Doctors -- can you believe this????

[BDraw]

I just took my adopted daughter (4 1/2) to a behavorial specialist. She's very delayed due to her first 2 1/2 years of life. And she is underweight, according to their scales, which is a great concern to "them". Anyway, this doctor suggested that to help with her weight issue I put Wesson oil on all her food.


Can you believe that? I was so appalled that I was speechless and more than anything just wanted out of her office. No, I did not let her know that I'm attempting mostly raw for this little one. You know sometimes you just know when to keep your mouth shut, cause others are merely clueless!

I also didn't let her know that I am seriously considering homeschooling her, cause in her (docs) opinion, she really needs the pre-school to help her advance.

Sometimes I wonder if I am doing the right thing. But when this lady suggested Wesson Oil, I couldn't believe my ears! And I know I'm doing right! But I would like some suggestions as to how to help her gain weight. She has actually lost weight since she's been with me -- that does not look good. Thank God her brain is growing and that is not a concern. And I do know I am giving her good food, though I am beginning to wonder if I am giving her enough.

It is quite a tight-rope to walk -- her older sister has an overweight problem. So I must be careful to be fair to all concerned when dishing out food.

Thanks for listening - I really needed to vent!! And all help appreciated! Thanks!

[eatyourbroccoli]

the majority of allopathic medicine and opinions make me sick

youre doing the right thing. listen to your intuition.

is your daughter happy and healthy?

then youre fine.

[nicollette]

Dear BDraw, I'm so sorry to hear about your doctor. My bro-in-law is a doctor (as well as the rest of my dh's family being involved in the med field as far as nursing and lab techs). His family looks at us sideways because we are trying to give up meat (his family is big on hunting) and thinks we are backwards for praciticing herbal medicine. We have decided not to tell them that we are considering a raw diet. I don't want to know what they will say. Good luck with your daughter!

[Dawn39]

By adopting this child and giving her your time,love, good food and help how can she not prevail?
Follow your heart you're doing fine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish you the best & I will pray for your family!!!
Love
Dawn

[dreamrawalwz]

the majority of allopathic medicine and opinions make me sick

youre doing the right thing. listen to your intuition.

is your daughter happy and healthy?

then youre fine.

Added to that...is she satisfied hunger wise? Are you letting her choose her foods, sometimes the little ones will know what their bodies need and when.

What is Wesson oil?

I'm surprised he didn't suggest to take her to get fast food, soda, junk, and icecream! That's what my sister is doing with my nephew since he's too thin.

[BDraw]

Thanks for the quick replys, I really needed some encouragement today. I'm really getting tired of mone more person telling me she is mentally delayed and too thin. Really gives me reason to doubt myself.

[adrienne]

it is truely amazing how conventional medicine almost wants to shame us into submission! i am sorry you were submitted to that and realized that if someone is suggesting wesson oil to add to anyone's diet that they are not worth listening to!
although i do not know your entire story, it seems to me natural for your adopted daughter to have some delays based on what you lightly touched on as her 'history'. good for you for wanting to homeschool and go raw! i really support you and your daughters journey.
if you have access to an asian market, try coconut water and meat...the water has great electrolytes and the meat is high in good fats. i just hack mine open (very ungracefully i might add) with a knife and mallet. when you buy them make sure they have no purple spots or large splits in them. add the meat to smoothies or just cut it up and eat it...my 2 year old loves it.
avocados are great...try some 'pudding' recipes made with carob (i'm sure you can find some here) if she is not up for the green-ness or mushiness of the avocado
also, nuts too are great
and finally, don't worry she'll be fine! and certainly way better than she would be if you fed her wesson oil!!!!!!!!!!!!
blessings to you and your family
adrienne in boston :)

[Conscious Midwife]

I'd write a letter to whatever board of physicians your doc belongs to.
I'd also go to the states website to be sure hat there license was intact and if there are any suits pending
I'd also change MD's immediately plus file a complaint with thee insurance company that is making the payment.

THAT IS THE MOST ABSURD ADVICE I'VE HEARD FROM A PEDS DOC IN A WHILE!!!! :mad: :eek: :confused:

[Green Life]

You happened upon a quack.

