Howto order at a Wedding

[m_pizzano]

Hi everyone! I hope this question wasn't already asked but if it was, just point me in the direction of the right thread.
Anyway, I'm going to a wedding next weekend and would like to have a raw meal. I know what to do at a restaurant but can I do the same thing at a wedding? ~ For example, Ask the server to bring me a raw salad and list certain veggies. Or should I call ahead of time? Has anyone had experience with this?
Thanks so much!
Marisa

[Cecilia]

I'm not entirely sure, but I think you might want to talk to the bride and groom or whoever is organizing the event, then they will talk to their caterer. I think that's how it works. It's what I would do at least

[Sharon in Colorado]

Weddings are a challenge, in that there are usually hundreds of people who have to be served the same thing and special orders aren't very common.

What you could do is when the server brings your salad, ask for another one instead of your regular meal. Now if it is buffet style you are in luck because that is obviously the easiest for you.

I think making requests, etc. is going to make things too complicated in the already complicated life of the bride and groom to-be. Better not to make yourself a concern, even if they are happy to oblige, it just makes things more of a challenge.

Also eat ahead, and bring along a snack like some bananas or an avo for your salad to keep you satisfied.

[wyjoz]

At my last wedding in Chicago. --we flew there from Oregon: I ate before the wedding: at the reception I had 3 salads, I brought a little beggie of sliced veggies and just flipped them into my salad. No problem! then in our hotel I had Green Smoothie that I kept in the 'ice bucket' on ice. we changed the ice 3 times a day--but that was my decision and I survived!

the bride was razzled about 2 people ordering vegetarian meals and she e-mailed me: was it "YOU' that ordered the vegetarian meals? I just said no! that was the end of it!

Enjoy the 'wedding' don't make issue of the food.

[m_pizzano]

Thanks eveyone for your advice! I think I'm going to just eat before I go and then bring some extra food to put on the salad. You're right, I don't want to make anything more complicated for the bride (especially since I will be one in October so I know how stressful it can be!)

[rachelmh]

I will be a bride in May. I was just looking at some of the catering menus. Now I want to plan a raw wedding!!!!

[eachpeachpearplum]

I would have no problem asking the couple who their caterer is and then calling and asking what will be served explaining that you have many food restrictions (sometimes this is easier than getting into the who raw thing) and if it sounds as if there will not be the approprate food ask them if they would mind preparing a special - whatever you want - for you. Remember that the couple are spending $$ on a SAD plate for you imaging what the chef can do with that money with all raw foods!

Hey they may say no but you can always ask. I was in catering and would not have has a problem doing this for you. Just dont burden the couple as they have enough on their plate - lol!

[Tirza]

rachelmh:
First of all, congratulations on your upcoming marriage.
You could do a "raw gourmet buffet" of the decade if you wanted to order lots of really great raw things. Make sure that the most discerning SAD eater will like it though. Then have a couple of SAD entrees and side dishes. Then people can just go ahead and choose for themselves. No one will notice the difference, except to wonder what those fabulous, interesting "new" dishes were.
We don't HAVE to make a great big deal of RAW per se, just go ahead and serve great dishes and graciously accept the compliments, whether it be at home or at a special function. I think we should always be sensitive to the preferences and restrictions that others may have.
If we don't want to or cannot make it ourselves, we can get a few things from a deli or somewhere to accomodate them.
This is what we want for ourselves, no? That people should be considerate and try to accomodate our diet.


eachpeachpearplum:
I love presenting this as a "food restriction". It sounds almost medical and mysterious. Who would argue with a "food restriction"? After all, a doctor might have told you to do it and who would argue with a doctor? I always maintain that we don't need to be nervous or apologetic about this. It may be a food restriction to others, but we look at it as an opportunity.
Later, when we have regained our health, lost weight, or never get sick, our dear SAD friends are bound to notice and ask us our secrets. THEN we can give it to them. When they are ready to hear it. When we are an example worth copying. Not when we are in "preach" mode, trying to hit everyone over the head with it, or being the person whose only topic of conversation is raw food.
I love Raw Priestess's signature line: something like - I don't HAVE to eat raw, I GET to eat raw.
That's super for "us" but for "them", we can get a lot of mileage out of the restriciton or prescription idea. People will bend over backward to accomodate a medical prescription, so play it. Better than the rolled eyes and smirks when they think we are just on a silly self-imposed fad.

[Lay-Lay]

Usually a salad is provided and I eat that and I also make Alissa's Angel Hair w/marinara. It is easy to ask for a empty plate and just put this on it and I also make some candy balls for dessert.

[Sharon in Colorado]

I also think it's a great idea to make sure there are a few SAD things for those who can't deal with raw, as well as some fresh fruits and salads for those people who can't deal with SAD.

It is nice to have a thoughtful bride, but sometimes we run across those brides who don't give a hoot about anyone else's needs but their own on 'their' day.

[Larue]

Something to consider is that meals may be planned and *paid* for by the number of confirmations there are. Therefore, if you don't eat, that's one wasted meal. (This can be expensive) It's best to talk to the bride and/or groom (whomever is paying) and let them know in advance so that they can cover this the way that's best for them. In advance, it really shouldn't be an issue. If it's a sit down meal, they could plan a large salad for you, for example. There are enough surprises and headaches that come up naturally at events like this for them to deal with...you don't want to be one of them!

[codajess]

I'm in the minority on this. I understand that the bride & groom are paying for the food, however, I think it's rude to ask someone to modify food that you aren't paying for. I think if you don't like what you're served, you can give it to someone else. Eat beforehand, so you aren't hungry. You may luck out & get a salad, or fruit there. I would never ask someone who was doing something for me (free food) to change it. Again, ONLY my opinion. Do what you're comfortable with.

[m_pizzano]

Thanks again everyone. hhmmm... many valid points to think about. I don't want to bother the bride but I guess I can always call ahead and see if they can prepare a veggie plate / salad and just see what they tell me. I know that I had my engagement Party at the Chart House in NJ and the manager there said that they can prepare a meal for any type of diet, so hopefully this place will be able to also. If not, I will just go back to my original plan and eat before hand.

rachelmh: Congratulations on your wedding. When I was first looking for places, I wanted to have a raw/organic vegan meal also but since my father is paying, that wasn't an option :-( But I do know some people who had a raw wedding with some organic cooked meals for people who were turned off from raw. Good luck with whatever you decide! oh.. I am going to have a raw cake though!

[sport]

I was at a wedding yesterday. I took my own food and asked for an empty plate.