An ED Discussion

[AliCat]

When I joined this board 3 weeks ago I was catching up on old posts. I read a few posts about people eating raw and having eating disorders. It was mentioned that it would be great to have either an ongoing post or an ED forum where we could all post.

I am having a particularly rough day and could really use some shoulders and ears from people who can understand what Im going through...was this post or forum ever created? Thanks :o

[rawfigure]

Alicat , it was not. I know if you are having a tough time and want support just post a thread here. I think i was the one with question about ED online support.

I am technically "recovered" from my ED that bloomed 25 yrs ago. I still have some underlying feeling that crop up sometimes, even now I am facing and dealing with. I know for myself it hard to discuss some aspects of ED on a forum. It can be very personal so maybe that is why there is not a great response to this.

There are a quote a few girls here who are willing to give you support in a thread or in email.

Feel free to share. :)

[AliCat]

RawFigure - thank you so much for your reponse. I think I am a bit weary of posting such personal info. Not that I think I will be judged cause the people here have been nothing but supportive towards me. I just think people who have never had to deal with an ED just dont understand and think its a very easy "choice" to just not be that way. I also feel like all Ive done since join here is whine about how Ive gained weight on this "diet". I did not choose to become raw only for weight loss reasons but it is high on my priorities. My self esteem is already bad and with 7.5 lbs weight GAIN its getting worse. I strugle daily to stay raw and not quit cause I KNOW it is the best thing for me.

EVERYONE (family and friends) is curious to know how Ive gained eating fruits and veggies. I was used to restricting and eating 800 to 1000 cals a day. Now I think Im close to double that and its makes me uncomfortable to eat that much but I get so hungry just eating fruits and veggies. I have given up (temporarily) nuts and I try to eat fruit only in the early part of the day and STILL I cannot lose what Ive gained. I had an unfortuate few days of eating raw but prepackaged snacks so Im rebounding from that too. Im just very frustrated feeling so heavy. I think cause originally I only had 10 lbs to lose (now 17.5) I was so close to a goal and frustrated that so many have lost so much. I feel like maybe Im doing this all wrong.

I also have a chronic back condition and its hard for me to work out regularly but Ive been doing cardio at least 3 days a week and weights 3 days a week. Its frustrating cause Im a personal trainer (retired since my back issues) and I KNOW what I need to do and cant do it for fear of winding up in bed for a week.

On top of it all my stomach has not been right since starting this and I must be an idiot cause the food combining chart confuses me :confused:

I feel a bit lost and in need of some mentoring yet dont want to seem like a needly life sucking person. Its hard for me to ask for help and not feel bad for putting someone out <shrug>

BLAGH...Im sorry for whining again. Thank for listening

[cassidy]

Hey there Ms Alicat,
I have a feeling it takes our bodies a while to get used to all raw. Often feel bloated, hungry after I just ate, weird hormonal like cramps, headaches... I know it will all fade after a while. You just have to stick with it or you will have to go over it all again every time you start over.
As for the weight gain - Are you overwieght? Is your body at a good weight for you? I know you said you need to loose, but sometimes we can have a clouded idea of what we should look like according to society.
If not, then just wait. I have read posts where it has taken people a VERY long time to loose... but it happens eventually. At least you are giving your body everything it needs and the best possible food you can. You can feel good about that.
Ther is nothing to feel guilty about.
There are a lot of people on this board who have experience with EDs and are willing to lend an eat. It is OK to share here - people are very understanding and nonjudgemental.
This is a very special group of people.
Negative emotions fuel eating disorders. Know that you are doing the best you can do for your body right now. You have to take baby steps. If you are too tired to do all of the excercise you think you should be doing... wait, starting raw might just be wiping you out. You are making BIG changes - it is hard on you mind and body. Give yourself a break and listen to your heart.
You are doing GREAT!
Thanks for sharing - I know it is difficult.

[jaurequi]

Alicat,

I'm not sure what type of eating disorder you have/had, but, it's not only very common, but also most likely that one will put weight on after deprivation, no matter what it is, even just water. Your body, when deprived, will hang on to any little thing it can get because it has been forced into starvation mode. It has learned to adapt to this. It does not know when it will be fed again, so it stores the food for energy. Think of it as hibernating.
Good news is, this is only temporary. Once your body then gets used to regular doses of food (best way is to eat smaller meals often to get through this type of situation), it will no longer feel threatened and not hold on to calories and store it as fat.
Does this make sense? I hope so; it's quite logical.

But I worry you cutting back on things is just a different route to the same destination: Try eating what you want, in moderation, in smaller (not tiny) amounts throughout the day, and NOT to fullness (this will cause bloating, uncomfortableness and anxiety). Eat mostly fruit and vegetables and small amounts of whole fats like nuts and seeds (think of them as accents instead of meals in themselves: toss some in a salad, for example).

