Looking...older?

[iamacranberry]

So I have an interesting "problem"...and please, no one slap me for saying this...but does anyone have advice for looking OLDER?

My reason is this: I'm going to be looking for jobs pretty soon teaching music to people ages approx. 14-18, and although I myself am in my twenties, I look like I'm about 17, and I'm afraid that as much as such a thing shouldn't happen, people will not take me seriously. I'd also want my students to be able to not end up subconsciously psychologically confused by the fact that I look very young. Apparently even wearing a business suit people mistake me for a school girl...

[mtraezme]

That's funny, I have the same problem. I'm a high school teacher and I'm 29 but look like my students. I've found it mostly about attitude. The kids always think I'm younger, but when they realize I'm not and that I am in control of the class, I don't have any problems. I wish I had some advice other than attitude and professional clothes, but I don't.

[Shuu]

Haircut is one of the simplest ways to look older, as well as makeup and clothing that fits well and is age appropriate. And, at least for interviews, wear heels.

[Theogirl]

Heavy rimmed glasses? You can get em with clear lenses! :p

[MrsJohnnyG]

Yep, I had this problem until I turned 35... the key is, like mtraezme said, attitude... and like Shuu said, a good makeover with a chic "older" hairstyle and clothes/shoes.

Usually what happened with me is that people thought I was younger, until they heard me speaking. Apparently, sounding mature and intelligent trumps looking like a kid! :D

[Aleesha Sattva]

well said julia!

[RawHeaven]

Iamcranberry, oh wow we're singing the same song. I'm 5'2 and am also blessed with the looking young genes. Runs in my family. All of my life I've been judged for being much younger than I am. When I graduated from college and was ready to enter the big corporate world, it was sometimes very challenging. I wore glasses, heavy suits with big shoulder pads, used my big vocabulary but people still talked to me like I was 15 years old by the time I was in my mid 20's! Especially when I was managing people who were much older than me...I had to do a lot of proving of my capabilities. LOL.

I will be 45 very soon and I still get hit on by men half my age which makes me laugh as I've always been kind of clueless when it comes to this. Oh! You're interested in me? I had a 19 year old asking me what school I went to the other day and I didn't have the heart to shock the heck out of him. Hey there, I could be your mama! hahaaa. Nobody believes how old I am unless they know me and I tend to keep it to myself. I get the standard reaction which I've learned to ignore..."you're too young to know what I'm talking about" or "it was before you were born". And on the flipside, I have friends of all ages and young women are usually surprised I got to bed before 9pm. You want to go clubbing? Are you nuts?! I'll be asleep before we pull out of the driveway.

I finally have given into it after all of these years of trying to look "older". You can't really do too much about it, you simply look young. And you're going to look EVEN younger the longer you're raw. Ironically, it's what many people want but there are times when it can be frustrating.

Use your blessed gifts to your advantage when you work with the young people. I would bet they will find you very refreshing. Children today are pretty bright and unlike the older crowd, myself included, they're not easily charmed with BS. They seem to see you right through to your spirit. You have a great big spirit, so I'm sure they will listen, learn from you, respect and love you.

Be yourself.

Lots of love,
Crystal

[Draginvry]

I get this a lot. If I'm just out normally, people think I'm about 20. If I shave, people think I'm still a teenager.

I've gone to several jobs where they've asked "you know you've got to be 18 to work here?" or "you have to be 21 to work here" or some such. I usually just smile and say, yes I know. Then they get around to asking me how old I am, and I tell them I am 26. They look really embarassed.

I usually just ignore it. If people still want to think I'm in high school, that's their business. I will just look for another job, for someone who wants me for my strength and intelligence, and not some moron who is concerned only with mere appearances. There are more important things in life than wearing owl-rimmed glasses just so you can fool some idiot who doesn't know how to judge age.

