help- need support on staying RAW

[lukster9]

hi everyone! I was RAW for 2 weeks and felt great, totally wan't ready for that so i went crazy for 3 weeks and now i've been RAW 3 weeks again. I know i've lost some weight, but of coures because I haven't dropped the extra 30lbs i have on my body i'm getting discouraged. I lost my job last week and i am stresssed and depressed and want to eat to just make all the feelings go away. I know that isnt the answer, but i'm feel so alone and desperate, not knowing how i'm going to pay my bills. I realize that i feel so much better RAW UGH! help, anyone, everyone! sometimes life is so hard.

[Fairygirl33]

I hear you...ive felt that way before. one thought that helps me in those moments, is knowing that feeling crappy never lasts forever (even thought it might feel that way at the time).
Its wonderful thatyou went raw for 2 weeks and felt good! If you did it once, you can do it again!

i know its not great that you lost your job, but it gives some time to create amazing raw recipes to get your started. do you have alissa's book?

there is a lot of support on the forum here, i wish you the best of luck!
:)

[kyrie]

This isn't about raw eating but this may cheer you up.

I'm a refugee. I had an abusive childhood (money wise I lived a very comfortable existence, but I had no freedom, no voice, I was at the mercy of my family), and then when I thought I'd gotten away from that, found myself in a foreign country without a work visa, in the middle of winter, no family etc, and I was going to be homeless within weeks. I couldn't go back to the abuse, so I decided to stick it out.

Well worse was to come, because I couldn't find legitimate work, I started to work in a brothel. Yes, I was a prostitute, and for 5 years.

It was living hell. I saw things, and heard of things and experienced things I will never forget. It got to the point where I thought, I'm going to get contaminated cocaine or heroine and kill myself. That was only 3 years ago. I saw no way out, whatsoever.

Then I got locked up by the immigration authorities for 7.5 months. I've never been so scared, not because I was locked up, but I was afraid of the future, of what could happen if I was deported to my home country. I faced losing what little freedom and autonomy I'd enjoyed for 5 years.

The first night I was locked up, I was distraught, I was seriously suicidal. A guard came and talked to me, and I explained my situation, and she told me not to give up. The next morning the Immigration official interviewing me was not helpful.

However, I got a phone card from one of the guards, and I called Legal Aid. They were the only ones who said I had a case for protection. Everyone else, you name it, charity workers etc, said I was a goner.

Now inside there I had no money, and no way of making any. My movements were fairly strictly monitored,and everything I did, went into a file. If you were uncooperative, you got locked up in solitary indefinitely.

There were moments where I thought I'd lose it. There were nights all I did was cry and pray. I had no idea where I was going to get the documents to prove my case. I didn't want to shower, most times all I wanted was to sleep. However I had hope, because of what Legal Aid told me. So I stopped requesting Valium. I talked to others in my predicament, and one day while I was out in the yard where visitors came, I saw a woman.

I didn't know her, but I went over and said hi!!!! She saved my life!!! Literally!
She did all my research for me, thousands of pages of printouts, delivered by express mail. I only had to tell her what I wanted, and I would get it.

Basically I had nothing to start with, but I was determined I was going to win my case. I had no other choice. So if friends came I got phone cards, I made calls to my home country and got the govt there to fax me info, without them knowing where I was exactly. And they faxed into the prison I was in.

I had a govt appointed advocate, who is now one of my best friends. I worked on my case night and day. I had no money but I managed to always get phone cards, and everything I needed to win. I think God helped yes. But I started without a thing, and everyone telling me I cannot win.

I even got Amnesty International to write a report for me.And I arranged all this over the phone. I got my country ambassador to write a supporting letter. And I wrote an additonal submission to go with my advocate's submission. Not only that I wrote letters for others as I could.

I had no internet access, just access to basic wordprocessing equipment. I got help from the Catholic church with research, and other refugee services.

I did the impossible!!! I won, and I got my residency, and I am waiting now for my citizenship. And the government changed the law through the High Court after I won.

I am no longer a prosititute, instead I've been back to school, I have a normal job, though I'm having a lot of dramas with that, I've overcome illness, rapes, hunger, degradation, you name it. I've lived in luxury, and I've lived in filth.I've had servants, and I've had no food for days. I've lost my dignity, only to regain it.

I will never be the girl again forced to sleep with a pedophile so she can put food in her stomach. And saying no to procuring young girls for predators, despite not eating for days and days. I will never listen to someone's sick fantasy of bestiality and having to endure it with a smile. Never again!!!

I won, and I had nothing to start with.

So if I can win in an unwinnable situation, and get my life back, you can do raw I believe fully, and not only that you can control your life. Oh and I will never be bashed by anyone again, not parent, nor punter, nor anyone else

Good luck and happy trails.

Carla.

[justinesmith]

You are amazing. Your story is incredible. My heart is crying and cheering for you at the same time. Thank you for putting things in perspective.... thank you for sharing.

[Morn]

All I can say is don't give up! I know when life gets difficult it is easy to throw in the towel. But remember that you are worth more than that! Our temporary trials are just that temporary! Remember this too shall pass. Jobs come and go and situations change over time. Do the best you can when finances are tight. My prayers and hugs go out to you. Hang in there my friend. It will get better!

[lukster9]

Morn, Justine, Carla,
thank you all so much. Carla your story is so great. I am thrilled for you.
thanks for all the support.
Missy

[bellabella]

Wow. I've got the chills....really, that story just made me feel like a big WHINER. TOO funny (but totally in line with my life lately) is that I saw that post. Just this second, I found out the predicament with a leased car that the towing company took back because we couldn't make the bills. It's worse than i thought...... and I've quit my job to follow my dreams, and that is financially stressful.

