Hi! Advice needed...

[mel_s12]

Hi everyone!
My name is Mel. I'm from Vancouver, Canada currently living in Toronto but moving back west next month.
Here is my story:
I am studying nutrition and from there found my way into raw foods. I took the 5 day accelerated course with Alissa in Maine and was so inspired. I absolutely love raw food, I love preparing it, I love eating it, I love the ideas behind it, I love the colors, I love everything to do with natural, whole foods.
Now for my obstacles:
#1 - I am an on-call flight attendant. Not only am I a flight attendant, but I dont know where I will be going until literally the last minute. I can be sent anywhere in the world. I know that I should have lots of dehydrated foods on hand, and fruits and veggies to take with me, but sometimes I am gone for days and days at a time and I run out of food within the first day or two. Also, going across the border is a little tricky as there are so few fruits and veggies that you can actually take with you. I try my best to eat as healthy as possible when I run out of raw food but I am an all or nothing kind of girl. And most of our hotels are in the middle of nowhere and don't have markets or anything. Just expensive room service and fast food restaurants nearby.
#2 - My other obstacle is my boyfriend. When I am not flying, I am with my boyfriend. I love him so much but we have such different views when it comes to food. He definitely was not happy when I found raw. I stopped cooking for him and tried to get him to eat raw. It did not last very long. He started eating horrible food like pizzas and scones for a meal. So I started cooking for him again. Sometimes I will eat the food I cook. It is still fairly healthy but it always makes me feel gross no matter what it is. Is there anyone that still cooks SAD for their significant others?
#3 - I just like food. Sometimes I have this little devil inside of me that tells me I can eat anything and I'll be fine. Like right now I'm craving an Oreo sandwich. Blah.

Can anyone relate with me? Or have any advice?
I would really appreciate it!
Love Mel

[StarFire]

Aloha and good to see you posting again mel! Wow! enjoyed reading your post. That is so cool that you got to got to go to Alissas work shop! that is my dream! How awesome for you!

as far as your obstacles.... maybe give a shout out to reneeH
here's the link to her blog: http://www.rawfoodtalk.com/blogs/blog-11363/

she is a flight attendant too! I'm not sure if she has the same schedule issues going on as you - but she might have some ideas b/c she of course will know what you can take and what you're dealing with. Plus she's an amazing and wonderful rawbie!

now your bf... there are many rawbies who do cook for their bf, dh, so.... all that. Sometimes when your partner isn't interested in eating like you do... the best thing is to just 'be the example'. You don't have to be a 'raw pusher!'... they will see the changes in you - the beautiful vibrant radiant glow - the change in your mooods, etc... then they will begin asking questions and trying the foods and little by little - they will shift and change... They are on their own journey - and no matter how much we love them, they must find their own path.

Oreo sandwich... aaack... :eek: quick - go drink a green smoothie!!! ;)

it will take time to find your balance mel... just take it one day at a time! (personally I loved jumping in 100% and simply followed the 30 day plan in Alissa's book)... but even with that - it still was a process and finding my balance, being grounded and learning as I went...

shoots girl -- yu've been to one of Alissas workshops --- you're waaay ahead of the game - you just have to decide how badly yu want vibrant health and beauty!!

RAWK ON! ;)

[solarliving]

I agree with Starfire. Leading by example is the best way to influence someone. I feel that when it comes to love, your SO will support your choices. It's challengin when the partner doesn't have good eating habits and only eats well when you cook for them. In the end, I hate to say this, but you're not responsible for his well being. Perhaps if you give it time, and he has eaten enough crap he will come to desire what you're uncooking. I found this a while ago and thought I would share because sometimes we forget that we are all 100% responsible for our own life and happiness.

Here is a short list of the characteristics of Love vs. toxic love (compiled with the help of the work of Melody Beattie & Terence Gorski.)

1. Love - Development of self first priority.
Toxic love - Obsession with relationship.
2. Love - Room to grow, expand; desire for other to grow.
Toxic love - Security, comfort in sameness; intensity of need seen as proof of love (may really be fear, insecurity, loneliness)

3. Love - Separate interests; other friends; maintain other meaningful relationships.
Toxic love - Total involvement; limited social life; neglect old friends, interests.

4. Love - Encouragement of each other's expanding; secure in own worth.
Toxic love - Preoccupation with other's behavior; fear of other changing.

5. Love - Appropriate Trust (i.e. trusting partner to behave according to fundamental nature.)
Toxic love - Jealousy; possessiveness; fear of competition; protects "supply."

6. Love - Compromise, negotiation or taking turns at leading. Problem solving together.
Toxic love - Power plays for control; blaming; passive or aggressive manipulation.

7. Love - Embracing of each other's individuality.
Toxic love - Trying to change other to own image.

8. Love - Relationship deals with all aspects of reality.
Toxic love - Relationship is based on delusion and avoidance of the unpleasant.

9. Love - Self-care by both partners; emotional state not dependent on other's mood.
Toxic love - Expectation that one partner will fix and rescue the other.

10. Love - Loving detachment (healthy concern about partner, while letting go.)
Toxic love - Fusion (being obsessed with each other's problems and feelings.)

11. Love - Sex is free choice growing out of caring & friendship.
Toxic love - Pressure around sex due to insecurity, fear & need for immediate gratification.

12. Love - Ability to enjoy being alone.
Toxic love - Unable to endure separation; clinging.

13. Love - Cycle of comfort and contentment.
Toxic love - Cycle of pain and despair.

As for traveling, there are many things you can make to bring along. There are some good bagel recipes, nut bars, fudge balls, etcc. that are easy to tote around.

Best wishes,

Solar

[spicyfull]

I wish you everything you need to Stay RAW..............

[mel_s12]

You are all so amazing. Thanks so much for your words of encouragement :D