livenraw
12-27-2006, 11:24 AM
For the past 14 months, I have struggled on and off with raw. I was doing so good, reached my optimum health and along the way, something happened. I cannot even tell you what happened. But I didn't just slip. I fell. I fell far. And I fell on a ton of bricks and stone. At the beginning of this past year, I was so committed to being raw with my food. But life happened and got the best of me and I left my committment somewhere in the shadows of the forest. But I keep on going back and forth - at one time, I was 85% raw. The next time, I was 50%. The next time, I was 90%. Then I was 25%. But something happened to convince me to push my level and renew my committment to raw.
About a month ago, while having my ds and his girlfriend over for dinner, he happened to take a picture of the dh and me. When I saw that picture, I gawked at what I saw! A chubby face, swollen eys, older looking skin, a blotchy face (I blame my makeup for this but still....) And then I compared that picture to the picture that was taken of my dh and I sixteen months prior when he officiated a wedding and I had been 100% raw with my food and had been drinking herbal teas for 28 days so that probably made me 90% raw. I looked healthy, happy, young, vibrant, had a good stature and had the body I had never dreamed of having! In all my years on this earth, I had NEVER had that body! And I had so much confidence, too! My family couldn't believe the difference in me. My mom didn't know what to say when she saw that picture. All she could say was 'wow' at my transformation.
I've struggled over 14 months now because I want to get back to that point and then I get depressed about it. So it seems like I say 'okay. I'll start tomorrow.' But tomorrow never comes. Coffee has come and gone in my life during that time, too. I love the smell of coffee but realize now that I don't have to drink it just because I love the smell of it. I enjoy the smell of grlled onions but that doesn't mean I have to eat them. I enjoy going out to breakfast on the weekends but I can enjoy a fruit salad there. It's not about the food anyway but about the interaction with the family. That's more important than what they put on the table.
And after that long of struggling, my dh and I were discussing this the other night, and I told him that I wanted to go back to being the vibrant, young person I was in that photo sixteen months ago. That's my goal picture now. That's how I want to go back to looking. And I told him that I had planned to start at the beginning of the year. He told me not to wait but to start now. That way, I'll be 3 weeks ahead of schedule. And I am already ahead of schedule with him buying me the necessary foods and being very supportive of me.
Tomorrow has finally come!
About a month ago, while having my ds and his girlfriend over for dinner, he happened to take a picture of the dh and me. When I saw that picture, I gawked at what I saw! A chubby face, swollen eys, older looking skin, a blotchy face (I blame my makeup for this but still....) And then I compared that picture to the picture that was taken of my dh and I sixteen months prior when he officiated a wedding and I had been 100% raw with my food and had been drinking herbal teas for 28 days so that probably made me 90% raw. I looked healthy, happy, young, vibrant, had a good stature and had the body I had never dreamed of having! In all my years on this earth, I had NEVER had that body! And I had so much confidence, too! My family couldn't believe the difference in me. My mom didn't know what to say when she saw that picture. All she could say was 'wow' at my transformation.
I've struggled over 14 months now because I want to get back to that point and then I get depressed about it. So it seems like I say 'okay. I'll start tomorrow.' But tomorrow never comes. Coffee has come and gone in my life during that time, too. I love the smell of coffee but realize now that I don't have to drink it just because I love the smell of it. I enjoy the smell of grlled onions but that doesn't mean I have to eat them. I enjoy going out to breakfast on the weekends but I can enjoy a fruit salad there. It's not about the food anyway but about the interaction with the family. That's more important than what they put on the table.
And after that long of struggling, my dh and I were discussing this the other night, and I told him that I wanted to go back to being the vibrant, young person I was in that photo sixteen months ago. That's my goal picture now. That's how I want to go back to looking. And I told him that I had planned to start at the beginning of the year. He told me not to wait but to start now. That way, I'll be 3 weeks ahead of schedule. And I am already ahead of schedule with him buying me the necessary foods and being very supportive of me.
Tomorrow has finally come!