Emotional Eaters Everywhere!!!!

[ShelShel]

Calling on all emotional eaters everywhere...I need some advice on what has worked for you.
Normally my life is peaceful and happy...very little stress...anywho...this was not one of those weekends. I felt very stressed and didn't handle it with my normal ease. My husband pointed out half way through the day that normally...in this position, I would have run to Duncan Donuts for a latte and skors candy bar. Would have felt "ok, I can handle things now."
But I stuck it out raw...but felt like I was really hanging on by a wing and a prayer. Instead of facing life with gusto...I was struggling like a fish out of water. It was horrible.
What do you do to handle stress...when food isn't the answer anymore???? Because I can't go back to SAD...ever!

[ljannise]

I use to feel the same way, but a month ago my mother got into a really bad car crash & I could not belive the way I was handling things. I could NEVER have dealt with everything if it wasnt for Raw. My mind was clear, I was prepared, organized in my thinking, & I didnt shed a single tear. Instead of crying, I was nurturing & seemed to have a sixth sense on where I needed to be & who with at certain time which would have been better than just completely losing it & being an emotional basketcase.

I'm very proud to say that I am an only child & I took care of BOTH of my parents AND my husband that day. My dad had prostate cancer surgery 1 week earlier.

All thanks to raw.

[ljannise]

Alissa I Hope You"re Listening!!!

[cornvalley]

Calling on all emotional eaters everywhere...I need some advice on what has worked for you.
Normally my life is peaceful and happy...very little stress...anywho...this was not one of those weekends. I felt very stressed and didn't handle it with my normal ease. My husband pointed out half way through the day that normally...in this position, I would have run to Duncan Donuts for a latte and skors candy bar. Would have felt "ok, I can handle things now."
But I stuck it out raw...but felt like I was really hanging on by a wing and a prayer. Instead of facing life with gusto...I was struggling like a fish out of water. It was horrible.
What do you do to handle stress...when food isn't the answer anymore???? Because I can't go back to SAD...ever!

Tell yourself in the most self instructive way possible. 'It's time to grow up'.

Learning to parent oneself ...not harshly, but with firm, loving words.

That's the only approach that seems to stay with me.

[D'vorah]

Consider reading The Pathway by Dr. Laurel Mellin.

If you want more info about it, I can post more later on.

Deborah

[jaurequi]

What a great question, ShelShel.

In my opinion, the main problem with emotional eaters (and many struggling raw foodists) is the mindset. People continue to view food as comfort, luxury, and or a social thing. Food is for nourishment. It's not romantic, it's not what we're used to, but it is not meant to be. Continuing to see food exclusively as a joy or something to look forward to is an unhealthy exercise; even moreso for those with food issues. One should look for joy, conversation, play, and emotional fulfillment from within themselves and from family and friends.
We've been so conditioned with processed junk, so culturized to view food as our enjoyment, we've lost perspective.

Loneliness, for example, is a cause of a lot of eating issues; no one to talk to, no one to be "real" with, etc. If one begins to work on these issues, food will no longer be a "comfort" but will be come primarily what it is meant to be: nourishment. Then the "joy" of eating will come.

Food=fuel. It is something one has to do to continue life. If people had this as their first rule of food and the enjoyment factor second, it would be a healthier mindset which would lead to healthier behavior.

Best,

[rawpriestess]

Dear Shelshel, first, let me say how sorry I am, that you are going through a stressful time right now,


and Second, let me say,



CONGRATULATIONS ON STAYING RAW!!!

.

.

.

.


YOU RAWK!!!


This is what you can do do, since you can't gorge on cooked comfort foods, you have some choices, you can eat raw comfort foods, which can help in the beginning, like ice cream, warmed soups, warmed cocoa, etc. these help in the beginning, when we still feel the "need" to comfort ourselves during times of stress,



Which is a NORMAL human reaction to stress.






You can also work through this stuff, sit down and ask yourself "what is the worst case scenerio about this issue?" "what is most likely to happen?" and see the differences, or ask yourself "How would (blank) handle this?" blank being Jesus, Buddha, or your spiritual entity of choice, or anyone who you look up to or trust. I used to ask myself how would my MOM handle this, (she passed away over 20 years ago), now I can make my own choices, but I used to always count on her for my decisions many years ago.




this can sometimes help get you to make a decision to take action, or to release something depending on the stress involved.