[Conscious Midwife]

Aigner Shoes
Hair Cut
Glasses

Does the trick everytime

[iamacranberry]

lifeagift, I'll have to see what I can do about the shoes and the haircut. I've tried experimenting with French twist hairstyles, but just yesterday I had one and one of my music therapy kids (16 years old) started hitting on me until I stopped him and let him know that I was one of the session leaders and have two university degrees...Maybe it's the shoes; I'll try that.

And Rawheaven, Draginvry, I am do glad to know we're in the same situation!

[RawHeaven]

Aigner Shoes
Hair Cut
Glasses

Does the trick everytime

Great advice...

but when i had to wear formal business attire, just made it worse for me & made me look like I was playing "dress up". lol. I'm no longer in the corp world and now just stick with wearing clothes that make me feel good and don't worry about what other people think of me anymore.

[RawHeaven]

I had one and one of my music therapy kids (16 years old) started hitting on me until I stopped him and let him know that I was one of the session leaders and have two university degrees...

And Rawheaven, Draginvry, I am do glad to know we're in the same situation!

Yes, it's nice to know we're not alone! I thought I was the only one with the teenagers trying to hook up! LOL. What's worse is men my own age think I'm too young which blows that whole misconception out of the water that they're after younger women. Most men I know like women their own age. Anyway, I have a boyfriend (10 years younger) so I'd better lock it up...don't want the Universe to think I'm ungrateful. hehe.

Seriously, good luck with it and hope the shoes work. It's a drag having to tell someone your age all of the time I know, but sometimes you've gotta do it.

[RawHeaven]

I've gone to several jobs where they've asked "you know you've got to be 18 to work here?" or "you have to be 21 to work here" or some such. I usually just smile and say, yes I know. Then they get around to asking me how old I am, and I tell them I am 26. They look really embarassed.

I usually just ignore it. If people still want to think I'm in high school, that's their business.

Getting carded is something that will also probably never go away. Until maybe we reach 100? I don't even say anything anymore and just hand them the ID and wait for the perplexed expression. In my truly younger days when I was your age, it used to annoy me to no end. Now I just find it amusing.

Isn't that the truth?! "It's their business" indeed.

[spicyfull]

Enjoy it...........And KEEP ON LIVING. As long as you are Comfortable in your own skin, so will everyone else be around you. Have a RAW Day....

[RawHeaven]

Enjoy it...........And KEEP ON LIVING. As long as you are Comfortable in your own skin, so will everyone else be around you. Have a RAW Day....

Sage and sound advice, but it also helps to express your experiences and release them. For me personally, it's nice to know I'm not alone and to be validated & self-validated. You don't come by this wisdom when you're 18 and being teased for looking like you're 12...takes a lifetime sometimes to "be comfortable in your own skin".

[iamacranberry]

Indeed it does...even when I was a kid in school I looked younger than everyone else...I was a skinny little stick kid, really short, and developed reeeaaalllly late!

[rawstrength]

I am often told that I look younger than I am, too. I am 18 but people think I'm around 14. My sister is 14, but looks 17! It can be frusterating, sometimes.

Mostly, though, I think it's a positive thing. I hope to live to at least 100, so I'm going to enjoy looking young while I can!

[iamacranberry]

When I'm 100, I plan to look like I'm 50. Then I will surely appreciate looking younger than I am...lol

[Conscious Midwife]

Aigner Shoes
Hair Cut
Glasses

Does the trick everytime


Doesn't have to be biz attire but defiantely consider layering with a crotchety (is this a word?) old granny sweater or wear a brotch (sp?)

[jacsam]

My daughter taught piano when she was 17 and maybe even at 16. Don't worry about it, the students LOVED her and the parents were very happy with what she did with their children. They will ask you to teach them if they feel like you have what they are looking for.....be confident. I have learned ALOT from people who are younger than me and LOVE them for it. Your students will love you....your going to do great and time will give you experience and make you an even better teacher. I also teach music lessons and love it.