I need help!

[Mary]

Okay... confession time... :eek: please do not read further if you are having cooked food temptations!

My husband wanted to treat me to a birthday dinner this evening (my birthday is tomorrow, but we needed to celebrate it today), and he brought home my favorite Indian food tonight... no, he didn't intentionally sabotage me... I asked for it! :( It was vegan, but it was cooked. And, I had champagne too! I didn't overeat, but now I'm feeling overwhelming guilt at having failed at being raw. I ate 100% raw for breakfast and lunch, as usual.

I am having a really hard time with major, major food cravings! I have been eating 100% raw religiously for the past three months, but in the last couple of days, all I could think of was all the foods I have given up. Yes, I *do* find a lot of raw foods very satisfying and delicious, but the idea of never having my favorite Indian food again, has been just overwhelming lately.

I am thinking that for this to work for me in the long haul, before I just go nuts and give up raw foods entirely, is to eat 100% raw on most days, and allow myself the occasional cooked meal. Even before going raw, I would eat about 80% raw foods.

I hope I'm not discouraging anyone posting this, but I am asking for help! I know that eating 100% raw will give me maximum health benefits, but I'm having a hard time with the idea that I will never be able to enjoy some of my favorite cooked foods anymore. I have not been successful in creating raw versions of some of my favorite foods, though I'm sure other people have been able to do so.

Help! I need some encouragement to keep going 100%! Any advice, tips, and prayer/positive energy will be very much appreciated!

Mary

[codajess]

YOU! *glare*

I've eaten caesar salad EVERY. DAY. for the past like 3 weeks.


:) Actually you and I are kind of in the same place. Lately i've been thinking "Why don't I just eat mostly raw, then eat cooked once in a while, if I go out to a restaurant with someone or a get together or whatever."

I'm still in that mindset right now.

I also know that when I screw up and eat cooked...i tend to KEEP eating cooked, and it's incredibly hard to get back to raw.

I tell myself I'll just make sure all my cooked food is vegan-friendly and it won't be that bad. But then I realize that I like things like potato chips. lol. And those are TERRIBLE. Alas! I am stumped!

*sits down in the boat with her and waits for an answer*



*eats caesar salad while waiting* :o

[PDMagnusen]

Mary, I just wrote a similar post to eatyourbroccoli :) .
We are not perfect and we all slip at times. Every day is a new day to get back on track. I actually don't even like saying "slip ups" or "falling of the wagon" as it relates to eating cooked food because quite honestly...all you can do is the best you can do that DAY and at that MOMENT!!! And we will not always be in the same place as we were the day before and won't be the same place as we could be the following day. We can't beat ourselves up about this. Raw is in your heart, and I can tell from your post that it is.
Now, to your other point...I personally don't like to take vows:
"I will NEVER", "I will ALWAYS", because it's way too much pressure, and to be quite honest, I don't feel that I'm being fair to myself. Every day I wake up with an "intention" to be 100% raw. Every day I try my best to BE 100% raw. If I end up not following through with this, then I try not to be too hard on myself. You don't have to look at it like you can never eat the cooked food you used to enjoy. Those words "never" and "always" can be hard to swollow at first. They are so...permanent :). I honestly feel that we all individually have to find a balance that works for us and our bodies. I've been 100% (with a few cooked meals) for the past year. I don't know what your balance should be. Maybe it's 80% raw at first..maybe it's 100%. Only you would know, but what I DO know is that if you keep at it you WILL eventually find your balance. Until then...don't be too hard on yourself. You didn't FAIL. You didn't CHEAT. Who's keeping score, anyway? Just allow yourself the opportunity to grow with raw -- you will get to where you need to be.

[mongomango]

I believe that our cravings sometimes come from parasites within our bodies that interact with our mind. We have stopped eating the things that are their foods of choice, and they are trying to get those things back into the body. If you do not believe this is possible and that parasites can not affect your behavior, please say so instead of dismissing it and I will post other things showing that they can and do.

I also believe that the first time we stop eating raw, these parasites don't know what's going on and so the assault is not as severe as the next time. When you go off and start eating what they want you to eat, and then start restricting those items again from your diet because you're trying to do raw again, they will recognize the beginning signs of their famine and will do whatever it is that they do to cause you to seek out the foods that they want.

