Need some advice..... really bad!!

[shalom]

OKay. So....

I have made the transition to about 95-100% depending on what i have.
The kids are usually there with me unless dh offers them waffles....:rolleyes:

Dh and i talked and he wants to commit to about 80% for now.

Here's the thing. I can't figure out what to make him! I don't know if he is detoxing (sure seems like it)...it seems like it would be too early. He made the decision about 48 hrs. ago... really, i have made him all his meals so far - so he is almost up there with me. Last night, we had company over and he had a small bowl of brown rice pasta w/ marinara. Today, he is extremely grumpy/edgy and hungry.. He is frustrated because he just wants the fluffy texture. You know, like that of fresh baked bread? And.... i don't know what to make. We don't have a dehydrator yet. I made him cashew fudge (yummy btw!), and nori wraps w/ a pate..... porridge, etc... I feel like i am being pretty creative for my limited appliances.... but i can't please!

It is hard cause although detox is rough... i think it needs to be embraced. And, though we have been vegan for a couple of years and high raw off and on.... he still grew up eating tons of bacon!! tons of microwaved meals... and his mom asked his ped to give him every vaccine - even the ones that wern't advertised yet!:eek:
So, it would make sense that he has more to flush than I do.

Also, about 2 years ago (last pregnancy) I was about 90% raw (give or take), and little to no organic. (now we are 100% organic) He mostly did it with me (or, more - for me - for my support) But i was more devoted. Juicing all the time, enemas here and there.... i really wanted to flush all the crap.

So, right now he is frustrated because he is comparing today's moods and cravings to last time, and afraid it is just never going to end.

I can only say so much. I have stressed that this is his decision and i am not pressuring him... but in chooseing to do it - means i am making his meals.... he is still at the point where he just stares at the fridge and says.... uh..:confused:

the summer isn't so bad - he loves to just mono-eat fruit. but .... now what??

Does any of that make sense? I realise i kind of rambled... but hopfully i made my point! :)
~

~shalom~

[Veganforlife]

Hey there! Why not do a compromise and everyone do a 30-day 100% raw challenge? That way you won't be making his meals, you'll ALL be eating the same thing - way easier on you?
Do you have Alissa's book?
Just a suggestion.

[juliebove]

Boy do I hate making the decisions for someone else's meals. My daughter knows what she wants and I often will ask her and fix whatever that is. My husband never seems to know what he wants. And he can get quite nasty if I fix something he doesn't want. He's not raw and he's a big meat eater. Daughter is not. So I often wind up buying a lot of prepared food for him since his meals are different. And I often wind up throwing a lot of that food away because he just doesn't eat it.

That being said, there are a few raw things he will usually eat with no complaints. Sandwiches made with onion bread, lettuce, tomato and Swiss nut cheese. Nacho cheese dip with raw veggies. Vegetable salads and fruit salads. Smoothies are another thing he used to inhale. They weren't raw in those days. I used to make them for him and my daughter and then one day they both got burned out on them. I no longer make them because daughter developed a banana allergy. I have figured out a way to make them for her with no bananas, but they are not raw. He's never around when I've made them for her though so I don't know if he likes them or not.

[shalom]

i should clarify - he is not all mad cause he wants to eat cooked...

He just doesn't know how to deal with the detox and cravings aspect... and i don't know what to make him when he *is* having those cravings.

The biggest thing for him re: detox, is that his job is very physical and customer related - so he can't just be detoxing and excuse himself to throw up - you know? Anyway, we talked and thought maybe while he is at work he should just have some bread (sprouted) w/ hummos or coconut oil spread on it. Then, whenever he is home, continue raw.


Does that sound helpful?

Which brings up the question, How do people handle detox at work???

[Veganforlife]

Hmmmm. Well...have you thought he may not have too bad of a detox? Some folks don't. I mean if you condition yourselves to think you will then surely you'll talk yourself into it. The more you/he continue to eat cooked AND raw, the more your body is struggling. If you dive in 100% your body will do what it is supposed to really be doing and you will heal quicker. This is something you all are going to have to decide. I agree with Alissa to go 100%. But that is just me and how I feel...

