why is this so hard?

[purtyflowrr]

I just returned from a 3 week vacation in NYC. It was purely heaven!!!! I was eating raw gourmet food everyday, shopping at all the fresh food markets and doing awesome. While I was there, I lost a little over 10 pounds and I looked soooooo radiant. Not one person I came into contact that I know didn't not make a comment. That was such a horrible sentence...anyway, everyone noticed. I have been home for a week and have just been eating horribly. In my head, it is a constant battle. I tell myself....raw isn't something I can do forever, I need to find a plan that I can do forever. But, then I think to when I did weight watchers and I never felt on weight watchers how I do on raw. But it is so emotionally hard for me. Sigh. I want to do this so badly, but I sabatoge myself. What can I do to do this for good?

[Coriander74]

hugs hugs hugs!!!!!

You can do anything forever if you set your mind to it. Let your body help you remember the way you felt eating raw, and the way you feel eating SAD.
Do you have raw support where you live now?
What do you think is blocking you from starting an all-raw lifestyle where you are now?

[purtyflowrr]

The only thing that is stopping me from being successful with this is myself. That is it. I think too much about it. I try to make excuses about how I could easily lose weight doing something else without making so many "sacrifices". But then I want to feel the way that raw makes me feel and I can only do that by going raw and sticking to it. I think it is also SUPER hard cause I live with my parents and there is so much junk around. But, I have to stop making excuses. This is ridiculous. Starting right now, I have to stop this cycle.

[RawFoodieMom]

I can really relate. And thinking about what might be sabotaging you and what I can suggest to help you is helping me too! :)

It sounds like maybe you have a lot of SAD food around you in your daily life that's tempting you. Either in your house or at work. And if so is there anything you can do do get rid of it or lessen it? If you live with SAD eaters, can you separate the SAD food into a separate cupboard so that you don't have to see it a lot, etc...

Did you take any photos of your radiant self while in NYC? If so, post them in the kitchen and maybe at work so it will be a constant reminder of how great RAW is! :)

Debra

[RawFoodieMom]

Hmmm... Living with your parents must be hard if they are cooked eaters.

You mentioned the word "sacrifice" though. That is something you really need to try and change about your mindset. Concentrate on finding raw foods that you absolutely love that you can eat and feel totally satisified that you're not missing out on anything.

[jiujitsugirl]

hey purty i was going raw a few months back and it was a complete yoyo disaster, now its nothing sure its been 4 days but ive read so much and ive kind of just let my body guide me, dont make it too complicated read a bunch, try some recipes even eat simple some days it will just become more natural...as for life thing i was like that too being i am overcoming an eating disorder i was always paranoid about how i will i eat can i do this how long how much now its like ok shut up it doesnt matter do it now and take it one day at a time, who cares how long it last just do it, if it feels right time is not of the essence, a woman i just met at a new raw food restaunt in my city has been raw for like 10yrs! so i went in all stupid like ooo howd you learn, are you getting your nutrients blah blah blah - she was like look i come from hungry i discovered this 10yrs ago by myself! read and do what feels right and everything you thought you knew about nutrition calories blah blah forget it, i dont think cave people or our ancestors gave it much thought why should we...ok sorry this is so long just thought i give ya my 2 cents, best of luck -amanda

[Lay-Lay]

I have been on this route many many times... first of all give yourself a big hug! Second stop listening to that head and listen to your body. Thats what I had to do. I had to stop singing to myself the I can'ts and starting singing the I am beautiful and healthy and happy on raw!

[meinleben]

purtyflowrr

today is forever....

just eat raw today.....today is all you have.....

be raw one day at a time...if feels so amazing when i live like that....

[spicyfull]

You are thinking of RAW as a diet, how much weight can you lose, RAW is not a diet, it is a LIFESTYLE Change and weight loss can be a by product of the change.
There are enough people beating us up for having an opinion. So don't be so hard on yourself. Just LOVE yourself and remember how great you felt when you spent time in New York. You are taking steps that will prolong your life, make no sickness in your world and you will be forever CUTE.......Welcome to MY World................

[DavidZaneMason]

Just my opinion:

-I hear you. Things are only difficult when you hold yourself to some one else's standard besides what is right and comfortable for YOU - right now. Any other thought or discipline.....other than stretching from there.......is causing you anxiety and disturbing your harmony and is not worth it.

On the practical side: Set much smaller goals......that you are prepared and willing to do on a daily basis. Set small timetables along with those goals - and keep them. If you cannot keep them (for whatever reason) set smaller goals. Success - with even small small goals....gives you psychic traction....and wires your neural nets for more control and success. It gives you a taste for it.

-Remember that there are no raw food police.....and the raw food diet comes from nature and from your heart.....not out of a package or book.

-What do you think?