You see our body goes into stress mode, because of a thought or expectation, or anticipation or anxiety we have.




Carly Simon used to throw up every time, just before she went on stage, didn't matter how much money she was making or how big the house, she would get sick, because of anxiety.



Then one day, she was back stage talking to another performer, and she was starting to get sick, the other performer asked here what was the matter, and Carly said "Oh, I get these butterflies in my stomach and my heart pounds, and I get light headed, I get so anxious about going out on stage." and the other performer said, "WOW, I get all of those feelings too, I just thought it was excitement."




from that moment on, Carly Simon didn't get sick anymore.


So, see, sometimes it is just a matter of looking at things differently from the past.




So, when someone is frustrating -- get excited about the possibility to educate then.




When something is stressfull -- get excited about the possiblity for an adventure, or a learning for yourself.

[Nancysgoingraw]

I need help in this area too. Yesterday it happened to me. I was having such a good day and weekend eating really well and wanting to eat healthy but then I think I felt the stress of too many things going on and I just really wanted to eat Doritos. When I get that in my head, there's almost no stopping me. I have a whole list of things to do other than eat but its like I don't even want to try. So I got the Doritos and felt so sick after eating them. Also did not want to get out of bed this morning, feeling all tired and lethargic. Yuck ! I will post the list here, maybe there are some things on it that will help you.
Nancy

[ShelShel]

lJannise~ I'm so glad in your time of stress you were such a rock for your fam. They will love you all the more for it.

Cornvalley~Wish this was my particular issue, but it's not. Unfortunately, most of the people in my life look to me for comfort. They tend to share all of their problems...and they end up feeling much better, but I feel worse. I'm an extremely responsible-content person and always have been. People who are just the opposite seem to cling to me in the hopes this will rub off on them. :rolleyes: Unfortunately...it doesn't. Either you are happy existing and see the beauty in things or you don't. I chose to see the glass full...but this weekend we spent all our time with three different couples who all see the glass empty! That stressed me. I wanted to comfort myself with food as I always do...but alas it was not to be...nor will it ever be. Which is why I asked for help. But thank you...if this had been my issue, your words would have really helped. Thank you.

D'vorah~ I will look into this book! Thanks! ;)

Jaurequi~ This is sooooooooooooooooo true! Words of Wisdom! :)

RawPriestess~ Thank you, thank you! You always share such inspirational stuff. Being a christian...my first thought should have been to turn to God in my time of need. Wow. Thank you. That really opened my eyes...I'm going to spend sometime looking up a few verses that I can use to encourage myself when I am feeling week. Thank you! You also suggested a new and positive perspective when dealing with an uncomfortable situation. I won't be able to look at that the same way again. Thanks! (((HUGS))) :)

Nancygoingraw~ We have all been where you are at! As a matter of fact, I was just there 10 days ago! :( It was horrible. I went on a SAD bender that would make a sailor blush with shame. :p But just know that you can endure. You will overcome! We have proof of those that have gone before us and accomplished great things in Raw! Dust yourself off and keep trying! We are all human and try our best...just keep trying and don't give up! ;)

Thank you everyone for your words of wisdom and encouragement! You are all awesome.

[greeninlosangeles]

I have the same problem and my solution is not the best-I overstuff myself with raw foods... Solution what worked for me before was 3 times or more aerobic(cardio) exersize a week. Unfortunately my husband almost never lets me go 3 times, and 1 or 2 just doesn't do it for me(we have a toddler.)

[rawpriestess]

Wow, your husband doesn't 'LET' you do something?

How can that be?

[greeninlosangeles]

I always get that question from people who never had much to do with toddlers-I can not leave my toddler at home alone and I can not to take him with me. We walk together a lot, but it doesn't give me cardio, because toddlers love to explore everything on the way!

I had a toddler about a gazillion years ago, I had him when I was 15, I walked every day with him in his stroller that took me 6 months of taking in laundry to pay for, it was $17.00 LOL (wow, have times changed)

I used to do exercises with him in the house, I also ran around our house outside several times a day, fences on both sides, and he would chase me, and I would chase him and we would run together, if you carry him, it will be even more of a workout.

Also, I used to walk to the store (over a mile each away) every day for exercise, and often carry him, then let him walk until he was tired then let him ride in the stroller for a while, two big hills to contend with.

