Company Christmas Party

[VeryBerry]

I thought I had the best excuse not to attend the company Christmas party this year. The party is the same day I am leaving for Cuba, the party is at 1:00 pm and I have to be at the airport by 3:00 pm, so I can't make it. So I told my boss that I would love to be there, but I will not be able to. So what does she do? She changes the date of the party just for me! How nice! Now I have the opportunity to feel wierd and uncomfortable in during lunch. I am even afraid to order a salad, in case it has onions.

I might fake food poisoning and use it as an excuse not to eat, although I hate laying. May be I will go see my doctor and make her write me a note that I am alergic to onions, then I can show it to the waiter, may be then they will take me seriously and actually not put onions in my salad. (There been so many times that I specifically asked for no onions, still got onions and then was sick for 3 days) I wish I could just not eat at the party, restaurant food really makes me nervous. Any other ideas?

[Petals]

O this is too good! I am going thru the same thing at my ofice. We are having a pot luck on the 14th, and I tried to get out of it but they rescheduled it ~ just for me! gee thanks.

Some of the lovely dishes being brought are : "dead chicken parts" and "more dead chicken parts" I kid you not; it is written on the wipe board. I think it may be directed at me :(


Anyway, I know how you feel, and it's even more tricky cuz you are going to a resteraunt. Bring your own food sans onion, and who cares what they think. Best wishes on that!

I am just going to bring Alissa's Waldorf salad and her onion dip for the veggie tray a co worker is bringing because the dressing with it will most likely be standard ranch.

[juliebove]

Make up a card about your allergy. This link gives an example of a "Chef Card" and you can even print one out from there to fill out and take with you:

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/food-allergy/HQ00709

Now the raw thing is another matter. You can put something about that on the card if you wish as well.

I have food allergies. My daughter has multiple food allergies. We do not stop dining out because of this. We are just super careful about where we go and what we order. I find it's best not to assume anything and to be very specific. Sometimes it even helps to write out exactly what you want. Example, green salad (lettuce, spinach, cabbage or other greens), tomatoes and cucumbers only. No onions, no croutons, no seeds, no dressing, etc. Wedge of lemon on the side.

Now if this is a buffet type thing you're going to have a harder time with the food and it's likely that you will not be able to get what you need, especially if it is being catered by an outside agency. If it is done at a restaurant, you could call ahead, explain your diet and allergies and ask if a special salad could be set aside for you. They may or may not be able to do it.

On the plus side, I've rarely found onions in my salad. Rarely found eggs either, but it did happen once and of course I didn't think to ask about it. I'm highly allergic to egg. So what did they do? Pick off the egg and return the salad to me. I didn't eat it. Like you, I don't like getting sick.

I don't know why so many companies do holiday parties at restaurants. It seems there are few people who actually want to attend the thing to begin with, but all feel they must attend or look bad. Raw diet aside, between my food allerigies and diabetes, it is hard enough for me to get a meal I can eat. My husband's comapny parties are often at places like Thai restaurants where there is nothing I can eat. I just don't go. But then...it's his company. Not mine.

The company where I worked for 17 years did a party at a restaurant just a few times. Something always went wrong. We had better luck renting a hall somewhere and having it catered. We usually had cocktails and dinner for two hours, followed by music and dancing for another two hours. This worked out very well for me. I rarely ate the dinner so I'd arrive towards the end of it and just stay for the dancing. I put in an appearance and nobody noticed I wasn't there to eat.

Better still was the party given at one of the first jobs I ever had. They merely set up an "open house" type thing in a spare room. It went on for several hours. They had punch, coffee, cookies and other snacks set out. People dropped in to pick up their paycheck, got a snack if they wanted one, then left. Almost everyone put in an appearance since they wanted their check. But nobody lingered around because there simply wasn't room for them to do it.

[James Smith]

They changed the date of the party just for you because they want you to enjoy yourself. So what are you worried about? Give the waiter detailed instructions, bring your own food, tell them you don't feel like eating and you're there just to hang out, do whatever you think will make the experience enjoyable. Why should anyone feel bad about it? Especially since they clearly want you to enjoy yourself -- they even rescheduled just for you. Just don't dwell on it or be weird about it. Say / do whatever you need, and then let the conversation at the table go its own course.

In the end, if things go horribly wrong (which they won't), you always have control over what you put in your mouth. You don't have to put there anything that you don't want to. Don't be nervous or you will freak people out. Just smile and say something general like "I don't feel like eating" or "I'm not hungry now". Then talk about something else. You think the whole world is watching what you do?? Everyone has their own problems. Maybe they'll think about you a minute or two, but that will be that. They will get back to thinking or talking about their own things.

Good luck and report back. :)

[Rawkinlocs]

They changed the date of the party just for you because they want you to enjoy yourself. So what are you worried about? Give the waiter detailed instructions, bring your own food, tell them you don't feel like eating and you're there just to hang out, do whatever you think will make the experience enjoyable. Why should anyone feel bad about it? Especially since they clearly want you to enjoy yourself -- they even rescheduled just for you. Just don't dwell on it or be weird about it. Say / do whatever you need, and then let the conversation at the table go its own course.