Maybe you could try setting a date. Say..ok, in two weeks I can eat such and such...and so this gives you something to look forward to... and an achievable goal as we can usually wait 2 weeks or whatever time frame you choose...and then when 2 weeks rolls around you may find that you don't really need or want the thing you are craving...and can say..ok..in two weeks from this date now, if I want such and such I can have it. If the date rolls around during a time you are feeling particularly weak..it may spell disaster. But I have found that when the day rolls around I don't need the thing at that moment and can put it off.

I will tell you that when I became raw I also instituted very stringent fasting regimens as I wanted to clean my body out quickly. I would eat raw, water fast for weeks, eat raw, water fast etc. At the end of this time period I decided as celebration I would just have a cooked food that I loved. I was thoroughly dismayed and shocked when I did...and my body rejected it. It tasted like drywall and I could barely swallow it. It was like eating charcoal from a fire or something and the absolute dryness of the food amazed me. My body did not recognize it as food in any way shape or form. I was stunned and a bit upset...and so I tried over and over again with all the cooked foods that I had loved. Same thing. When you reach a point in clearing out your body, you will no longer have any cravings for these foods, and while you will have fond memories of them...which are usually based in emotional things and not the food itself...you will have absolutely no desire for them...and even if you do and you succumb to the temptation, you will find that your body will stop you from eating them.

[luckitri]

That is totally possible mongomango. I noticed years ago how alot of Hollywoods scifi movies borrowed from nature and the parasite thing that has been popular for years and redone so many times I am sure is no exception. Yeast is a parasite, they don't know if it is a plant or an animal, colonizes the body and creates cravings - does it group-think like ants and bees?

What you wrote about your reaction to cooked food is such a good thing for me to read. I do not have the discipline to fast - did you have to work a job during that time? I get so spacy and kinda dizzy that I don't trust myself to perform well at work. I just try to juice fast on the weekends which doesn't work because it is also my biggest temptation time.

[codajess]

I wish my cooked foods that I've eaten (not since august, by the way) tasted like drywall! :p I wouldn't be havin a problem if it did!

[DavidZaneMason]

Opinion:

-There IS a level of raw food that you ARE comfortable with right now. THAT is your starting point - to stretch from there. Don't hold yourself to some ideal or some guru's idea of what is right for you.....and don't allow your own brain to torture you with stuff that you are not prepared to do willingly. The battle of 'wanting' cooked food is the internal battle that everyone will have to win eventually. No shaky discipline can ever beat out a deep motivation.

-David Mason

[mongomango]

That is totally possible mongomango. I noticed years ago how alot of Hollywoods scifi movies borrowed from nature and the parasite thing that has been popular for years and redone so many times I am sure is no exception. Yeast is a parasite, they don't know if it is a plant or an animal, colonizes the body and creates cravings - does it group-think like ants and bees?

What you wrote about your reaction to cooked food is such a good thing for me to read. I do not have the discipline to fast - did you have to work a job during that time? I get so spacy and kinda dizzy that I don't trust myself to perform well at work. I just try to juice fast on the weekends which doesn't work because it is also my biggest temptation time.


I did have to work. I do not know that I would now do a strictly water fast as I did and would probably start with a juice fast. Bodies now are under so much more assault from toxins that it is a gentler way to detox...so I would probably do some extensive juice fasting and then move on to water after a bit. I have always been all or nothing and very reckless with my body lol, and would not encourage someone to do what I did then today.

As for the working, I found the first 3 days of fasting were difficult for me, and after day 3, sometimes day 4 that subsided, and then I had no difficulties until about 21 days when I would start getting weak. Well...there would be occasional days when I would be having some mild detox symptoms in between, but nothing that I couldn't handle. At 3 weeks I usually threw in the towel because I work a physical job and I simply couldn't .. heh heh...or wouldn't continue the fast while I was feeling so poorly and still working.

