Midwives & Raw ~ what has been your experience?

[sherahtaylor]

This is my first raw pregnancy, and I am thinking of going the route of a midwife and home/waterbirth as opposed to what I've always done: epidural, standard hospital OB care birth.

In speaking with a midwife here in my area, Salem OR, she was saying that unfortunately not very many midwives are open to Raw eating - that they don't believe it's possible to have a healthy pregnancy without eating meat or dairy.

Since this is my first time going through a midwife, I am wondering what you have experienced. Is it hard to find a midwife that supports eating raw? What have you found, and any advice to someone who is looking for a midwife?

[light food]

Midwives always seem to be supportive of whatever you do, and I've had midwives be supportive of vegan pregnancies. But you don't need to even bring raw up, it's not really that extreme of a diet, it's just a different way of fixing the same foods that everyone else eats cooked. They will probably want to see that you are eating enough protien and calcium but otherwise, as long as you're healthy and gaining weight normally, they don't care.

One thing that I've done that screwed me was to go high raw in the middle of a pregnancy and start loosing weight. Then they got concerned, not because I went raw (they were unaware that I went high raw) but because I lost weight, I told them I was just eating better and told them what I was eating without bringing up the word "raw". There were suggestions that I would need more appointments and better monitering by them if I lost more weight by my next appointment, so I just ate fattening foods and weighed more at the next appointment and everything was OK.

If you have any problems getting midwife to go along with a vegan pregnancy, check out the book "Spiritual Midwifery" by Ina May Gaskin. In the back of the book (I had a recent copy, it might not be in the early editions) there is a page with data on 1000 vegan pregnancies and how they compare with regular pregnancies. I think it mentions that only one pregnancy had toxemia!

[jenna rose]

you might want to try going to http://www.lorenzinibaby.com They are a raw couple who have had two children. The wife's mother is a midwife. Maybe you could try getting in touch with them and seeing if they have any information for you.

[Ginger]

Ah just tell em what they want to hear & do your own thing. Less stress LOL

[Brianna]

I actually want to go to school to be a midwife. It goes so well with raw in my mind...eating naturally, having babies naturally, etc.

[Sharon in Colorado]

Knowing what I know now about the general medical/midwife/holistic/healthcare etc. community who usually won't support a 100% raw diet, I would just keep that information to myself, and if asked, share that I eat a lot of fruits and veggies.

I doubt you are going to be asked to chart what you eat. And I think your personal diet is none of anyone else's business, unless there is a clear problem with your health that is in direct correlation to your dietary intake. You could have an allergy or a Kosher/religious type of diet, and a midwife certainly wouldn't make you eat dairy or pork because of that.

Plus if the midwife puts pressure on you, you can always say that "xx" makes you sick, and you know nobody can ever make a pregnant woman eat something that makes her sick!

[b_light]

I wish I had not brought it up. I stopped eating raw because I did :( , and my midwife is vegan (I'm actually going to The Farm, the place where Ina May Gaskin-mentioned in previous post-practices). My midwife was worried I wouldn't get enough protein because I wasn't eating a whole lot of nuts (my midwife was familiar with raw because some of her family is raw). And I was dumb enough to let her talk me into it :(

Whatever you decide to do, good luck and congrats on the new baby :D

[sherahtaylor]

Well, pretty much, I won't go with a midwife who doesn't like my eating Raw. I've been in email contact with three, and have specifically asked all three what they think and if they would have a problem with me eating that way. I'm fortunate to have three to pick from. But surprisingly, all three seem to think it's fine. I don't know if they're just saying that, or dancing around the issue (one of them gave me a rather vague answer with some thing about grams of protein that I need to get per day).

But anyway, right now my main hurdle is my husband. He says having a home birth and a midwife is THE dumbest idea I've had yet. (All my 5 babies were born SAD in a hospital with an epidural) He's been pretty patient with my extreme diet change, and knows that I go 100% or nothing...I'm really stubborn by nature, and go after what I want and won't let go. So he's kind of worried about this home birth - he says there is nothing about it that he feels comfortable with. The only reason he'd even consider it is because I really want it. :(

Which is a bummer because obviously this is meant to be a really special time between husband and wife. I asked if talking to a midwife would help, and he said no. Part of it is because my 4th baby was born with an infection in her lungs and had to be put on oxygen and a breathing machine for the first 6 days of her life (full term, 9lb baby). He said if she had been a home birth, she wouldn't be alive right now. (And she's THE apple of his eye, 2 years old)

[Guppy]

Sherah - Do you think you could compromise with dh and still use the midwife and write up a very specific birth plan with what you are OK or not OK with, but still birth in the hospital? Some hospitals have some very holistic sorts of options now, with special homey birthing rooms and whirpools and things like that.

I used a midwife for my second pregnancy, but b/c my first had been a c-section, I was required to labor in the hospital with an OB overseeing the midwife. The midwife was still the one I saw for all my prenatal care and was the person who was with me during labor.

I still ended up with a second c-section but I believe that would have happened - in an ambulance emergency-style - even if I been laboring at home.

If you are totally set on a home birth, just spend some time gently educating your dh with inspiring home birth stories. Tell him how you invision things and why it is so important to you. Present a reasonable back-up plan in case there are unforseen complications. Maybe there are couples in your area who have had home births and they would be willing to talk to both of you about it?

Fighting over it isn't going to help anyone. He is just concerned for your health and that of the baby.