I was so very fit back then, could run after him all day, run and jump and play, and walk forever, of course, I was only 15 LOL, but that is life, and we all have to do what works for us.

Now he is almost 40 and he has 6 little ones of his own, payback if so much fun. LOL

they are all girls, and gorgeous, and he is the over protective Dad, I was the permissive mom, so he gets to reap his own issues.

I am also the crazy eccentric permissive grandma who let's them do anything, and they come to when Dad is too strict, I LOVE THAT, because he used to do that with me and MY mom. LOL

I love life, it comes back to us so perfectly.

[mypinkbow]

Does your local gym where you go to aerobics class at have a daycare? Or depending on the age of your child how about getting a baby jogger. They are awesome and you can jog with your kid in the stroller...........they are great with bicycle tires easy to go every where with on and off road.....or sidewalk. I used to walk 5 miles every day with my kiddo in the jogger and he loved it.

[mypinkbow]

Obviously you can not leave the toddler alone.........thats a no brainer. but can you husband watch him/her while you go to a class. After all if you feel better about yourself wouldn't that make you a better mommy.........better than you even are now?

I was a single mom for along time...........and you can find a way to work out if you want to. What about a exercise tape to use at home when your kiddo is napping or while he/she is playing or there are mommy and me tapes too.

[greeninlosangeles]

Believe me I cosidered all of these myself. My husband lets me out to class once or twice a week(he needs to come by 7 o'clock fro that). None of the gyms around have a daycare, and I do not own a car. We walk with stroller all the time, but my toddler is very active and explring, so he rarely sits in the stroller for long. Sometimes he does and then I get wonderful cardio- a lot of hills around us. I do what I can do right now.

[greeninlosangeles]

Oh, forgot to tell about exersize tape- I never get pass warm up stage, before my son starts hanging on my legs. The same is with abslider- he takres it away from me after 2 times.
He naps just half an hour and at night I am beat myself after dealing with a toddler the whole day.

[mypinkbow]

You said your husband only lets you out once or twice a week. What does that mean? It sounds like he has you in a cage and under his control.

I will give you the benefit of the doubt here. Some women are totally okay with their husbands being in control of their lives.

However, if you feel you are being totally controlled and isolated there is help for you out there. Email me privately if you need assistance finding resourses in your area.

But as a therapist, statements like "He only lets me out" send up red flags to me............

hopefully, i am way off..........

[Vandy]

Deal with the emotion...truly let it overcome you, and deal with it, understand it, address it... once you know how to conquer the emotional/mental issue...everything else will follow. I promise. Work on yourself and it will fall into place.

[ShelShel]

Thank you Vandy. :)

[exurb]

ShelShel have you tried substituting exercise when the desire to eat emotionally strikes?

[ShelShel]

Actually, I am very physically active. I walk 3 and 1/2 miles at the least three times a week (if not all 7 when I can!) and I mow our lawn which takes 2 hours...with a push mower once or twice a week depending on rain fall. I have also danced my entire life...so I do stretches while relaxing during tv at night. (Dance during house cleaning! LOL :D ) Exercise has always been my friend. That is why I never understood my weight issues...but now I do. My body couldn't digest all the junk. But exercise does always lighten my mood. ;) Thanks for the suggestion!

[wizz4ve]

I need help in this area too. Yesterday it happened to me. I was having such a good day and weekend eating really well and wanting to eat healthy but then I think I felt the stress of too many things going on and I just really wanted to eat Doritos. When I get that in my head, there's almost no stopping me. I have a whole list of things to do other than eat but its like I don't even want to try. So I got the Doritos and felt so sick after eating them. Also did not want to get out of bed this morning, feeling all tired and lethargic. Yuck ! I will post the list here, maybe there are some things on it that will help you.
Nancy

If you are going to eat SAD foods on a whem because of stress or cravings, I suggest you eat slowly while reading the ingredients on the bag. That helped me so much when I was in the grocery store today. I want a bowl of cereal so bad, cocoa puffs and 2% milk but I know what's in it and know it will have unhealthy effects on my body. Just knowing that has helped me to conclude that I will not be having that bowl of cereal afterall. Keep up the good work and don't beat yourself up so bad about it.

[ShelShel]

Luckily, I never touched the SAD foods! :p I was just really stuggling during that stessful afternoon. That is a good idea...perhaps if we didn't look at the food, but rather at what it took to produce it...we would stay away from SAD a bit easier. LOL Very good!