As to yeast, I have theories about it...but one thing is fact. They are now observing in animals marked and detrimental changes in behaviour of animals when they are infected with particular parasites. These changes are always things beneficial to the parasite, so if it's happening with animals, it's happening with people. Unlike animals; however, we have greater ability to reason and to assert our will and I believe CAN overcome all such things.

[mongomango]

I wish my cooked foods that I've eaten (not since august, by the way) tasted like drywall! :p I wouldn't be havin a problem if it did!

Yah..haha...I was upset. It disturbed me greatly to know that I had been so very deceived. I looked at it as these things were so intimate to me, foods that I had loved and depended on and had given me such pleasure...and it was a total lie. I tried and tried to find something that I could eat without gagging that wasn't raw because I didn't want it to be the truth. But it was.

[misslinda]

Oh Mary, first of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm curious, why did you ask for the [cooked] food ? Do you think the "festive" moment stimulated a feeling?
I know for myself, when I was in my 2-3 month 100% raw, my sis and I would got to the HFS together and sit in the deli....I felt so "social" with her that I would almost catch myself making food choices based on feeling.

what are you afraid will happen if you never have [cooked] vegetarian Indain food again?

Don't shoot yourself in the foot! It's the many facets of progressing in raw.

;)

[rawbeliever]

Hey Mary,

I second Miss Linda's Happy Birthday wishes! May you celebrate many more!

You know, I find that my cravings intensify at the third month mark of being 100%. I don't know why...I'm cruising along fine for one month, two months, then Boom! Every cooked thing I see smells and looks yummy. I figure that maybe I'm about to go through a new level of detox, and maybe it's my mind's last ditch effort to return to the way "we" were? I don't know, because I've never gotten past the third month mark without "reverting." I intend to get past the third month mark this time, but it's taken me a few tries to become conscious of when I enter the "danger" zone. I guess my point is don't worry about it, and don't be hard on yourself. I'm impressed that you didn't overeat. If it had been me, I'd have scarfed down all that nan by myself, and I wouldn't have shared, either. :) Now that you've been raw so long, and you've experienced some of the benefits, you'll find it easier to return to it. As Ann Wigmore says, it's not what you do every once in a while that counts, but what you do every day. Again, Happy Birthday! And I hope you enjoyed every drop of that champagne. :)

[Adrian]

Happy Birthday Mary!! Hope you enjoyed your special day and your Indian Food. I had Red Velvet Cake yesterday- and I really wanted to taste it, so I ate a small slice after being raw for almost 2 months. So don't feel bad about eating the cooked food. You have to do what makes you happy, guilty or not about not being 100% successful in your goals. We all have to live with the choices we make.

On my birthday last month a client surprised me with an ice cream cake just after about a week raw, but I couldn't refuse it. So I just picked up and got back on track after the ice cream cake. What else can you do.

You have to decide what you want and make it happen. We are all human and make mistakes, and sometimes regret choices we made. I know I do all the time... "I wish I would have..., or I should have..., or why did I ..."

I just finished reading Alissa's book over the weekend, and I guess if you did have the occasional cooked meal, just be prepared to always have the cravings for cooked food. She said it's easier to go cold turkey, but some people choose not to. So...do what works for you. Not all of us are 100%, but you decide what you want to do and go for it :)

And about Indian food, I think the Carrot Pecan Burgers you inspired me to make in an early thread, maybe the August Challenge, taste like Indian food to me(I guess it is the spices). Those are one of my favorites now. I love and miss other foods too, but hopefully I can stay raw.

[romanticsnet]

I believe I read somewhere that it says that the cooked food cravings do not pass until after the 6th month... Every day is a journey. Just keep going. I stumble on occasion... and I fall like th rest... but I keep picking myself back up. I am currently juice fasting... and am doing a 21 day cleanse. This was preceded by "healthier" cooked foods... and then I ended up having raw breakfasts, raw lunches... and potato chips for dinner before my 15% cooked vegan meal.... A lot of it was frustration from cooking for my SAD meat eating family... and feeling like I needed somthing salty.

You are right about missing some of your fave cooked items. Rice is a HUGE one for me as I am half Asian. Funny... kim-chi does not taste the same without the rice. :(

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!