You have to get over this hurdle by going through this uncomfortable time of gaining some weight; but it will eventually be released and you will lose it. Don't fight your body; she wants to be fed, she needs the nutrition. Treat her well and she'll show appreciation by functioning properly and looking good and healthy. :)

Best,

[AliCat]

I am classified as Ed-Nos (E.D non specified) which is annoying. Its like if your not anorexic or bulimic your put in this category. I restrict binge or compulsively overeat. I havent done this in awhile and its been pretty easy to keep a hand on it since I started RAW (minus the one prepackaged raw food romp).


Ya know what I did today...I followed the food combining chart more closely than I ever have and GONE was the bloating, cravings and discomfort. I think thats my ticket.

I am VERY uncomfortable in this place...gaining weight but whats the choice. Im hooked on this raw life and I dont think I can go back so I guess I have to follow this through to the end :) thanks for all your support you guys

[eatyourbroccoli]

On top of it all my stomach has not been right since starting this and I must be an idiot cause the food combining chart confuses me :confused:
if i can offer anything ive learned its that in order to be successful with turning your ed around you have to first and foremost learn to love yourself.

dont you worry about numbers or weight or outside influences..focus on loving yourself, accepting yourself, above at or below your ideal weight.

so far as your tummy issues..im not sure if it is constipation or the other way, but one thing that really helped me personally to start getting my digestion back on track as i began to heal from digestive self-abuse (holistic self-abuse, really) was the incorporation of enzyme-rich foods (papaya and pineapple mostly) AND i also bought these enzyme supplements at trader joes and i would pop one before a meal i knew might cause me some disharmonious after-effects (nuts, mainly). i know they aren't/weren't raw..but they helped me quite a bit.

just a thought :)

[rawfigure]

EVERYONE (family and friends) is curious to know how Ive gained eating fruits and veggies. I was used to restricting and eating 800 to 1000 cals a day. Now I think Im close to double that and its makes me uncomfortable to eat that much but I get so hungry just eating fruits and veggies. I have given up (temporarily) nuts and I try to eat fruit only in the early part of the day and STILL I cannot lose what Ive gained.

I certainly understand. And I would suggest the reason for the weight gain is a slowed metabolism. I am not going to suggest you cut back only you can determine what you can and will do...but that being said I am living proof that if you restrict cals for extended periods of time you WILL adversly affect your metabolism.

I ate less than a 1000 cals a day for MANY years. Then when I got out of college I ate just a little more and quickly went from 100 to 112 pds...to think I was bummed about that ! Then weight training for almost 20 years I continue to eat little, 1200-1400 aday and weight 129 ish now. I gained 10 pds of muscle over 18 years and that was not eating that much. A life time of restrictive eating has compromised my MET (metabolism) for my life to date. I struggle to lose 5 pds. I ran 100 miles in June thinking I may lose a pd..none !! My body has learned to be soooo efficient . I would guess you are similar. I do not know how young you are but the sooner you catch and stop dieting , the better of you are.

I am 45 and for last two years I have been eating slightly more, continuing to train and do cardio...and my weight has been stable. I am increasing fruits and veggies, in attempt to get used to eating more. My hope is to correct my MET (from a lifetime of restrictive eating) on this RAW diet (I am one yr. now)

SO please do not restrict to much and try if you can to be active. Eat fruits veggies to your hearts desire and be patient. It takes time to heal....

hope that helps.

Leslie

[Rmiller]

Alicat,

I'm currently in the process of recovery after 10 long painful years of having anorexia. I agree that it would be helpful to have an ED forum. If you would support each other through the process, I would love to do that with you. If you e-mail me your phone number, I don't mind calling you as well. You can e-mail me at lisamadam@gmail.com...

Look forward to possibly hearing from you,

Lisa

[AliCat]

Broccoli - I TRULY know that I need to learn to love myself. I wish it were that simple...as saying it and making it so. It goes so much deeper than that. Its something Ive been struggling with for the better part of 15 years. its so sad when I write it out like that...so much wasted time.

so far as your tummy issues <blushing> its *ahem* not constipation but Ive been OK for the last 2 days. I think its because Ive REALLY been strict on food combining. Maybe thats it? Can you give me the name of the enzyme pills from trader joes. Id be very interested in them. Thank you so much for your advice!!!

Leslie - Im sure my metabolism is slowed but more likely from my hypothyroid. I might have restricted but I was also a binger (something Ive not done too bad with since going raw) and my cal intake daily was either too much or too low. Im sure my systems are so wacky but the fact that Ive gained weight and went up a WHOLE SIZE is freaking me out a LOT!

Im so sorry you have had issues with your metabolism. I hope your journey on RAW foods helps you out. Thank you so much for sharing this...it really helps me put things in perspective.

Lisa - Im gonna go email you right now. :)