Try another Dr. as that doesn't sound right, and there are many many more Drs. out there that are wonderful.

Drs. have saved my life, and are currently saving my Daddy's life.

I truly hope you find another Dr.

One you can thank God for, as I have.


Green life

[iceblueyes]

I am mostly a lurker here but had to write to you. I adopted a little boy at 6 months who's pediatrition told me not to as he would be a vegetable and never walk if he lived.

I went totally organic with him even making his formula from organic soy beans and a huge list of other things. I also had to teach him to suck from a bottle.

He was failure to thrive,hypotonic (low or no muscle tone) autistic, little to no brain function, had two machines to help him breathe, has prater willi syndrome, ocd's, and reactive attachment disorder. That is the short list. He is now 10, not only did he live, but he is now in a regular fourth grade class and walks, again thats a short list of his accomplishments. He has no retardation as he should have had. He still has problems but I am here to tell you doctors know nothing when it comes to nutrition and these special children.

In the interest of not boring everyone to tears with the details, if you would like to email me privately, I would be happy to talk with you. My email is iceblueyes3@yahoo.com . If it is inappropriate to give my email I am sorry I am not sure how this works.

[SedonaSun]

What is Wesson oil?


It's bottled vegetable(?) oil used for frying chicken and other junk.

And...it's a totally disgusting suggestion from the "doc"!

[NoGMO!]

imo, it's phenomenal that things like Wesson Oil or Criso could even still be allowed on the market - for anyone with a robust constitution - but for a doctor to suggest it? jeeze- did they own stock in Wesson Oil? :p

sorry to hear of this.

[MangoMommy]

I wish I had known what I know now when my son was born. He was born 3 months early and stayed in the hospital at Dartmouth Hitchcock for three months. He was first fed breast milk through a tube but when he was able to drink from a bottle he was fed and continued to be fed when he went home a concoction of breastmilk, corn oil and corn syrup!! I still feel so bad for listening to the doctors on this one!! Feeding my premature infant corn oil & corn syrup!!! What was I thinking???

[BDraw]

Thank ever one of you for responding -- it is so reassuring!

One of the questions stands out in my mind that was ask -- something about her eating until she is full. . . major problem. These three siblings have experienced starving and have no clue what "full" is. Honest! They could eat as much as my husband and still want more if there is more available. So I have to use my best judgement ( I have raised 4 others) as to what is enough for these little people and not give them more than that. It is a tough call. And I do wonder if I am doing the right thing. But you know, they are really healthy. No colds or any such child hood stuff one typically brings home from school. So I must be doing something right!

Thanks again for all the concern and love!

[Sharon in Colorado]

I remember the old Wesson Oil commercials with Mrs. Carol Brady, LOL.

Okay I think I have an idea of when and where this doctor must have been brought up, no offense to any rednecks out there. I probably would have laughed right there in the doctor's office - how ludicrous. Ya, let us just pour some Wesson Oil on her oatmeal and into her smoothies. While you are ate it, just stick a straw in the bottle for her. Yeesh.

Does your daughter like avocado? That is a great fat, but I don't think you really need to give her fat to make her gain. Plenty of fruit, smoothies and mild veggies and greens and as much as she wants will help her build muscle, especially if she is active. Put lots of cut up fruit out, especially bananas which are very filling. I'd be very careful with nuts though, unless they are ground up, Shazzie's daughter got a pine nut stuck in her lung, so I think whole nuts are not a good idea for anyone under the age of 6.

Really, I think you should find another doctor though!

[RowanC]

when he went home a concoction of breastmilk, corn oil and corn syrup!! I still feel so bad for listening to the doctors on this one!! Feeding my premature infant corn oil & corn syrup!!! What was I thinking???

MangoMommy, don't feel guilty. People of my age used to ALWAYS trust their doctors... we let them tell us to feed our babies formula instead of breastfeeding, we let them circumcise our sons without even KNOWING we had a choice, and we even let them choose our child's sex in cases of ambigous sexed children. The guilt could be overwhelming if we let it.

Just know that now you are informed, knowledgeable, and capable of making better choices. That's called progression...

You're fine...