-David Mason

[purtyflowrr]

Thank you all so much for your replies. You are so right. I just have to make it about doing this day-to-day. I can't think about years and years. If I just do it from day to day, it will become a habit and it won't be hard down the road. But, I make it hard cause I think about it too much. I had a great sleep last night and I woke up feeling ready for this. Today I will eat raw. Today. Each day, I have to make a decision and today, I chose raw. End of story. I am going to love myself. I know the right way to eat. I know all the processed, cooked, boxed food is awful for my body. When I eat it now, I feel horribly guilty for putting it in my body. It's like my spirit knows the right way to eat, but my head gets in the way. I have to stop that and start doing what I know is right. I'm going to do this, darn it! I am!!!!

[Angelic]

Purtyflowrr, I know exactly what you mean..I do the same thing, I will do raw for a few days and then I slip up and have chips. I believe with me it has something to do with me being scared of being the best I can be. I feel like I sabatoge myself, I do the same thing with my nails, I will grow them out halfway, then I bite them all off, the main thing is to get past the craving, take it one day at a time, and maybe write a list of why you shouldn't eat that cooked food. I made me a list and it does help me think about it now when I crave chips or cooked food..I am still working on this issue myself. It just takes reconditioning your mind and take it one day at a time. If I slip up, I just don't beat myself up about it, I jump right back on raw and keep going. I am getting better and better about not cheating when I do this. Hope that helps. :)

[rawpriestess]

Just know that you can do this.

I have been struggling raw for about 5 years now.

But it wasn't ME who made the final decision, well, let me re-phrase that, I didn't KNOW it was ME who made my decision to go raw. LOL

let me explain:

my son came up to work on my home to add a bathroom, some carpeting etc, and he wanted to go RAW, so I said I would do RAW with him, just to keep him on track. LOL

Well, what happened was, I made a bunch of stuff, that I normally would not have made for just myself (what was I thinking?) and I loved it, it was great!!!

I made sure that HE had food all day long, fresh fruits, and all kinds of tasty goodies, major dinner presentations, and lots of different RAW recipes everyday, (kind of sounds like what Alissa suggests we do when starting RAW in her book HUH?--maybe she KNEW something? YES!)

Well, in the process, I re-connected to eating RAW, and haven't stopped.

It was a journey not a destination, I didn't have a specific goal in mind, I didn't have a plan, I didn't have any specific thing I wanted to lose weight for, or anything.

I just ate raw food!!, every day!! that was it.

And each day, became another day that I ate raw food.

But I think one of the things that really helped me stay raw for over 4 months now is this:

I told myself that if I really wanted cooked food, then I could have it tomorrow!--Well, we all know that "tomorrow" never comes.

[chilove]

Changing the way we eat is on the one hand, seemingly very simple (just eat raw food) but on the other hand very complicated. So much of our lives revolves around food, food and comfort, food and celebrating, food and socializing. It takes a while to develop new patterns and habits that will enable us to deal effectively with food in all those different contexts. We need to be able to put food back into a proper perspective and to start living life on it's own terms, without using food as a crutch. It just takes a little bit of work at first. It becomes easier, new routines fall in to place. Give yourself a lot of credit for attempting such a large lifestyle change! :-) Work on one aspect at a time and go from there. Many, many people have permanently changed the way they eat and their relationship to food. Even people who were previously junk food addicts and compulsive eaters (like me). :-)
It can be done and you can do it too!!

All the best,

Audrey
www.rawhealing.com

[IamLoved]

I hear you too,

I have struggled with this, I still do. I will do so well and then I blow it. A lot of it stems from emotional issues. I don't like being the only "weird" one who eats differently. We hardly ever go out to eat (once a year IF THAT) so when we go out I don't want a salad. Someone has a birthday. It can be hard. So much of our lives and memories and traditions revolve around food, and family. Like I said, I still struggle with this. What I have found though is the food usually does not taste as good as I think it should. Many things I am able to turn down (like cookies or bread) because I know that I can make them better and if I'm going to eat it I want it to be the best it can be if that makes any sense at all.

Well, I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone. Keep going one day at a time.

One other thing that I struggle with is guilt. You see our 20 month old daughter is all raw, so if I am not, and no one else in the family is, why is she? You see? I mean I know why she is, but as she gets older how can I explain to her that she eats healthy and everyone else does not. So I really need to try to stay raw, if for no other reason for her. I don't want her eating the other stuff and we are slowing transitioning the other children (who are at least vegetarian now which was a huge thing for my husband to agree to this!!!).

So, I feel your pain. Sometimes I think we make it way too complicated. We just need to eat raw, and stop thinking about it so much!

[purtyflowrr]

Changing the way we eat is on the hand, seemingly very simple (just eat raw food) but on the other hand very complicated. So much of our lives revolves around food, food and comfort, food and celebrating, food and socializing. It takes a while to develop new patterns and habits that will enable to deal effectively with food in all those different contexts. We need to be able to put food back into a proper perspective and to start living life on it's own terms, without using food as a crutch. It just takes a little bit of work at first. It becomes easier, new routines fall in to place. Give yourself a lot of credit for attempting such a large lifestyle change! :-) Work on one aspect at a time and go from there. Many, many people have permanently changed the way they eat and their relationship to food. Even people who were previously junk food addicts and compulsive eaters (like me). :-)
It can be done and you can do it too!!