But you are right. You can DO anything you put your mind to. That story is living proof. Raw should be an absolute breeze. We're just spoiled.

[barose]

Wow. I've got the chills....really, that story just made me feel like a big WHINER. TOO funny (but totally in line with my life lately) is that I saw that post. Just this second, I found out the predicament with a leased car that the towing company took back because we couldn't make the bills. It's worse than i thought...... and I've quit my job to follow my dreams, and that is financially stressful.

But you are right. You can DO anything you put your mind to. That story is living proof. Raw should be an absolute breeze. We're just spoiled.

Dont make the mistake of underestimating what you're going through either. Whats difficult for YOU is difficult for YOU. In the past, when I was going through a particularly difficult time, I would say "well, at least I'm not going through X". Its actually not very helpful in certain ways. It lead to more self-hatred because I had harsh judgments of my own feelings and struggles and that lead to some pretty destructive behavior.

Though Its good to get perspective and know there is light at the end of the tunnel, dont judge yourself too harshly either - especially at a time like this.

[barose]

Oops Bellabella! I thought you were the OP for a second. I didn't mean to direct my post specifically at you, but I did want to respond to what you said.

[bellabella]

listen, you need a clear head and a high spirit, some self-confidence in times like this. SAD food will diminish all of that, right from the energy to look for a new job to the self-confidence you need to succeed. let Raw eating be your first of several successes to the day.

[kyrie]

I would say to anyone reading my post, the only reason I've shared is to say that even when all looks lost, and no matter how difficult or seemingly impossible the situation is, if you keep plugging away, and don't give up you'll get there.

My life now is far from perfect.I have days when I whinge, but because I've been through this, and I've seen others go through worse or less, but come out standing at the end makes me believe that I can make it, that we all as human beings have that capacity.

All I'm saying is with raw or jobs or otherwise, never give up. I applied for over 100 jobs, before I got the one I have now.

NO car sucks, yeah it does. But if you can look at a sunset, watch a puppy playing, laugh with your partner, you can give yourself hope. And without hope, you're dead in the water in my experience.

The Secret is right in this case. Find things that you love, that don't cost anything, that make you happy. Make a list of them, and give thanks for them all. Try hanging out in the Daily Appreciations thread. Every little bit helps.

Have a great day.

Carla.

[lukster9]

You are all right with what you are saying. I guess what i really need is to feel like someone cares ya know. I'm single and without working i'm very isolated. It's much easier to pour your deepest secret out on a board like this than call a friend and say, 'ya know i'm really on the roof today'.
everyones support and comments are extremely appreciated.

[StarFire]

Aloha lukster... you know we are all here right? http://i149.photobucket.com/albums/s43/FireStar_830/hug-1.gif...

going thru those times when things seem their darkest can be really tough... but know that they won't last forever.

each day - do something positive... (yes start with your affirmations - that's always a great way to start the day...) but other than that - I mean- do something that is pointing you to the direction that you want to be headed...

eat something raw -- anything - even one piece of fruit... when you have a choice at meal time and if that choice is something cooked verses something RAW.... choose the raw...

put it out to the universe that you need a new job and that what you'd like to see in that new job... the universe is an amazing thing .... and wants to give you everything you want and need....

take it one day at a time - even if you have to pick your leg up and move it forward -- that's okay- it's still forward movement! Allow yourself to feel the emotions you're feeling - don't discount them - cuz they ARE REAL.... but don't wallow in them either... acknowledge them - and then shift gears... refocus your mind and spirit to something positive and in manifesting wht you are hoping to recieve and achieve...

plus... never forget that we are here too!!....

you'll do fine.... trust in yourself... you are much stronger than you give yourself credit for!!

blessings.... ;)

[lukster9]

thanks kika!
I've started the coconut oil 1T a day so far.
thanks for the positive directions.

[Queen Bean]

Your belief system is very powerful... have you ever read 'The Nature of Personality' or 'Seth Speaks - The Eternal Validity of the Soul' by Jane Roberts? They are amazing books.

I have a friend. A few years ago she was in her early thirties. She was living with her parents. She didn't had a car. She would borrow her parents car, but she had a car accident in it. A friend went overseas and lent her a car. She had another car accident. (She wasn't hurt in either, but the cars were damaged.) She was single. She had quit her job in advertising, because she was burnt out. She was temping in offices, which wasn't very fulfilling. She didn't have much money.

I gave her some affirmations that focus on core beliefs. If these are in place, a lot of subsidiary beliefs follow on from that.

She wrote each belief 10 times a day. Or you could do them five times a day if that takes too long. It only takes around ten minutes.

They are:

Life is easy
The Universe is a friendly place
The Universe if for me
I can get what I need
People love me
I am perfect as I am
Life is fun
Love is safe
I am wanted
I can get enough love

A few years later she is happily married. Has a baby son. She is on maternity leave from a well-paid job in marketing. She and her husband have bought a house. She has a lovely new Peugot. She is focusing on her spirituality.

Obviously everyone's idea of success or happiness is different. But the thing is, her life is so much more in line with her ideals than what it was before.

These affirmations could help. You never know.

Oh, and another thing is...I said to try them for 3 weeks with no expectations...and to do them consistently... It's worth trying.

Oh, and if anyone else wants to try an experiment and you have acne, or even an occasional pimple, try flax seed oil on your skin at night. My skin is great, and I never break out at all.

Oh, and Kyrie, your story was unbelievably moving.