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View Full Version : I'm sick of thinking about my diet!



SNMB
08-07-2006, 08:38 AM
Arrrrrrgh! Really, so sick of it. High fruit, high fat, just eat raw, whole food vegan, WHICH IS BEST FOR ME? I think that psychologically, whole food vegan is best for me. I remember eating that way and glowing and feeling healthy and not at all deprived. I was overweight but just by 20 pounds or so and I was losing it slowly. But then my vanity took over. I undertook a 10 day water fast which I broke horribly and did not supplement with probiotics. I gave myself a lovely case of candida overgrowth - ringworm, recurrent yeast infections, itchy ears, the whole thing. This means I can no longer thrive on a cooked vegan diet. Then comes raw. I love so many different raw foods, but this definitely includes both fruit and more fatty things. I've heard that the "Just Eat Raw" approach might fight off candida eventually but I'm now in a relationship and waiting that long while dealing with yeast infections is even less appealing than dealing with them by myself. The only way I've had success is by following a high fruit/no overt fat diet but let me tell you it drives me INSANE. I have to eat constantly, not to keep myself from getting hungry but to keep myself from thinking too hard about all the things I'm not eating. I don't have the money for that, as I'm in school. I started taking some probiotics yesterday (finally) and am hoping that'll help.

I can't help but think that I've willed these ailments on myself, kind of like the "You Name It, You Claim It" thread. It's a combination of the physical and the mental. I was never happy with being overweight, so I starved myself and got the skinniest I've ever been. Then I developed food issues, constantly overeating awful foods, feeling incredibly anxious when I tried to limit myself. Somewhere in there I decided to follow a fairly healthy vegan diet. I had no concept of raw vs. cooked but I ate LOTS of lightly cooked greens and veggies and I felt GREAT. That's another thing that I can't help thinking: Before I had read so much about the raw lifestyle, I didn't think about it. When I ate steamed or lightly sauteed greens, I felt like THAT was the best thing I could do for my body. Thing is, it WAS! At the time, that was the best I could do for my body. But now, if I ate some food like that, I wouldn't be able to stop thinking about how it wasn't at all ideal and therefore I'd be signaling to my body that THIS IS BAD FOOD, REJECT! Anyway, ate a healthy, low-fat vegan diet, felt good but wanted to lose weight faster so I started fasting, which led to binging and you get the idea.

Sorry, this is a total stream-of-consciousness thread.

These are the things I have to deal with:

1. Candida - I've read through all the threads and have seen a lot of speculation about Cousens' approach and a lot of success stories with Graham's approach. I could handle a few flareups but this really needs to go.

2. Overeating - In some of RawPriestess' threads, she talks about food having been her lover and how that is changing. I want SO much for this to happen for me and I know that releasing all of the guilt associated with food is a huge part. Being "allowed" to eat as much as I want, when I want (if it's raw) without worrying about it making me heavier would be so good for my mind, I think. I'm not too comfortable with myself now but I've got a great boyfriend who likes me how I am and this is HUGE. I want to lose weight but no extreme approaches for me. No more fasting. (Long-term, that is. Mentally and physically, my body does well with one day fasts.)

3. Money - As mentioned above, I'm a college student. I get $400 per month for food, a FORTUNE compared to the less than $100 I see many of my friends living off of, but not much when it comes to raw food. I know I can sprout and eat lots of bananas and all of those things but when I'm dealing with the overeating thing, it would be nice to have whatever I want available to me.

4. Exercise - This ties into money. I live in Portland. I've got my bike that I ride, I walk a lot. I'd love to start running but I don't have the motivation. Some sort of hot yoga really appeals to me, and the benefits sound great. There's a yoga studio about six blocks from my apartment (With a raw restaurant in there too!) that offers hot yoga every day and an unlimited monthly pass is $130, probably closer to $100 with my student discount. I think something that is close to me, that I GO TO on a regular basis would work really well, but the only place this money would come from is my food budget. Now, $300 per month or $75 per week is totally doable if I'm eating high raw but supplementing with some beans and rice, which I think would be a comfortable level for me to stick to and a reasonably healthy diet for a college student but then there's the damned CANDIDA ISSUE! ARGH!

So yeah, I guess I'm not asking for anyone's advice unless you just HAPPEN to have been in this situation before and found something that worked for you. Thanks for letting me rant.

Dimond
08-07-2006, 08:55 AM
You sound like you know what works for your body, so just continue to do it, whether that means having some cooked or not. Obsessing is good for any of us. I have candida issues myself so I get how annoying it is. You're on the right track with how to take care of you and that's the most important things. Good luck and have fun with it instead. :D

Lay-Lay
08-07-2006, 10:01 AM
Hey we are here for you cheering you on. I sure am rooting for you! Keep on learning your body and keep it simple! No reason to obsess about it.

chilove
08-07-2006, 10:09 AM
Hello there,

I believe in Dr Graham's type of diet, so I'm not going to encourage you to give that up. :-) It will heal your candida and keep it away. I just wanted to let you know that it does get easier! You will get more used to eating this way.

