Something I posted in my blog

[bodaflower]

Nobody really comments on it (except starfire :D ) so I wanted to get it out here - this is what I wrote..




Last night, my friend and I got into a discussion about raw food. He said that he didn't like how raw foodists had dark circles under the eyes and looked weak (:confused:) and so I showed him pictures of raw people..including storm, angela stokes and a few other people..

He also said he didn't like how all the raw foodists he had talked to seemed like it was their way or no way..like if you were eating a cooked diet that you should be eating a raw diet and that's it (I had previously gone into a discussion about all the benefits of raw, he said he knew that I was genuinely trying to help him but other people might not think so)

He said that he felt perfectly healthy and that raw wasn't for everyone (I agree with this..) but that he was more lax with his diet than he has ever been and he feels good..I told him that being raw is something different than cooked, it brings about a whole different feeling and that I understood what he was talking about, because I've been on a cooked diet and felt healthy but that raw is such an amazing difference, again I told him about the energy I had and how great I felt but I wasn't pressuring him or anything..but I told him that until you've been raw you can't really understand what it's like.

He basically just kept saying that he wanted to be able to eat what he wanted wherever he wanted, that he felt healthy and good and was happy being so lax with his diet..

This was pretty much the end of us talking that night even though he slept over at my house, it got me really frustrated and I started crying when he left the room because to me, it's frustrating when I feel like I have the answer to so many problems, hunger, pollution, depression, obesity, and I just can't share it with people because they don't want to listen or don't want to change.

This got me thinking about whether I should still try and share my knowledge with people or just not tell them at all because they don't want to listen.

I was at my friend's house the other day and his dad (big guy..drank beer every night and ate meat) was in the room, my friend told him that I was trying to go raw (i wish he hadn't..it just causes controversy) and after I explained it to his father he laughed and said "uh huh, yeah you'll enjoy life a lot when you're older" and walked out of the room.

Well, considering that he is the one waking up in the middle of the night coughing and snoring and has a huge belly, yeah, thanks, I will enjoy life an incredible amount :rolleyes: He proceeded to offer me ribs a few times throughout the evening...

I just feel like if I can plant the seed in a persons mind..just let them know one little thing, no pressure, maybe they'll investigate it more and make a positive change for themselves and the world and I can have helped make their life better, directly or indirectly.

Most of my friends are open minded about it and interested when I talk to them about it, but some aren't...

I wanted to share my thoughts with this to everyone

[lavendarJ]

I know you didn't ask for advice just wanted to say I can totally absolutely relate to you. My best friend and I can't even discuss raw issues and it's kind of a downer because he is one of my closest friends. I 've known him forever and since I haven't dated in ages and ages he is the only male influence I have outside of family. But, he feels the same way...not for everyone, not necessarily healthy, etc. etc. We've had arguments and so now we don't even go there with the subject. He just flat out told me that he wasn't interested and really didn't need to hear about it. I guess I would be going on and on about a new recipe or something. So, everyone will not have your enthusiasm and just keep rawkin' along; trust me, they are watching you whether they let you know it or not..just keep loving you. Share your joy and passion with those who can appreciate it at this time.

[Ginger]

I totally understand where you are coming from and it is very frustrating. All you can really do is be the example and keep spreading the word in a friendly way and eventually others might come around. Even if they may not get it now or want to hear it, you planted a seed. Raw is becoming very popular nowadays so i'm sure these people you mentioned will hear more & more about raw as time goes on. But some people are not going to care & that's just all there is to it. Most people actually think they are healthy & feel good as they suffer from diabetes, IBS, cancer or whatever else and reach for beer and junk food..

[dreamrawalwz]

I can definitely relate to you. My dad mocks me all the time. He complains about this pain, being tired, high blood pressure, etc. and I tell him every time that there IS a way to change that if he changes his diet. He just rolls his eyes like "yea right" and kind of laughs to himself. He's not eating a SAD diet, but barely has any raw at all.

People think "healthy" means getting a cold, allergies, etc. and that's still "normal." They don't know what true health is until they've experienced it. Is he on any medication; prescription or OTC? As far as undereye circles and looking weak, how many raw foodists has he seen? Is he just generalizing? What was his response to Stoms' pictures and others? Sorry for so many questions!

I'm at the point where I dont want to share anymore either. Either I get lectured how it's unhealthy for me or others just don't care. I don't think people truely see a connection with their food and health (unless it's obesity and diabetes), but other than that I doubt it. I think if people see from your example and they come to YOU then that's when they're genuinely interested and you can take it from there.