[shalom]

the thing is, he is complainging of too intense of a detox - and it has only been a couple days! So - that baffles me, and i wanted tips on how he should deal with it - since he still has to go to work and be social.... how do people detox at work?

[Lay-Lay]

I work with the public and I am not having issues. I am detoxing, but for the better. Raw puts me in a better mood for all!

[shalom]

I work with the public and I am not having issues. I am detoxing, but for the better. Raw puts me in a better mood for all!

... thats how *I* feel... i guess thats why dh's thing confuses me so much!


I also heard victoria butenko say that if you are experiencing detox symptoms (bad ones) that you are not getting enough fiber. It is when we are not getting enough fiber that our bodies choose to detox in ways other that the toilet!:D

[shooting star]

At the end of the day he is an adult and perfectly capable of making his own food! You don't have to take all the responsibility of preparing all the foodjust because you want to go raw.

Make what you want to make for both of you. If he eats if, fine. If he doesn't, save it for your meal tomorrow - he knows where the fridge and recipe books are if he wants something different.

OK so at the moment he stares at the fridge and waits for food to fall into his outstretched hands. Let him, he'll eat eventually!

[blacktulip]

i agree with shooting star. . . no matter how much you want those you love to be healthy and feel the way you feel from eating raw, in the end it has to be their own decision and they have to also take the initiative themselves.

i've noticed from over a year of completely raw, that just by eating the way i do (and glowing happily from it) and sharing the things i make with others, they want to eat that way more than if i tried to push it too much or too fast on them. conversations over a specially prepared raw meal or dessert (those hook everyone in!!!) work really well.

it's hard, cause food is so social, and you usually bond with your partner over food in every culture. but sharing the wonderful stuff you love, making big batches and keeping it in the fridge, making yummy dessert like snacks to have on hand, and making meals together helps a lot.
i feel like i'm not being very specific, but maybe this will lead to more questions or i'll think of more specific ideas!
continued good luck!

[Lay-Lay]

maybe some green smoothies would help?

[shalom]

These are all such great ideas....

I am not puhing him into anything - it is just hard because we are practically at the point where there is only produce and bulk (or prepared stuff) around. So, if he has to go to work in a 1/2 hour, and needs lunch - he can get kinda cranky. Not mean or anything just... you know - hungry! ;)

So - i just wish i could help him. But, if I am the one preparing the food, and i have certain needs/ cravings - i need to go with it! i mean, w/ two little boys and being pregnant, i only have so much time to get the food made and eaten. :)

He *does* work a a natural food store - so he knows that he has the option to grab something when he gets there, but usually he runs out of time or doesn't want to spend the extra money.

*** on a side note - i noticed that he does still eat more cooked food.... he kinda has perpetually bad breath.... i don't know what to say or do.

Is it ever a turnoff to anyone else to have a spouse that has cooked breath?:p

[blacktulip]

What about making containers of raw sushi and keeping it in the fridge. . . i buy one or two of the following:

jicama
sweet potato
cucumber
package of sprouts (or grow my own)
avocado
carrots
red peppers

(i don't always use all these veggies, sometimes it's just cucumbers and sprouts, or carrots and kelp powder, etc.)

then i make jicama rice with some miso, or nutritional yeast, or apple cider vinegar, or sometimes just plain (all depending on time and ingredients) in the food processor. My favorite lately is jicama, sweet potato, dulse and miso. Very simple. Strain the excess liquid from the "rice" and slice the veggies. Then with untoasted nori sheets, take 15-20 minutes and roll up some different combinations, adding sesame seeds, or wasabi, kelp powder, etc. and set aside so the nori sticks. By the time you're done making the last one, they're ready to start slicing. I fill containers with them and keep them in the fridge for lunches, dinners, and snacks. They keep really well, are super healthy and energizing and can be eaten quickly with fingers, taken on the go, or laid out with bragg's for dipping, and eaten slowly with chopsticks to savor as a special meal.

very filling and nutritious, inexpensive and lots of food for not a lot of ingredients really!

out of curiousity, shalom, are your children raw? and if so, what do they like? also what are you noticing with your pregnancy cravings while eating raw?