I did it :)

[Lunar*Fey]

I'm not exactly sure where I should post this...

I went to the doctor's yesterday and found that I have gained two pounds in the last week! My doctor was surprised and fairly happy. (little does she know I did it basicly completely RAW). I could feel the weight gain on my body, and it's slightly uncomfortable to be honest...my body feels like weighted down a bit. Anyone know why this might be? Shouldn't my body feel good? I mean I am a lot more energized and my outlook has improved. I am becoming more myself again :). But still, my body doesn't physically feel that great besides an increase in energy. My mom said to the doctor, "Oh, she isn't drinking ANY cow's milk now." and my doctor was like yeah that is part of her extreme restriction which is part of her disorder but she needs to make sure she's getting enough calcium blah blah blah, she also said "the best source is animal products". I wanted to argue, but i knew it wouldn't look good for me so I kept my mouth shut. I told her the ethical reasons I didn't want to drink cow's milk, eggs, etc when she asked, not the nutritional since I knew that wouldn't go over well. As I have said before...they just want me to eat "noramlly" they say. And they wont be happy until I do...which is unfortunate for me. my mom is often very closed minded about my eating preferences/choices, which I suppose is understandable due to my past. But she sees my interest in RAW as an obsession with food. I do not want it to be, nor am I trying to make it, an obsession with food...but a way of life. Something that makes me feel good and is natural and simple. I am trying to learn all i can about it right now so that I do it correctly, which might be why she sees it as some sort of obsession? I can't wait to get a job so it won't matter, I can purchase my own things, even groceries if need be and prove to her that all I want is to be happy and healthy, which is exactly what she wants for me. She just doesn't see that this is the way.

[Tombi]

Lunar*Fey,

Your journey is teaching so much to so many. You are such an inspiration. Stay strong and hold on to your convictions no matter what.

I am so glad you gain the two pounds! Congradulations! Your discomfort maybe your body's way of adjusting to the nutriential changes and the gain at the same time. Keep it up! It will pass in time as your body adjusts.

Way ta go! :cool:

[Lunar*Fey]

thank you Tombi :). I hope to gain a couple more pounds by next week

[misslinda]

Most warmest tight hugs to you Lunar Fey ;)

I'm sure that weighted down feeling is a combination of many changes, engergy,muscle,bloood floow etc getting all accustomed to nourishing your body.

Take it slow and what feels comfortable.......are you discussing with your therapist about the "emotional" and "mental" aspects of achieving a healthier body?

Yes, you are an inspiration and I'm touched. :)

[karenbeel]

Congratulations Lunar Fey on your weight gain that's fantastic!!!! :D , well put Tombi, you are very much a inspiration to all, stick with it your doing fantastically you have grown in so many ways on here it has be wonderful to read your posts and watch you grow. Kepp up the good work. Loving hugs and Blessings. Karen

[Lunar*Fey]

aww thank you Misslinda *hugs back* The weighted down feeling is mostly in my midsection....it's very uncomfortable. But I also have a tremendous amount of energy :). You have been so helpful and inspiring. You have really helped me to get through things and you give the most wonderful advice and such :). Thank you :).

Karen- thank you so much:). *hugs*.

Your kind words have done wonders :). I am so grateful to have you guys (this board)

[misslinda]

Hey sweet thang Luna,

Dont' mention it. You deserve healing and a exciting life. Your stomach is more than likely adusting to so take it easy and mayb even be light on the nuts...........are you soaking your nuts etc? :)

[Lunar*Fey]

Hi MissLinda,
I forgot to soak pumpkin seeds the last time I ate them, and I ate about a whole half cup so that probably affected my stomach. It's really hard for me to figure how much of things (food groups) I should I eat. I don't know what my body needs and it's hard to tell because I'm always trying to make sure I am getting enough calories in. I find that I tend to not get much protein, maybe only about 9% most days. I find myself eating a LOT of fruit, and I mean a lot. Including a good amount of dried to get the calories in. Do you think this is ok? I mean I know nothing is good in excess, but what's excess? lol sorry I know you can't tell me this, I have to learn to listen to my body. But it's so hard to...I don't know what it wants. And I can't differentiate from what my head is telling me and what my body is telling me. I really can't yet. I hope to be able to though. Any way, I am just so confused and afraid to harm my body...again.

