well who knows. but, this is much more than that for me. i am whole. my head is better, my heart is more intuitive, my nature is more positive, i am whole. and experience has shown me that a taste here and there makes a very slippery slope to misery. it's take me four years to finally figure out that i'm just not the kind of girl that can do 95%. i'm too vulnerable to making my way back to detesting my preoccupation with the next food fix. i won't live that way.

[Bananna]

I used to think I couldn't control myself either with the binging on cooked food. So with the added frustration of seeing two friends get thin on weight watchers, I joined and I knew I would follow it, because by golly if They can do it, well than so can I, cuz I try Way harder at losing weight than they do...lol, even though it seems like I am always losing the Same weight over and over.
I am going on my third week and I haven't messed up. I'm doing it online since I am on here a lot anyways.
Now don't all you mods get your backhairs up, because going raw is still my focus! I am just putting a fence up in the cooked food world so that when I fall, I don't necessarily feel like I am failing. I have been feeling stress about this for a full year now. I started the July challenge last year here.

Just an idea, if you can't go all raw yet, you might try it, it's working for me so far, and I find I am eating more and more raw food because I Love it, not because I Have to....if that makes sense.

That being said, you are such a beautiful and inspiring girl ShelShel, love reading your posts!

[NoGMO!]

yeah, I understand. I used to work at an office that would cater - usually pizza - every Friday. Even before I was eating raw, I never dreamed of wanting a bite... of bleached, genetically experimental white flour, white sugar, corn syrup and toxic chemical "enhancers". I just felt bad for those who insisted on ingesting such abominations passing for food.

make dinner together or go somewhere you'll both enjoy... or celebrate with something other than food.

[lytlsprout]

Most raw foodist believe that it's not what you eat but what you don't eat that makes the difference. So even if you're 80% raw if the other 20% is pizza and fast food that's not good for you body either. Your late night cravings are probably detox. And when you put it in your body again you'll just have to go through the detox again. And remember it's not about the food it's about the company. With my last boyfriend often instead of going out to eat (which we couldn't really afford anyways) I would make dinner and we would do romantic at home. I would also often make him a nice steak or something fancy and make me something fancy raw and we would leave the dishes till the next day.

[Morn]

Shel Shel - sounds like you have such an awesome and supporting husband. THat is so cool. I just loved your post and Realness! Ultimately this is your journey and YOU have to live with it so if it is 80% raw that you can live with longterm (and it helps you be raw the rest of the time) than so be it! Maintenance mode has not been easy for me either. We think a bite here and there won't hurt us and we wish we could just eat whatever and still be thin (but at least for me it doesn't work that way). Coming from a SAD upbringing lifestyle I never went into eating raw with the intention that I would never eat cooked food again. I did it to lose weight and get healthier. Now that I am Healthier I want to stay this way but I am still trying to figure it all out myself. We all have the figure out the right balance that we can live with and be successful with to maintain our health and overall well being.

You sound like you are on the right track and know what you ultimately desire and can live with. :)

[SuBu]

I agree with you all the way ShelShel. And that's what I've been doing. But that "living" and enjoying dates with my husband have put 20 lbs back on me! I just can't seem to handle moderation or splurging occassionally. I'm doing the MC right now to try to get some control back. I hope you have an easier time keeping it all in check than I did. You have to find what works for you. And if you find that your original plan isn't working, you can always start a new plan. Just keep that special relationship going strong.

[Anastazia]

Wow, just wanted to say I've really been blessed by all your responses to this...

...we gotta take it one day at a time, but also, have a plan, & stay flexible, right?

& day by day, we'll figure out what works for us!

If I gotta stay raw to keep the weight off & stay healthy & keep MS at bay, so be it. I've set my mind to do whatever I gotta do, but that doesn't mean it ain't hard sometimes!

Balance...

...& you sure have a sweetie of a hubby, Shel-Shel!
~Anastazia~