Don't do guilt. ;)

[mindelicious]

I am mostly a lurker here but had to write to you. I adopted a little boy at 6 months who's pediatrition told me not to as he would be a vegetable and never walk if he lived.

I went totally organic with him even making his formula from organic soy beans and a huge list of other things. I also had to teach him to suck from a bottle.

He was failure to thrive,hypotonic (low or no muscle tone) autistic, little to no brain function, had two machines to help him breathe, has prater willi syndrome, ocd's, and reactive attachment disorder. That is the short list. He is now 10, not only did he live, but he is now in a regular fourth grade class and walks, again thats a short list of his accomplishments. He has no retardation as he should have had. He still has problems but I am here to tell you doctors know nothing when it comes to nutrition and these special children.

In the interest of not boring everyone to tears with the details, if you would like to email me privately, I would be happy to talk with you. My email is iceblueyes3@yahoo.com . If it is inappropriate to give my email I am sorry I am not sure how this works.

GOOD FOR YOU!!! My brother was born with prader willi syndrome & my mom went through all of that too! We grew up on a high raw diet but then went to sad in our teenage years (my brother is a year younger than me). He is not retarded like many of the children with this disease but he always did have a weight problem. Three years ago at 18 he weighed 350lbs at 5 feet tall. He was put in a group home where the is 80-85% raw and he is now down to 140 lbs, the majority of the weight which is left just hangs off of his body in excess skin...but hopefully uping the raw will bring it all back where it needs to be.
They do still have him on all kinds of medication, to regulate his moods and his sleeping patterns...I want to get him taken off of this meds but in his living situation they will not.
Is your child on meds? I know a lot of the behavior probs associated with this disease begin to develop later in life but have the doctors insisted on anything yet?

[iceblueyes]

GOOD FOR YOU!!! My brother was born with prader willi syndrome & my mom went through all of that too! We grew up on a high raw diet but then went to sad in our teenage years (my brother is a year younger than me). He is not retarded like many of the children with this disease but he always did have a weight problem. Three years ago at 18 he weighed 350lbs at 5 feet tall. He was put in a group home where the is 80-85% raw and he is now down to 140 lbs, the majority of the weight which is left just hangs off of his body in excess skin...but hopefully uping the raw will bring it all back where it needs to be.
They do still have him on all kinds of medication, to regulate his moods and his sleeping patterns...I want to get him taken off of this meds but in his living situation they will not.
Is your child on meds? I know a lot of the behavior probs associated with this disease begin to develop later in life but have the doctors insisted on anything yet?

My son is not on medications, we do have him on a very strict caloric intake, mostly raw. He does take herbs and supplements for problems that may occur. We do notice that as he gets older his OCD'S come in waves. Get worse and then better. He is very sensitive to any changes in his world. Just his older sister graduating from HS, he started to pull out his teeth and body hair. For that we mostly work on behavior modification and keep him structured. Our home is alarmed so we know if he is attempting to steal food. We learned that from a behavior specialist. He learns where the alarms are (kitchen and bathroom) and avoids the areas and learns to ask to gain acces. IT is very stressful and naturally we can't leave him with a babysitter. I am also a single mom, his father gives no support because he said he doesn't have to because he is adopted. I have a wonderful man in my life who is an excellent father figure and that is good for Josh. This little boy is so remarkeable I would not change my life at all, he has taught me so much! I am grateful to be his mom.

Where is the group home that is mostly raw? That is my only dilemma ~ what to do when he becomes an adult?
Thank you, Kim

[vgloveforlife]

Mangomommy-I'm from New Hampshire too!

Bdraw-definitly get another doctor ASAP! I can not believe they recommended wessen oil although I think what they were trying to say is add more fat/calories.
I wouldn't worry too much, if you are feeding your child a healthy diet with enough calories. Some children are just naturally very skinny.

[Sharon in Colorado]

Also getting a young child to eat can be like pulling teeth.

How many of us have had 2 year olds who get by with drinking milk or juice and nothing else all day. They are like little fasting maniacs. And how many mothers of those 2 year old have called the doctor, worried that something is "wrong" with their baby who refuses to eat?