[misslinda]

Hi MissLinda,
I forgot to soak pumpkin seeds the last time I ate them, and I ate about a whole half cup so that probably affected my stomach. It's really hard for me to figure how much of things (food groups) I should I eat. I don't know what my body needs and it's hard to tell because I'm always trying to make sure I am getting enough calories in. I find that I tend to not get much protein, maybe only about 9% most days. I find myself eating a LOT of fruit, and I mean a lot. Including a good amount of dried to get the calories in. Do you think this is ok? I mean I know nothing is good in excess, but what's excess? lol sorry I know you can't tell me this, I have to learn to listen to my body. But it's so hard to...I don't know what it wants. And I can't differentiate from what my head is telling me and what my body is telling me. I really can't yet. I hope to be able to though. Any way, I am just so confused and afraid to harm my body...again.

Hey Lunar, there's probably a number of things to consider. I should mention I am not a dietician or expert so I will give personal suggestions here.

Being that ED sufferers particuallry anorexia, suffer from malnutrition as a result digestive concerns and deficiences etc I would take your approach simple and gentle......I know they are stressing calories but I really think your digestive system ought to be addressed. Has you doctors done tests to make sure you don't have any ulcers etc? So again, I would do a gentle approach--one, you don't overwhelm yourself and your body. Two, your digestive health may need time to adjust and hate to see you develop seondary problems. Third, keep RAW fun! :p

Yes, soaking nuts is so important as it removes the enzyme inhibitors ( those guys make it hard to digest ).

How long have you been eating solid foods now?

I would suggest doing variations like blending your foods or making them into smoothies. Green smoothies are an excellent source of protein and chlorophyll and ohter vital nutrients. I would try to keep fruits seperate from nuts. Dried fruit is also something that you may want to soak so they are easier to digest. I wonder if your heaviness is coming from the dried fruits---that seems to cause bloating for many of us.

But by all means, if you can handle some mixture, do so.

Most importantly, chew your food very well--that is the first stage of digestion and making the foods easier to breakdown so they can be assimilated more effectively to give you nutrition.

New Beginnings,
ml :)

[Raw Jewelrylady]

Lunar*Fey, MissLinda has given you a lot of great advise. I do think that green smoothies with bananas & other fruits would be great.

When you get Alissa's book & DVD a lot of your questions will be answered. Plus-have fun with your food..make guacamole..dips..ice creams..Yeah :D

Congrats on the weight gain & yes-you are an inspiration to many.

You seem to be "wise" beyond your years..take care.. :)
Lana

[Nenyath]

Congrats on your weight gain! Hopefully more will follow and your dear mother will realize that you really are doing the best for your body! Keep strong girl! You really are an inspiration!

Fly forever free,
Nenyath

[RawTruth]

It might help you to know that you needn't worry about the protein. As I understand it, we ideally should be getting about 5% of calories as protein. Fruit generally is 5% while veggies are up to 12% or so -- and all of it is usable protein whereas animal protein isn't all usable by our bodies. So, by eating fruit (especially whole juicy fruits) and greens, you're getting enough protein. I don't remember where I learned this, but I just read it in the last few days and am using it in my classes.

Also, I'm pretty certain that you don't need to soak your pumpkin seeds. RP could tell you for sure.

Lastly -- is it possible that the heavy feeling is from your mental body image rather than a physical discomfort? You know what I mean -- since this is an area you've struggled with, maybe it's a leftover kind of disconnect from the old way of thinking about your body.

How wonderful that your choices have now been validated by the scale!