[greeninlosangeles]

Consider reading The Pathway by Dr. Laurel Mellin.

If you want more info about it, I can post more later on.

Deborah

Deborah,

You got me interested in the book, so I wonder if I should buy the kit-it is not cheap, so I wonder if you tried the program and how did it work for you?

[D'vorah]

I have a whole thing written on my computer at home that describes everything from my perspective, but I'm traveling now, so I'll wing it here.

I think some people can use the book only. It doesn't embrace our dietary views, so, there's that. You can overlook that part and use the tools.

For me, the book wasn't enough. I started using the kits. The way I see it is this, each kit has 11 or 12 weeks of work. More if you go slow like I have. Each kit runs around 100 dollars. So, considering therapy/coaching, etc, that's a bargain if you multiply the typical professional fees times 11-12 or more. But, if you can't afford that money, yeah, you can use the book alone.

I grew up in an abusive, alcoholic home. Feelings weren't allowed, and shaming was how my mom dealt with her kids. I came into adulthood with lots of issues and few skills. What the program has done for me so far is to teach me how to feel all of my feelings, and to find balance in situations that throw me off balance. It isn't 100%, but it's better. More and more I'm able to be present in moments, to be present with my own self, my own heart. When I started the program, many of the concepts offered were so foreign to me. Now, I have access to a bag of tools that gets me through stuff. RIght now, I'm dealing with my daughter/best friend leaving for college, one son about to deploy to Iraq in one of the most dangerous jobs out there, my father's issues, and, yeah, I'm eating too much, and some things I wish I didn't feel compelled to eat, but not everything, not most things, and I'm not crazy with out of control downs or out of control panics or demands. I'm feeling things, yes, but not over the top in how.

The things the kits and book teach you are tools. As you integrate the tools into your life, you develope what they call skills. Pretty simple. The old hurts of life are faced down in a structured way in the kits, old hurts are released. The issues of life, those bad days, struggles, hurts, episodes, etc, they call threshold of need (need for skills). As you gain skills, you can handle more threshold of need stuff. Each kit begins with a self-test so that you can see how high your needs for skills is, and how high your skill level is. I've seen a steady climb in skills, in spite of sky-rocketing threshold of need.

The heart of the program is what is known as cycles. You face a given situation, walk through a structured sort of template for feeling all of your feelings about the whatever it is, then move on to see where expectations aren't comiserate with the situation. Once unrealistic expectations are unearthed, you get to craft new, realistic expectations, craft expectations and find ways to make it all come home.

Yeah.

I still struggle with food some, but I no longer feel out of control, I don't have huge episodes of emotional storms that consume me. I look forward to the day when ALL of my food struggles have come into balance.

OK, now ask me questions, because that's all I can think of.

:-)

Deborah

[dreamrawalwz]

I have a whole thing written on my computer at home that describes everything from my perspective, but I'm traveling now, so I'll wing it here.

I think some people can use the book only. It doesn't embrace our dietary views, so, there's that. You can overlook that part and use the tools.

For me, the book wasn't enough. I started using the kits. The way I see it is this, each kit has 11 or 12 weeks of work. More if you go slow like I have. Each kit runs around 100 dollars. So, considering therapy/coaching, etc, that's a bargain if you multiply the typical professional fees times 11-12 or more. But, if you can't afford that money, yeah, you can use the book alone.

I grew up in an abusive, alcoholic home. Feelings weren't allowed, and shaming was how my mom dealt with her kids. I came into adulthood with lots of issues and few skills. What the program has done for me so far is to teach me how to feel all of my feelings, and to find balance in situations that throw me off balance. It isn't 100%, but it's better. More and more I'm able to be present in moments, to be present with my own self, my own heart. When I started the program, many of the concepts offered were so foreign to me. Now, I have access to a bag of tools that gets me through stuff. RIght now, I'm dealing with my daughter/best friend leaving for college, one son about to deploy to Iraq in one of the most dangerous jobs out there, my father's issues, and, yeah, I'm eating too much, and some things I wish I didn't feel compelled to eat, but not everything, not most things, and I'm not crazy with out of control downs or out of control panics or demands. I'm feeling things, yes, but not over the top in how.