I believe until a child is 5-7 they just don't eat much at times. Then you can't stop the little buggers from eating you out of house and home, especially in those early teen years.

So my opinion is quality over quantity. And when they are hungry they'll eat.

[Lay-Lay]

I admire you for adopting. My husband and I agreed that we would adopt if we haven't had any children by the time my husband is 30, which is coming up before you know it.

[mindelicious]

My son is not on medications, we do have him on a very strict caloric intake, mostly raw. He does take herbs and supplements for problems that may occur. We do notice that as he gets older his OCD'S come in waves. Get worse and then better. He is very sensitive to any changes in his world. Just his older sister graduating from HS, he started to pull out his teeth and body hair. For that we mostly work on behavior modification and keep him structured. Our home is alarmed so we know if he is attempting to steal food. We learned that from a behavior specialist. He learns where the alarms are (kitchen and bathroom) and avoids the areas and learns to ask to gain acces. IT is very stressful and naturally we can't leave him with a babysitter. I am also a single mom, his father gives no support because he said he doesn't have to because he is adopted. I have a wonderful man in my life who is an excellent father figure and that is good for Josh. This little boy is so remarkeable I would not change my life at all, he has taught me so much! I am grateful to be his mom.

Where is the group home that is mostly raw? That is my only dilemma ~ what to do when he becomes an adult?
Thank you, Kim

He lives in Willow Street, PA. It is a really great program. There is about 5 individuals that live in the same house, they have jobs (he makes as much as I do!!), the have chores, nightly exercise, and they take turns preparing dinner. They have monthly dances where he met his girlfriend. They really encourage them to get married, the government will provide an individual that monitors expenses, food, & maritial issues. He is allowed to come home for special occasions and weekends, and during the week as long as it does not cause a lot of change in their schedule (they hate that). He has come a long way. High school was the worst, I wish my mom would have homeschooled him.
There is a yahoo group for siblings of PWS kids....if you have other children. I talk on there a lot to the younger kids growing up with it.

[Ariella]

what are you typically feeding her on any given day? my son is 4 and high to all raw depending on the day. he loves almond mylk (i add bananas & young coconut water and meat to his though for more calories), you could also try virgin coconut oil, hemp protein powder, adding avocados to stuff she likes, having trail mix readily available for if she gets hungry.... just some thoughts. also just having a BIG basket of fruit on your table so if either of your kids get hungry they can eat on that!

HTH

Ariella

JUICE PLUS+
www.juiceplus.com/+dj73561

my blog: www.ethicalcentral.com/main

[berrymarymac]

I can actually believe all of this, since many "behavioral specialist" are nuts!! lol. My sister was adopted from St. Petersburg, Russian when she was 11 and I was 10, and she was very very skinny and her mentality is lacking in some areas. She has fetal alcohol, depression...and the list goes on. We've been to so many of these "specialists" that it's sickening. And a behavioral specialist has no business in tell you what to feed your child, especially something as harmful as vegetable oil! They think they know everything, but know very little. One tried to "hook" my sister up with a guy at a hospital she was at...and he stayed in the Sexual Offenders houses!!

Also, be careful about homeschooling a special needs child. We found out the hard way that it is illegal here to do so. And the county sent a teacher and suggested it!!

I'm sooo happy you adopted though! It's great that you gave a child a great home! Where is she adopted from?

[greeninlosangeles]

How much underweight she is? Don't forget the charts were made from SAD kids weights and it is possible that neither of the kids might have been average weight-average is just mathematical figure and nothing else!
If child is very underweight, I am sure you can see it without scales or charts.
As for doctors - they are not gods, and they do not know that much more than you, in nutrition. Possibly even less. Doctors are useful in accidents and sudden ilness, but worthless in health and chronic diseases.
I do not know why american doctors think they can give parenting advice. They do not even spend that much time with their own kids.

[honeybee joy]

I just hate the plain garbage that they reccomend to fatten kids up. CORN OIL? Yuck. I just don't get how they think that is a adequate reccomendation. You think they would at least reccomend olive oil. It cracks me up how so many people think coconut oil is BAD, but that Wesson is good. Where is the logic here?

[gina]

DITTO, what greeninlosangeles wrote