In the end, if things go horribly wrong (which they won't), you always have control over what you put in your mouth. You don't have to put there anything that you don't want to. Don't be nervous or you will freak people out. Just smile and say something general like "I don't feel like eating" or "I'm not hungry now". Then talk about something else. You think the whole world is watching what you do?? Everyone has their own problems. Maybe they'll think about you a minute or two, but that will be that. They will get back to thinking or talking about their own things.

Good luck and report back. :)

That's some good advice! Along with all that James said, eat before you get there so you're not hungry. But all the above ideas are good...the card, etc...if folks ask, just tell them you have food allergies. I mean, if you eat a food and have a bad reaction to it be it externally or internally, isn't that what most people equate allergies to? So technically, you're not lying - certain foods give you a bad reaction...that's all they need to know.

[Pailani]

That's some good advice!

I agree! Really, if you're enjoying yourself, chatting etc, most people won't even notice that you're not eating. I sometimes just do that with a cup of tea in my hand so it looks like I have something.

[Sharon in Colorado]

Yes, I agree with James - there have been times when I worried myself into a stupid frenzy for weeks before a function only to find out it is just no big deal. Other people at the table try to be the center of attention so I don't have to.

Why would you need a doctor's note? The waiter, establishment or your boss don't need to get an excuse or approve of your menu. You are not going to jury duty. I don't even think the President of the United States needs a doctor's note if he can't eat something - the word just gets passed along.

If they can't make you a salad with everything on the side, and there are onions in there, just don't eat it, no big deal. Eat beforehand and eat well, then just get into some deep conversation with someone about THEIR problems and your food issues won't even be an issue.

[VeryBerry]

Thanks so much for the responses. I just printed the card form the website.

The reason I wanted to get a doctors note is not because I care what anybody thinks, it is because usualy when I ask for "no onions", I often still get "just a little bit" of onions in my food, enough to make me sick for days. I just want the restaurant staff to reallize I am beeing serioud on the onion issue. If I can have have a "safe" salad I will be more then happy.

[VeryBerry]

Also most people just don't get that you can't just pick the onions out of the salad and eat the rest of it. The same way you can't just pick the meat out of the dish. Some of the onion flavour is still there, even if they cut the veggies on the same cutting board as the onions.

We are going to a pretty classy restaurant, I am hoping they would be good with this special request.

[rawpriestess]

Well, if it were me, I would think so lovingly about your boss, who went to so much trouble just for YOU. I mean really, she actually changed the date of the office party, just to accomodate YOU? Wow, I would be very flattered. That is a major compliment, she must really care about you.

Then I wouldn't worry about the food, you aren't there for the food, you are there for the company, the comradery, the fun, the joy, the gift exchange if you are doing that.

1. you can just not eat
2. you can eat only what you want
3. you can call ahead, and see if they have a special meal they can make you
4. you can eat at home before you go
5. you can take your own food and have them put it on a plate for you
6. you can just mingle, and munch on carrot sticks or whatever, and not ever sit down to eat
7. you can sit by the most flamboyant person in the place, they will certainly take all the attention off you
8. you can accept that these types of situations will happen again and again and learn to deal with them as they come up
9. you can not go, and you do not need to explain, defend or justify your actions to anyone
10. you can do something else

I recently went to a major event and I was concerned about the food.

I didn't know ahead of time where it was being held, or any of that, as it was sort of a surprise, so I went knowing that my food would be perfect and that I would have a wonderful time (law of attraction)

I went, and the first course, was the most beautiful tray of fresh fruits I'd ever seen, I ate lots, they also had some kind of cream dressing, I didn't eat

the second course was a glorious mescule mix salad with fresh raspberries and walnuts, and a RAW raspberry vinegarette dressing, I know, because I asked the chef

the third course was a wonderful cold RAW soup, I couldn't believe my eyes

and the fourth course was the meat, which I would never eat, but was full by the time it got there.

They also had a lovely desert, that may very well have been raw, but I didn't eat it, as I was stuffed. It was a fruit tart, that looked raw to me.

when I was talking with the chef about the raspberry vinegarette, he told me that he makes all of his own sauces etc, like any good chef would, and that he doesn't like to cook anything that goes onto his fruits of vegetables, as he felt it ruined the freshness of it, I found out later that the fruit dressing was made from almonds LOL

anyway, I just imagined it the way I wanted it, and didn't worry about it,

again, you are going for the comradery, NOT the food.

when I am raw, (thank goodness I am again) I don't worry about food at all, I know that I can fast or eat what I want and there is no big deal

and who cares what you eat or don't eat? I mean so what if you pick off onions, or don't eat the dressing? so what?

I've been to places and seen people send food back a dozen times, pick at this and pick at that and get all crazy, if you don't make a big deal out of it, no one else will.

Just go and have fun, and thank your boss for thinking so highly of you to make sure you could come