[amyambro1]

Boda - I sympathize as well. Just last night I was at a family gathering and I had to hear individual opinions from each person. Usually after talking with someone about it/trying to defend myself against inaccurate assumptions, the person will say "Well if that's what you wanna do, then do it!" And I'm just kinda left hanging like "well, okay I will then! But you ask me all these questions and I had to answer them right?" It gets really frustrating and I think this is the ONLY truly difficult thing about being raw - you are going against the grain of the rest of society. It is truly important to keep trusting yourself. Also, one big mistake is do not try to get other people to become raw unless they seem truly interested. I've realized you can get really excited an start talking about it like crazy, but most people don't really want to be converted. I'd say just keep it to yourself and only talk about it if someone asks. Folks will be converted when they see the example you set. Hope this helps!

[Coriander74]

From personal experience, I know that a lot of people aren't receptive at all to the raw lifestyle, and think that you're either starving yourself or that you're going to lecture them on vegan principles.

Maintain your enthusiasm for it :) Be happy that YOU are healthy, and that you're making all these fantastic choices. Hopefully when people see what Raw is doing for you, they might think a little differently. I agree that Raw isn't for everyone, though, but I honestly think people should try and be a little nicer about things. I hear these things -

"You're anorexic or something right?" (I was anorexic actually, several years ago, and this makes me madder than anything.).

"You're not going to start in on me about eating meat, are you?"

"You're not going to lecture me about wearing this jacket are you?"

"Here, you want some of this?" (meaning something nasty on their plate)

Keep talking to people about it. Keep hoping that little grain will grow and sprout and maybe someone will try it for themself. Don't give up! :)

[rawOrchid]

When I ate cooked for little bouts through this raw journey.... I've....

*gotten hugs and kisses from my mum

*gotten silent little nods from my dad

*"finally's" from my friends...


Now, with more wisdom, and self-acceptance, and healing energy, and intuition, I listen to what my needs and wants are, and if its not in correlation or in accord with another, then so be it. I love sharing my love and knowlegde of this lifestyle to others who are receptive to it. It ends there.

One will decide on their own time when one wants to change. In the meantime, I indulge in this beautiful lifestyle with peace and serenity.

Thanks for sharing this bodaflower.

[dreamrawalwz]

At work I keep getting asked if I'm going to "come to the other side" and eat xxx cooked item. Sometimes it's "are you going to come to the dark side again?"

[Ginger]

Sometimes I think the easiest thing to say, instead of having to defend myself, is well the results speak for themselves. I am just doing what works for me and gives me the results I want like not getting sick for the past 5 years, no more abcessed teeth, I re-grew a tooth, my skin looks better, I have more energy, I have a child that has never been to a doctors office or been ill in her life, and the list just goes on! I just don't have to defend anything with results like these!

[LNdolls]

I understand the urge, the drive and passion that makes us want to share this amazing discovery with people. Especially people we love, or who are suffering in some way.
The most effective way I have ever seen people be changed is if they are lead by example. If you just live your raw life, eat your raw food, be your joyful raw self: they will see over time and make their own choice.
We really cannot know what is best for each soul on their journey. Even though we have raw and love it, it does not mean it is for everyone.
The connection between the human and food is such a personal, intimate and private relationship. Time and your glorious example may do more good than anything you could ever say.

[bodaflower]

I understand the urge, the drive and passion that makes us want to share this amazing discovery with people. Especially people we love, or who are suffering in some way.
The most effective way I have ever seen people be changed is if they are lead by example. If you just live your raw life, eat your raw food, be your joyful raw self: they will see over time and make their own choice.
We really cannot know what is best for each soul on their journey. Even though we have raw and love it, it does not mean it is for everyone.
The connection between the human and food is such a personal, intimate and private relationship. Time and your glorious example may do more good than anything you could ever say.

Very very true :) This really spoke to me



Thank you everyone for sharing your thoughts and experiences with me, it really made this a positive experience for me and I feel I've learned a lot from it:)

[rawOrchid]

I understand the urge, the drive and passion that makes us want to share this amazing discovery with people. Especially people we love, or who are suffering in some way.
The most effective way I have ever seen people be changed is if they are lead by example. If you just live your raw life, eat your raw food, be your joyful raw self: they will see over time and make their own choice.
We really cannot know what is best for each soul on their journey. Even though we have raw and love it, it does not mean it is for everyone.
The connection between the human and food is such a personal, intimate and private relationship. Time and your glorious example may do more good than anything you could ever say.

beatifully said..

[spiralgirl]

bodaflower,

Here is my thought and I've only been raw 6 weeks. I don't tell people I'm raw but if they were to ask about why I'm looking good I might say I'm eating healthier and if they really genuinely were interested I would tell them more about it.

