Gourmet and my sort-of-raw fiance

[rachelmh]

I need some help from any of you with sort-of-raw partners. I am in my second week of 100 percent raw, feel great and lost two pounds. I have been cooking from Alissa's book since transitioning to raw and going raw completely. I have to tell you, I am just not in the mood for heavy food at night. Here's the real dilemma: my fiance supports me in being raw, which is great. But I feel like I need to make a "real" dinner -- albeit raw dinner -- since he is eating it too. I would rather just throw together a simple salad, but he doesn't necessarily agree.

Anyone have experience with this? I think that yesterday and today, with the recipes I made, that I am eating too much fat for my body. I am better at low-fat, but the recipes, for the most part, use nuts as the base.

I really don't want to have to make my raw whatever and a SAD entree for him. He would cook so I wasn't tempted, but then he feels bad eating it in front of me.

Dilemma.

[Nancysgoingraw]

Hi Rachel, my fiance is not really interested in going raw. He loves the food, but has never really been into researching and trying new things. I usually just want a big salad too. For the past few weeks, I have been preparing my own dinner and letting him fend for himself. I'm not totally raw so some nights we will cook and eat the same thing. Let your fiance make his own meals and just prepare your meals at the same time so you can each enjoy your own special meals together. I think its totally fine to have different values as long as you support each other and don't pressure the other to change.

[levamssg]

rachelmh --
You fix what you want for dinner ... let him fix what he wants for dinner ... and everyone is happy. If it bothers him to eat 'SAD' food in front of you, that is his issue, not yours ... so you don't need to take that on.

This is exactly what we do, and it works fine. When I plan to prepare a dish that I know he likes, I'll ask if he may want some. If so, I make a bit extra for him. Interesting ... he kinda likes a LOT of my stuff!!! I'm happy to share, I figure the more good food he eats, the less room there is for the bad stuff. hehehe .... . He keeps telling me I'm getting him "one meal at a time". :)

So, fix your stuff, plan on sharing a bit so he can do "taste testing", and ya never know ... you may be sharing lots of your food in the future ... or maybe you'll both be fixing raw food!

[lily]

I have the same problem. What I usually do is to make a huge raw veg salad, varying it each day, but often including lettuce, watercress, grated carrot mixed with orange juice or vinaigrette, sliced tomatoes, sliced white mushrooms tossed in vinaigrette, etc -- we both have a large serving of this, and my husband has with it some kind of savoury dish -- it might be cheese or hummus or some other simple vegetarian or vegan dish.

I generally get organised so I've got something in the fridge or freezer that's easy for me to heat or serve for him. Luckily he likes simple things and loves salads, but isn't inclined to go fully raw like me.

lily

[rachelmh]

Thanks for the replies. I had a feeling I would get the answers that I did. Starting next week, that is the plan!

[rachelmh]

I wanted to let everyone know how this ended. I told my fiance today that we are spending way too much money on all of the items to make gourmet recipes 4-5 times a week and that I feel like I am eating too many nuts that way. I said I have no problem cooking raw twice a week and then having "dressed up" salads the rest of the time -- including fruits, SOME nuts, lentils, etc. I will make nice salad dressings so the salads don't get boring. He said he is totally thrilled with that compromise! YAY!!!

Just wanted to share. Today is my 11th 100 percent raw day. I feel good, although I seemed to have gained 1/2 a pound. How I envy those people who are at their ideal (for them) weights. But as all of the threads have been saying recently, when my body is ready to lose it will lose. I guess I am just not one of those pounds-melting-off-in-the-beginning type people.

So thank you to everyone who replied. I love the encouragement!!!!