A suggestion on the yoga, speak to the owner of the studio and see if they will let you take classes at no charge in exchange for working for them. I currently do cleaning at a yoga studio in exchange for free unlimited classes. It is great!

I am also a student and $100 per week for food is totally do-able if you eat lots of bananas and don't insist on getting all organic. DON"T shop at grocery stores! Only shop at produce stores and Asian markets, they are much, much cheaper. Make friends with produce managers and tell them that you are a raw foodist on a budget and ask them for discounts when you buy by the case and ask them to set aside the "less than perfect and overly ripe (usually perfectly ripe)" stuff for you. You can get awesome deals on that stuff. I've gotten bananas for as low as 10cents per lb.

You can do this!!! You will be feeling great in no time. :-)

All the best,

Audrey
www.rawhealing.com

fikustree
08-07-2006, 01:01 PM
to get started running you might want to try the Coach-to-5K plan, I have a lot of friends that have had sucess with it.

As far as the money thing goes, I hear ya! One thing I did was join a CSA program (Community supported agriculture) where you pay them money to run there farm and they give you a box of organic vegetables every week in return, it is wonderful because you eat and season, and stay local and save money. There is probably one in your area.

Another great place to stock up in things is Asian markets. I have found things like young cocunuts that are 70% cheaper than my organic market.

Good Luck!

metta13
08-07-2006, 02:21 PM
Hi Paige,
I live in the Portland area too (isn't it wonderful?) Candida can be nasty if it becomes systemic. We are lucky to have the National College of Naturopathic Medicine here (NCNM) and they have student rates....can get really excellent advice on a candida diet and maybe supplements. Also, I recently went to New Season's market for a raw foods class....and it was taught by a Naturopath....it was great! Her website is www.nwrejuvenate.com
I'm sure she can help you with the raw food/ whole vegan issues, along with the candida.

good luck,
metta

Coriander74
08-07-2006, 02:53 PM
I agree with the "listen to your body". You know what feels best for you :D I'm behind you a zillion percent!

Boz
08-07-2006, 03:39 PM
SNMB,

I totally know what you are going through with the mental/phsycological aspect of all of this. I was doing awesome until like last month, now I feel like I've been thinking about food all the time. I hate these feelings that I have because I feel like I have created an even worse relationship with food than I originally started with.

I would love to see you succeed, in addition to myself. The best advice I can give to you is to do what you were doing before. As in, go back to the low-fat vegan diet you were on before, if it makes you feel optimal. Making it a learning/transitional phase and try your best to calm your mind from the feelings and thoughts that currently consume it. Easier said than done, but know you aren't the only one going through it.

I truly appreiciate Audrey's advice, seeing that she has come so far on this journey. Once you are ready, take that leap. Till then, don't suffer along the way. I wish I could be this sympathetic and help myself in the same way I offer you advice, but we all know that usually isn't the case :(

By the way, what exactly is ringworm, and how did you know you had it? symptoms?

Best of luck to you

desertroadrunner
08-07-2006, 06:46 PM
What is hot yoga?

SNMB
08-07-2006, 07:03 PM
Thanks everyone, for your support and advice.

Metta - Yes, I LOVE Portland. Thanks for those links and things. I'll check 'em out.

Boz - Thanks for the support. Ringworm is actually a fungus, not a worm at all and it's characterized by a "red raised itchy patches with defined edges" that grow in a ring shape. I've got them on my arms. (I took that from the Wikipedia article on it. The picture on that article looks nothing like mine but I've seen others that do.)

DesertRoadRunner - By "Hot Yoga" I mean something like Bikram or power yoga that is performed in a room heated to around 100 degrees, so you sweat a lot and get rid of all sorts of toxins. If you search for Bikram Yoga on this site you'll find some threads filled with praise.

spicyfull
08-07-2006, 08:37 PM
Hang in there............

beelzebubble
08-07-2006, 08:55 PM
i so understand where you are at on so many levels. the other night i was stymied in my dinner plans by a not ripe pineapple and a too ripe mango. knowing that i have to provide dinner for my family, i scoured the fridge and cupboards looking for something to make. i ended up settling on making homemade tomato sauce with homegrown basil and zucchini (i'm high raw, not 100%) and brown rice pasta. the entire time i was thinking i shouldn't be eating this crap. whereas, even a year ago, i would have thought, "well here's a relatively wholesome dinner". it messes with your head.

anyway, here's a thought, do you qualify for food stamps? if you qualify for work study through your school there's a chance that you might. it might be worth looking into. be well.