The things the kits and book teach you are tools. As you integrate the tools into your life, you develope what they call skills. Pretty simple. The old hurts of life are faced down in a structured way in the kits, old hurts are released. The issues of life, those bad days, struggles, hurts, episodes, etc, they call threshold of need (need for skills). As you gain skills, you can handle more threshold of need stuff. Each kit begins with a self-test so that you can see how high your needs for skills is, and how high your skill level is. I've seen a steady climb in skills, in spite of sky-rocketing threshold of need.

The heart of the program is what is known as cycles. You face a given situation, walk through a structured sort of template for feeling all of your feelings about the whatever it is, then move on to see where expectations aren't comiserate with the situation. Once unrealistic expectations are unearthed, you get to craft new, realistic expectations, craft expectations and find ways to make it all come home.

Yeah.

I still struggle with food some, but I no longer feel out of control, I don't have huge episodes of emotional storms that consume me. I look forward to the day when ALL of my food struggles have come into balance.

OK, now ask me questions, because that's all I can think of.

:-)

Deborah

We have quite a few things in common in our childhood and I was wondering if I could email you?

[D'vorah]

Yes, please do feel free to contact me to talk.

Please be patient with me if I'm slow to answer, as I'm traveling, dealing with a semi-crisis at my father's house. I'm trying to check emails every day.

:-)

Deborah

[dreamrawalwz]

Yes, please do feel free to contact me to talk.

Please be patient with me if I'm slow to answer, as I'm traveling, dealing with a semi-crisis at my father's house. I'm trying to check emails every day.

:-)

Deborah

Thanks, that's ok wtih the slow response. I tried getting your email through your profile but it says you don't wish to display it...one reason I asked you on here what it was...unless you want to email me first so I have it at: dreamer4life1522@yahoo.com :D

[D'vorah]

Oops, sorry.

You've got mail.

D

[greeninlosangeles]

Deborah, when you buy the kit, is just internet support is included, or also the groups you meet in person? Are the kits more inclusive than the book or they just have more samples?

[D'vorah]

The kits are far more packed with personal application with guided exercises and examples. I really like them. I don’t use all aspects of them exactly the way they are written, but yeah, most of it gets practiced and digested. Again, you won’t follow the food plans offered. Also, I have tailored some of the exercises into prayer format, in keeping with my Christian faith, so, you can use them the way they fit your personal need.

There are no local providers where I live, so any groups we put together, those of us who have found one another, is free. We’ve tried, but not been able to mesh our schedules.

I don’t know what providers in local areas charge.

There are telephone telegroups. I don't know what the current fees are for those. I highly recommend attending any that you can afford, especially at the start, they are priceless in helping model the use of the skills. I was lost before I did groups. At the start I did one that was a one time deal, then joined a group that lasted several weeks. I got to attend one of the retreats, and those of us that did group together there all wanted to do an additional telegroup together. It’s a great way to practice the skills, learn from the ways that others use the skills and get warm fuzzy positive feedback for the work we are doing. Advice giving and corrections aren’t allowed by members, only positive feedback, which is something many of us hadn’t had in life, so it’s helpful to hear and then practice receiving what can be very foreign.

Did that help?

D

[greeninlosangeles]

HOw long are you doing the cycles and did you noticed any changes in your life already?

[D'vorah]

"Cycles" are exercises that only take a short amount of time. Five minutes, maybe longer. I've only had one that took a long time to do, I went to bed with it unfinished and picked it back up in the AM.

Changes, most definitely. I haven't arrived, but I like some changes. I like myself more. I can sit with myself in moments in time and not feel like I have to squirm around. When I started the program, it talked about having a nurturing inner voice, I had no idea, it was a totally foreign concept for me.

I learned to do the feelings part of the cycles pretty quickly, but it took a while to experience it deeply and fully. I was pretty lost at finding my unrealistic expectations and crafting firm, realistic ones. That's coming pretty easily now in day to day situation. I still have to work at it in more extreme situations.

There used to be a big black cloud that was just always there. Always. Not that I never felt happy or laughed or experienced joy, but it was like those good things happened in spite of the cloud, not in the absence of a cloud. Even when I was happy, the cloud was always there. I don't experience that cloud so much now, only rarely do I, and only rarely do emotions feel over the top to me, out of control, which used to be my common.