My mom and sister who have been raw a few weeks longer than me feel the same way. It does stir up controversy and it's no one's business what you eat. Also if someone who was overweight looked at me and said I'm struggling and they wanted my help I would launch into raw and how it's changed me. At this point it's not my job to change people and yes I know many people who don't want to change their eating habits. I was one of them for years and I was miserable with ailments I just dealth with and thought oh well.

It's really up to you, if you want to share then do so but be prepared for people to argue with you on this. Before going raw I thought it was all just fruit and salads so that is a hard concept to change in people.

Not sure where I sit with raw isn't for everybody because wouldn't everyone benefit from it? I mean okay I was living a crippled lifestyle before with food but even a healthy SAD person would benefit with more alertness, better sleep, not getting sick? Like I said I'm fairly new so maybe I will feel differently later on.

[spiralgirl]

RawVeganMom,

Wow, your teeth got better? I have some bad numbers with my gums and I went to the dentist 4 weeks after being raw and my numbers had improved a bit. Now I can't wait to go back 4 months from now and see if there is an even bigger difference and if they wonder I just might tell them the reason.

[Alba]

Spiralgirl --> check out The Oil Pulling Challenge thread - 2 in health related. People have had a lot of succes regarding teeth problems!

Love alba

[spiralgirl]

Alba,

Thanks for the tip.

[Nurse in the Raw]

Gosh, discussing raw with SAD eaters is like discussing religion or politics.

[bodaflower]

Pretty much :p

[EZ rider]

don't want to change.
I think that says a lot. For people to change they have to get out of their comfort zone and they don't want to do that. If anyone asks me about the way I eat or the contents of my shopping basket I usually refer them to a good book or two on the subject by title and author or possibly a web site where they can ask questions and continue on with my business and let them continue on with theirs. If they are interested then I just pointed them in the right direction and if not thats their business. This approach may sound like I don't care but actually its just that I don't care to get in an argument.

[the_lab_rat]

Wow, experiences like that must get so frustrating! It's weird how many people don't "get it" and think raw food is so weird or extreme. Like, a few weeks ago I took my grandparents out to a raw food restaurant. My grandma loved it and understood all the health benefits, etc, but my grandpa...well, let's just say he's a devout carnivore :( He kept asking if the meat and dairy were raw in dishes like spaghetti and meatballs or a cheese sandwich, and I kept explaining "it's not real meat or real dairy!" So then he started calling everything "fake," like fake meat and fake dairy. That turned into a silly inside joke (we ended up talking about fake plates and fake water and fake air all made of nuts and vegetables)... LOL! But it was still a tad frustrating that he thought of raw foods as "fake" when raw food is the most simple and natural form of food there is! Ah well, I suppose all we can do is plant the idea in peoples' minds and hope it grows... :)

[tisha]

I've learned from experience not to talk a lot about what I am doing (or more accurately, who I can and can not talk to). When I first started making changes in my eating and doing cleanses, I was so on fire with the health benefits that I wanted everyone to know. I just knew that they would find the answers that they had been looking for, health-wise. Boy, was I wrong. Some people are so ingrained that doctors, surgery and medication is the way to go that it's impossible to break that barrier.

That's okay. I learned that I can only change myself. I can be an example to others. I can answer questions if they ask. I can not make the changes for them.

Here are a couple of my favorite quotes on this subject:

"The pain of a new idea is one of the greatest pains in human nature...your favorite notions may be wrong, your firmest beliefs ill-founded. And your favorite foods may be the root cause of your greatest pains! It is a fact of life that people find it much easier to believe a lie they have heard a thousand times than a fact they have never heard before." Daniel P. Reid-The Tao of Health, Sex and Longevity

"It would be wise for us to remember as we lead and guide the lives of our children, (or anyone for that matter) that we can't expect them to accept our knowledge and understanding. They simply don't have our points of reference. We can guide them to correct principles, but we need to allow them their own experiences and allow them to grow at their own speed.

A good rule to go by is: Don't want something for someone else, more than THEY want it for themselves. If we sincerely desire to assist in lifting and building others, the greatest example we can give anyone, is our life working for us." Feelings Buried Alive Never Die", by Karol Truman

[hungrygirl]

Most people discourage and frustrate me when I share this wonderful information with them. That's why I don't want to share my eating style with anyone. So far though, I have to add, the most important people in my life are supportive and respectful of my food choices--my sweetie, my brother and sister-in-law. I have to say I'm a lucky duck. :p

[domestic goddess]

People will comment on my wight loss and say something to the effect of 'Wow, what did you do?' and I say 'Exercise and a raw food diet'. So far no one has gone any further with it than that unless they were really interested. I have 'converted' 2, possibly 3 people to raw...not including my children and husband who have to eat what I uncoook, lol :D