lambe
03-01-2008, 10:36 AM
while i was kicking myself at first, i am now kind of kissing myself for my slip-up last night:
after being 97% raw (occasional dark chocolate, hot tea, alcohol) for going on a month, i COMPLETELY broke it in a matter on minutes last night. i had gone to a party where i felt socially anxious beyond reckoning, i wanted to huddle up in a fur corner & fall asleep. i almost cried i was so confused there. i went home, turned on twin peaks with my roommate, drank some wine & got comfortable. she was comfortable with homemade macaroni & cheese, & i wanted the state she was in. so i helped myself to a small portion without a second thought. CHEESE, PASTA, MILK. they hadnt been in my diet for weeks. i didnt even finish my helping as it tasted like nothing. it really did not taste good to me, or like anything to me, & my roommate is an excellent cook.
after unsuccessfully trying to comfort myself with macaroni & cheese, i looked towards the other cookies & cakes we have around, & though luring, i actually thought about it before i made my move. i thought about how bland the mac & cheese tasted to me, how bland most anything else cooked is going to taste to me, & ate 2 immaculate oranges instead.
they exploded with good juice & i was sufficiently comforted. little jewels.
after being 97% raw (occasional dark chocolate, hot tea, alcohol) for going on a month, i COMPLETELY broke it in a matter on minutes last night. i had gone to a party where i felt socially anxious beyond reckoning, i wanted to huddle up in a fur corner & fall asleep. i almost cried i was so confused there. i went home, turned on twin peaks with my roommate, drank some wine & got comfortable. she was comfortable with homemade macaroni & cheese, & i wanted the state she was in. so i helped myself to a small portion without a second thought. CHEESE, PASTA, MILK. they hadnt been in my diet for weeks. i didnt even finish my helping as it tasted like nothing. it really did not taste good to me, or like anything to me, & my roommate is an excellent cook.
after unsuccessfully trying to comfort myself with macaroni & cheese, i looked towards the other cookies & cakes we have around, & though luring, i actually thought about it before i made my move. i thought about how bland the mac & cheese tasted to me, how bland most anything else cooked is going to taste to me, & ate 2 immaculate oranges instead.
they exploded with good juice & i was sufficiently comforted. little jewels.