The program talks in terms of "external solutions." If I have no internal place of balance and sanctuary, I'll turn to some external. For some it's booze, or work, or spending, or food or anything else that we do and do to excess, to keep feelings at bay. For me, food is definitely part of it, but even more debilitating for me was what they call merging, which for me, manifested as either trying to rescue others or seeking to be rescued (mostly the latter), losing myself in other people. I still struggle with it from time to time, but now I can see it and chose to separate.

Yes, there are measurable changes. Each kit has a self-test at the beginning, and I can look at my scores and see movement.

Yeah.

:-)

Deborah

[greeninlosangeles]

How many kits did you do? Not just they are expensive, but the shipping price is outrageous too - 16$(and it cost them at the most 5$ to send it), and there are six kits, and I also have to pay tax since I live in California. I would not mind it, but just one of us works because I want to raise my son.
Do they sell them on ebay or amazon.com or maybe you could sell me your old ones?

[D'vorah]

I don't know if they are available from other sources, I rather doubt so. I just did a quick ebay and Amazon search and saw only their books. One thing that you get with the kits from them is membership to the website. If you bought used kits, you would miss out on support and for me, that support has been critical. These tools and skills, they were so foreign to me, it was like learning an unfamiliar language, I needed some tutoring and coaching from time to time. And one problem with buying old ones is that they update them periodically and make improvements as they gain more experience and knowledge with the tools.

As for selling mine, well, they are set up in a workbook format, so, I've written personal stuff in them, plus it is so helpful for me to review them from time to time, sometimes I see things I didn't get before, or I get a good look at how far I've come.

I'm just starting kit five.

The first two kits really get you grounded in how to use the tools of the work, they are important for creating a strong foundation.

Kit three is a lot of guided work in taking out old trash, really stripping old situations, events, life abuses, etc, of their power.

Kit four takes the work of the previous three kits and gives it wings as you prepare to release the hold on you that your external solutions have over you. For most folks, I think a lot of letting go happens in that kit. I didn't have profound freedom come from specially from it as much as from just the process of all of the kitwork, so I'm going to go back and re-work parts of the kit. I did that before with another of the kits, and it's fine to do that.

I have high expectations of the next two kits in finding release from my external solutions. Really, merging with people has been far more debilitating than addictions to foods has been for me, and that is sooooooooo much improved, so I expect to have a great release from the power food holds on my life now. I have my hand out, reaching for my reward!

I wish I could help you with the issues you're facing. I know it seems like a lot of money, but I spent far more on traditional therapies over the years with far fewer results than I've had in a fraction of the time and money dedicated to these kits.

Blessings,

Deborah

[greeninlosangeles]

Okey, you convinced me. I will buy the first one and hoppefully somthing will change in our situation, so I can buy other ones in time too. Hopefully my husband won't get mad... He knows I rarely buy anything on the impulse, but still he might not approve of this self-help thing, when we are strapped for cash...

[D'vorah]

Well, honestly, I'm not trying to sell it to you, just saying it's helping me, and cheaper than therapy, grin.

If you do get it, and I can be of support, let me know.

Deborah

[greeninlosangeles]

Thanks, Deborah, I just ordered the first kit, so maybe, once I have a phonr orientation, we could be raw solution buddies.

[D'vorah]

Let me know.

Once you have website access, go to the page for finding support, look for me in the Alaska listings.

:-)

D

[goodbeets]

Since I have been raw my food issues have all but dissolved. I believe it was by letting my body eat what (raw) food it needed and wanted as long as it was raw. You can come up with lots of sticky sweet yummy things with raw. Now that I've been raw for a few months I eat less of those things. I also made sure I had a green smoothie 4-8x a week. nOw i consider how cooked food makes me feel rather that how it tastes and (99% of the time) its a no brainer on eating anything SAD -no way!

[D'vorah]

Goodbeets,

I'm so glad it is that simple and easy for you. Sadly, it isn't so easy for some of us, some of us struggle just to get through a single day eating well. I'm grateful it isn't such a struggle for everyone.

