hi from california: a confession

[rawchica]

Hello people!

I'm new to the forum, and new to raw. So far i really like my new raw-food lifestyle. It has been 3 months, and i don't have any desire to eat cooked food.

things are great so far. my skin is brighter, my allergies seem less severe, and i don't have to wear deodorant.

besides all that, i need to confess something. I have never told anyone about this, and it's been bugging me again. here it goes:

I suffer from binge eating.

whew!:eek:

It's not severe. i'm not overweight or depressed. i don't purge afterwards. rather, i count calories to make sure that over a few days afterwards, i balance out the calories overall. I won't go into details, but I have been dealing with this since 2002. Sometimes it goes away for some reason, and then suddenly I want to eat everything in sight again. Lately, it happens about 1-2 times per week. I might eat around 4,000-5,000 calories per day during a binge. right now, i like my body and my weight, but I do weigh myself every day and get frustrated when the scale goes up by 1 or 2 lbs., even though i know that no one else would notice such a change.

I don't feel desperate about this, but I don't understand why this happens. I believe in raw food for lots of reasons, and i was hoping that freedom from bingeing would be a nice side-effect. No luck so far, though.

my strategies for dealing include not judging myself about it, not letting the guilt set in, etc. Sometimes I have food plans for the day, but usually the more I count calories, the more likely I am to gain weight. i know that eating when i'm hungry and stopping when i'm satisfied makes me feel wonderful, physically and emotionally.

I'm not sure i'm looking for advice, but i guess it seemed like a safe place to admit my little secret. thanks for listening! i look forward to communicating with you all throughout the forums!

[StarFire]

Aloha and welcome to RFT RawChica! well.. actually you're right at home here... many of us are closet binge eaters.... and it is something we are working hard to change and heal.

Finding out what triggers those feelings is very important -- and while yu are on this journey... it more than likely will make it'self known to you. I love your attitude of not feeling guilty about it... not being hard on yourself about it... all of these steps are so important....

healing takes time RawChica... and emotional healing even longer... binge eating happens as a result of some kind of emotional need... You are either stuffing your feelings down, hiding from something, or hurting.... either way -- it's all a journey... and that's part of what this LIFEstyle is about.... healing Spirit, Soul and body....

in time you will find your path and your balance... so be patient with yourself cuz really -- you are doing pretty darn fantastic!!!

and don't stress over the scale!!! The scale is not your friend!! ;) Oh - btw... I'll bet you've been using the scale wrong too... here let me show you how you're supposed to use it!!! Works every time!

http://i149.photobucket.com/albums/s43/FireStar_830/scale.jpg

http://i149.photobucket.com/albums/s43/FireStar_830/welcome.gif

[spicyfull]

I wish you everything you need to Stay RAW..........Welcome to MY World.

[rawchica]

hi guys, thanks for your hello's and support!

I know i'm on the right path. I have come a long ways on my journal to health and happiness over the years already! I have just observed these strange habits of mine not wanting to disappear entirely.

I never used to own a scale. it's just that my friend, whose apartment I "took over" left some of her stuff, and a scale is one of those things! So i started weighing myself.

Anyway, i must say that in general, i feel great. I am in a healthy relationship, i run marathons, i'm finally finishing my master's degree, i'm a musician. I am not afraid of food (anymore) and don't go around fretting about possible binges. it's like just the last little dot on my life. I mean, really, everything is great. One mentor used to tell me, if i got upset about something or especially if i felt let down by myself, "It's ok, you are still young. you don't have to be a buddha yet!"

happy raw food days! i'm going to go make myself a green smoothie. my favorite is what i call green applesauce: 2 or 3 apples, 1 banana, some carrot greens or other mild greens, and dash of cinnamon. eat it with a spoon. yum!

[jacsam]

I had a friend confide in me about having the same problem and I have no idea what to do or not to do to help. I would love to know about anything you learn along the way in hopes to be supportive and helpful to my friend. Welcome and congrats on your success so far.

[rawchica]

jacsam,

first, i would tell your friend that she should definitely release any guilt or shame she has. I don't know how deeply entrenched your friend is in compulsive eating. Is she purging as well? Is she obese? As with any problem, there are many different levels to the suffering.

The fact that she confided in you shows she trusts you and regards you as a real friend. Let her talk to you about her problems whenever she needs to. Remind her that guilt and shame are useless emotions. When she finds herself over-eating, she can calm her mind down and observe what she is doing, and analyze it rather than get into the self-hate cycle. She can also try to track what sorts of emotions and events happen in her life which take place at the same time she wants to over-eat. Maybe she will see a connection between stress or anxiety and eating. For me, it's when I have many important things to get done, but feel overwhelmed as if I can't complete them all. Instead of starting in on the mound of things to do, i tend to want to eat.

If she is feeling very guilty and sad about overeating, or about mistakes in general, remind her that she is young (is she young?) and that no one expects her to be a buddha yet. We are all on our own path!

Finally, for you, don't YOU start feeling guilty if she doesn't succeed right away! We are all our own keepers, are while it's awesome that you want to help your friend, she is the only one that can do so. No one can fix her problems for her. Be there as a friend, and when she's ready to take steps to help herself, you can hold her hand, but you can't take the steps for her.

good luck!!!