PS I am still impressed that this will be your sixth baby! How wonderful to have a large family.

regards,
emily

[sherahtaylor]

Emily,

Yes, I've thought of that. The main thing is that I don't want to get an epidural, yet the thought of going through the pain is hard for me since at any time I could probably "get" an epidural. I REALLY want a water labor, and I feel that this would help me both relax and also help with the pain - even if psycologically I tell myself that it will, you know?

The good thing is we're not fighting about it at all - it's just kind of an uncomfortable kind of silence on his part. But you're right and I need to remember that, he's just concerned about me & the baby.

Our hospital has the jetted tub available, but it's just a bathtub size, and that is so lame. It's not deep enough - I've tried it before, long ago, with my first. I got out of that tub so fast because it helped NOT at all. But also...that WAS 7 years ago and they've built a new birthing wing at the hospital, so I should go check it out, I guess.

[Guppy]

OK good. So you need to go find a birthing center that has tubs you like!

Did you speak to the midwives you interviewed as to what they do when the mother is begging for drugs but has previously said she didn't want any? I have a good friend who used the same midwife as me. She has been very anti-drugs and was always very clear about it. Then during labor she invariably starts to ask for them. But b/c her dh and her midwife know how she really feels about the drugs, they help and support her to go without. She has birthed 3 children this way.

I think it's funny that you are scared after 5 other births - you are an old pro! But from one mother to another, I totally understand why ;)

Have fun with all these terrific new options!
emily

[Pierre]

But anyway, right now my main hurdle is my husband. He says having a home birth and a midwife is THE dumbest idea I've had yet. (All my 5 babies were born SAD in a hospital with an epidural) He's been pretty patient with my extreme diet change, and knows that I go 100% or nothing...I'm really stubborn by nature, and go after what I want and won't let go. So he's kind of worried about this home birth - he says there is nothing about it that he feels comfortable with. The only reason he'd even consider it is because I really want it. :(
Ooh, I feel for you! I'll pray for you - please keep us posted how it goes! I know some women who have given birth at home - even without a midwife - and that's what I want, but I don't know where to find a woman who's willing ;)

[Que]

Hi Sherah

If you have 3 midwives supportive of raw that is great. From my understanding there aren't many that do. I looked into midwives when I first found out I was pregnant and never really pursued it, this is my first and although I have an amazing doctor who is in total favour of the most natural childbirth possible, when a friend of mine announced her pregnancy a couple of months ago and right away found the perfect midwife I was a little disappointed with myself. However, she has some medical problems and also is not raw, she is also having her baby in the hospital. Now I understand from my doctor that hospitals here in Canada and hospitals in the US are quite different when it comes to birthing but in the hospital where I'll be staying (BC Womans) women are almost rewarded for not having drugs and for pursuing the most natural birth possible. I would ask the midwives what your options are besides birthing at home because maybe there is a place that your husband and you can agree on. Maybe look up BC Womans and check out their birthing information and use that as a reference? BC Woman's also recommends a birth plan and they give you paperwork to make that plan in advance. I'm doing one to ensure that the birth goes according to my standards. I believe Midwives are more into birth plans and if you had a midwife at the hospital she will maintain that plan when you aren't quite yourself. Anyway, I think you're doing great. I admire that you have stuck to raw but then you seem a lot more experienced than I am when it comes to babies. I hope this helps. Keep us posted.

Que

[Ginger]

Pierre that is the only way for me & because I was interFEARed with durring my unnasisted homebirth it caused me to end up an emergency c-section in a hospital where my child was given formula & a vaccine I never consented to. Long story, anyway.. I just wanted to say that is cool to see a guy who is comfortable with natural birth. I never met anyone so far that was. You rock! :D

[Sharon in Colorado]

sherah if your other pregnancies were full on cooked or SAD and this one will be raw, there is no doubt in my mind that this one will be much easier on you and the baby.

Plus you can tell certain things about the birth based on your pregnancy along the way.

If you are not well, having a hard time with it, etc. that is an indication that you'll want to be in a hospital in case of complications.

Maybe you can be near a hospital or at the very least go to a birthing facility where they are prepared for anything that could come up.

The last thing you'd want to do is be in direct disagreement with your beloved about this. He is concerned, and maybe just not confident enough that this will flow through. If he's that stuck on it, maybe you can come up with a compromise.

All the best to you!

[adrienne]

Brianna,
You would make a wonderful midwife! I've met you at HHI last March and you have a very calm, sweet energy about you. Go for it!
Hope to see you back there this winter!
Adrienne in Boston

[cenaw/10]

Sherah, My first baby was a hospital birth. I wanted a home birth and my husband was not for it. Everything went fine with baby #1, so when I became pregnant with #2 (actually they have real names...) I brought up my desire to homebirth again and convinced him to interview the midwife. Oh My Gosh! He asked her a million questions, good questions. She talked with us for 1 1/2 hours and answered all his questions. We had the baby at home, and I knew he was going along with it to be supportive...but after the birth, when the daddy is on the phone calling Grandma's and stuff with the announcement I heard him tell his brother, "The midwife and homebirth was so great! It was so much more relaxed and comfortable for Cena and I. Barring complications I wouldn't want her to do it any other way." Then I knew he was sold! We have since had 9 homebirths with the same midwife.
I'm praying he'll at least talk to a midwife and get his fears out in questions. He just wants it to be safe for you, he loves you...
PS I agree that you need not tell that you are raw if they give you guff. It's your body, your baby.

[AvoMama]

How far are you from a hospital? Most procedures can't be done instantly, so if something did happen, the midwif could call ahead while you were on teh way and they'd be prepared. That way maybe your hubby would feel more secure.


Good Luck!

Beth