Deborah

[misslinda]

I have truly come to the point of not being emotional about eating. I am making sound choices without emotions.........I really never thought I would have reached this as a former sufferer of anorexia/bulimia of 17 years. I have old diaries and weight charts that share the hopeless journey to unhappiness. Boy, this is a great feeling to feel the opposite! :)

My emotional eating took form/healing thru practicing mindfulness meditation along with the power of raw eating. I observed that I was not in the present moment with my problems,issues,thoughts or perceptions/situations. With the guidance of meditation, I was able to stay with the REAL emotions that I could not see or feel b/c typically I would "emotionally eat/not eat" or mask it with another form of void, "exercising" which enabled me to work those issues out for that moment. It took much effort and pain and TIME but every moment to me is a bigger picture of infinity ;)

One question I ask myself and have asked other emotional eaters, is

"What is [truly] going to happen if you don't eat that or get to eat that???" :confused:

I find this question gets me to start opening up the "Pandora's Box" and I'll either listen to deal with it or turn the other way............ ;)

[D'vorah]

misslinda,

Thank you so much for sharing a bit of your story, that is so encouraging.

Yes, mindfulness is such a huge key. That's part of what I'm learning too.

One of the things I do is to wear a little timer on my belt. It looks like a normal pager. When it goes off, at whatever interval I set it to, I "check in" with myself, feel my own sense of self and ask myself "What do I feel?" and "What do I need?" I can set it for a discreet vibrate rather than a more public beep if I want, and I can set it for any amount of time I choose.

It isn't easy, I can easily fall out of the habit, it's not integrated for me yet, and when the problems of life escalate, as they are currently for me (daugher leaving for college, son leaving for Iraq, many problems on the other side of the continent with my aging father), it's just so easy to fall.

I would love to hear more about your journey, how long it took and how you experienced the ups and downs and lumps and bumps of the passage from then to now?

Blessings to you for sharing, and gratitude for this community,

Deborah

[misslinda]

My good friend Deborah!

That is an ingenious idea you have about the timer! I really think that is a loving thing to do for yourself---it's constructive and effective :)


I'll have to gather my thoughts to share my story here is a few days about emotional eating and the changes I experienced with raw.

I still cannot believe I have actually made this far ;)

[Sharon in Colorado]

Green - I have 2 words for you:

PLAY PEN

or used play pen at least! The toddler may not like it at first, you might have to work up to it. Start with him in the play pen for 10 minutes at a time with 3-4 interesting toys and then take him out. Do it 2-3 times a day and work it up until he can be happy in there for up to an hour.

It will take some time but it is doable. Expect some resistance but once he realizes you are in charge he will warm up to the idea.

Then you can get your showers, work-outs, etc. and not worry about what he's into.

If he's in the habit of having the run of the house, this would be great for him. It would help him to enjoy his creative play time instead of trying to get into everything and you on his heels.

[greeninlosangeles]

Thank you, Sharon. Well, my toddler is almost three years old... And he does play by himself a bit 20- 30 minutes at the time. I think that is very reasonable for his age. Unfortunately I have so much to do - wash dishes, do laundry and ohter regular home stuff. Then I need to work out. Then I do some reading every day and from now on I will be for 2 years of everyday work on Solution, which inludes work with journal, calling to solution buddies and maybe evn telephone class. Then I scan old my and my husban's pictures, so we can leave them for our kids and nephews and nieces.And I have a rule - at least two hours per day my toddler must play outside. We live in a condo, so we both go to the different park everyday. I am trying to juggle things and the same time to attend to his needs to explore and learn.
Thanks, Deborah.My orientation is comming Monday!

[D'vorah]

Your child is soooooooooooo blessed to have your loving involvement.

Good luck in your orientation, I'm looking forward to hearing how it was for you. :-)

Deborah

[greeninlosangeles]

Thanks, Deborah. Orientation was good, but a little boring, because they did not do even one cycle.Mostly just repeated the things from the Introduction CDs from the kitand promoted thier classes, although I did got couple questions answered. Oh, I I can not reach the buddy list untill I enroll to the phone class that cost ohter 169 dollars(for 4 sessions), which was not told me before I enrolled. That took me a little aback...
I did find one person to do cycles with, who is on kit one like me, and maybe I can talk my friend into that too. if you would agree too, I would have all three connections a week. But that's up to you! I want to say thank you for telling me about the program. I would recommend it to everyone, but be prepared to spend quite a bit - probably at least 800 for the program.

[D'vorah]

I'd be happy to do connections with you.

Deborah

[greeninlosangeles]

Thanks Deborah, I will email you my phone number!

[greeninlosangeles]

They say, that your settings won't let send you an email. Would you email me first, please?