All the best,

Audrey
www.rawhealing.com

Audrey,

What an inspiration you are!!!!! I went to your website, and you are such a motivation. If you don't mind, I am going to email the address that is on your site and ask you a couple of questions. :)

[Conscious Midwife]

I just returned from a 3 week vacation in NYC. It was purely heaven!!!! I was eating raw gourmet food everyday, shopping at all the fresh food markets and doing awesome. While I was there, I lost a little over 10 pounds and I looked soooooo radiant. Not one person I came into contact that I know didn't not make a comment. That was such a horrible sentence...anyway, everyone noticed. I have been home for a week and have just been eating horribly. In my head, it is a constant battle. I tell myself....raw isn't something I can do forever, I need to find a plan that I can do forever. But, then I think to when I did weight watchers and I never felt on weight watchers how I do on raw. But it is so emotionally hard for me. Sigh. I want to do this so badly, but I sabatoge myself. What can I do to do this for good?


GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD

and INTO THE HEART OF THE MATTER

LOVE YOURSELF TO HEALTH AND TOTAL WELL BEING ONE BITE AT A TIME!

your temple deserves it

[MangoMommy]

The best thing for me to stay raw is to be prepared. Do you have Alissa's book? I have a list of all the raw recipes that I want to try and I feel like I'll never get to all of them because there are so many!! Take a look at all the delicious recipes and pictures on this board. If you keep in your mind what you're gonna have for your next delicious raw meal complete with appetizer and dessert..yummmm...you can hardly get sidetracked with something that you may regret later.

[purtyflowrr]

So after a long day of thinking and contemplating my raw expedition, I decided to come up with a list of all the things that scare me about going raw. This was an interesting exercise. Here are a couple of the things I listed:

I am afraid this won't work for me like it seems to for everyone else. This fear is not even based on anything factual, as I have experienced the good feelings and calm aura provided by raw.

I am afraid that I do not have complete control over what I eat. This is based on the eating disorder tendencies that I have dealt with for years. If I am not on some sort of plan where I am told exactly what and how much to eat, I tend to think it is not going to work. While on weight watchers, I had a specific number of points given to me every week. It was so simple. Of course, I made crappy choices with little nutritional value, but I still lost weight. The points made me feel in control. With raw, I really can't do points cause it doesn't work like that. There is not so much restriction with calories and fat as on a SAD diet. So maybe it is more of a control thing.

On the other hand, I made a list of reasons I want to do raw....which, by the way faaaaaaaaaaaaaaar outdid the reasons I am frightened to do it. In conclusion, the good outweighs the bad, and I think I just have to take this "leap of faith" and put myself out there and do it.

[honeybee joy]

The only thing that is stopping me from being successful with this is myself

I think it just takes time to work thru all the emotional blockages. This is a big change from how most of us were raised! It takes time. Be patient with yourself and have fun!


I am afraid this won't work for me like it seems to for everyone else. This fear is not even based on anything factual, as I have experienced the good feelings and calm aura provided by raw.

I have had those fears myself before. You just have to overlap that fear and replace it with the fact that it will work for you.

[Sharon in Colorado]

I had a conversation with a very wise man, my DH the other day. I told him that I get a bit out of control with chocolate and it drives me crazy, so I have a very black & white view of "moderation". I just don't think I should even moderately have a piece of chocolate because then I'll be out of control.

Now, mind you, this is always just a plain milk chocolate bar, but it has to be an imported one because they have a nicer taste and texture and made with real vanilla instead of vanillin which is artificial. Or it has to be one of those fancy high quality milk chocolate bars from the health food store. I tell you I'm like some kind of Starbuck's coffee addict with the chocolate.

So you know what my husband says to me? He says that the reason I probably go overboard on the chocolate is because somewhere in my mind I tell myself I can't have it, or this will be my last time I can have it, and I end up overeating it to the point that I don't even like it, I'm just eating it, you see.

So he suggested that I just tell myself that I can eat it if I want to, and that does work for me. Either I don't want it at all or I want just a little bit of it, instead of gorging on it.

Soon will come the day though, that I get that junk out of my life for good. I actually think I get a reaction to it because the times I've been off it for long enough and then have some, I feel nervous and jittery so I know the stuff does not belong in my system.

[chilove]

Hi Purtyflowrr,

You are welcome to email me anytime.

It's great that you identified those fears! :-) Doing affirmations is a great way to change your mindset. My favorite was "I love raw food" and I said it over and over and over again. Write down some that are meaningful to you and start doing them. They really do help.

All the best,

Audrey
www.rawhealing.com