[Lunar*Fey]

Sorry I took so long to reply to this, didn't see it before.

Misslinda- thank you for the advice! My doctor hasn't done any tests or anything. I asked her to test for intolerences and allergies as well but she insisted that only a test for a wheat allergy was necessary and wouldn't do any other ones. She's a nice doctor, she just has a set opinion of things. She's completely convinced that my eating preferences are "part of my disease" and that the only indication that I am better is that I will eat junk food and animal products. She also got my mom completely against the idea of RAW by saying that her brother joined a cult in which they were vegan and that that sort of extreme way of eating is not healthy or normal. So my mom got all freaked out and keeps telling me that the doctor doesn't want me eating like theis blah blah blah. i wish she could understand. I love her so much. Anyway, about digestive health..I've actually been eating six meals a day since last summer when I got back from an inpatient rehab place, I know theres no excuse for having lost weight again...but it wasn't something I did conciously. I still ate all my meals, it's just a ton of things were going on in my family life again and I started really feeling the depression and such once again to the point where I wasn't careful enough about eating because I just didn't care any more. I still followed my meal plan but I didn't keep track and check and all that and REALLY make sure I was getting enough calories because something in me didnt care any more. After discovering raw and getting inspired I've really come out of depression and sometimes even feel like my old self again, my self from before ED. I honestly feel completely free, sure once and a while I think "that was a LOT of fat I had today" and get a bit uneasy for a sec, but then I think about how it's good for me and my body needs it to survive and that I'm eating naturally, the way I have always wanted to, the way we were meant to...and the uneasiness goes away. Oo sorry I've gotten a bit off topic, I do have fairly poor digestion but I can handle it as I have been for so long. And my doctor has take reglon or something like that. THank you so much, do you have any good green smoothie recipes? thank you misslinda :)

Lanasq- thank you very much :). I've tried banana ice cream...yum!

Nenyath- thank you! your words mean a lot to me :)

Rawtruth- Thank you! And thanks for the info on protein and soaking of pumpkin seeds. I suppose the body image thing is possible, but I mean theres a difference. Like it physically feels weighted down. But I know what you mean, and it's possible. If that is so I hope to get past it. I do not want a negative body image. Strangely I never had one before, not until after I became a low weight :(. I was always very thin and naturally quite toned, and it's hard because now I feel I wont be

[misslinda]

Hey Lunar, How has things been since your birthday? Family a little less tense since all the good dessert? :D Here are a couple of links to various simple eating recipes and the second is green smoothie recipes.

http://www.rawfoodtalk.com/forum/showthread.php?t=11284
http://www.rawfoodtalk.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2390&highlight=green+smoothies

:)

[Lunar*Fey]

thanks Misslinda! My mom hasn't changed her mind about raw food, still thinks its some obsession, etc. *sighs* maybe once Alissa's book and DVD get here...*hopes*
thanks again :)

[Elouet]

Dear Lunar,
First, I am so proud of you and happy for you! I'm struggling with an eating disorder also, and I know how difficult the weight gain is, some days it's easy and you're happy with yourself and other days it's unbearable. Your mom should be proud! Secondly, I believe that God does everything for a reason and (not to sound creepy but) I think we were supposed to meet. My mom feels the exact same way about my raw food diet, she thinks it's a food obcession! I want to buy Alissa's DVD and book also, because I think she's a great example of health. I think we can both beat our issues with weight and take control of our lives again, and I think that we can show others that raw isn't an "obcession" or a "sickness" but the healthiest way of living! Congratulations, you are very brave.

[heabrook]

Dear Lunar*fey,

I hope all is well with you! I am sure you are excited to be getting Alissa's book and DVD in the mail soon.

I'm glad that you gained two lbs, but I am also sorry that you are being forced into eating what you don't want to eat (the SAD).

Just out of curiosity, how much do you weigh and what is your height? Personally, I don't buy into the BMI and weight to height ratio. According to the BMI chart, I am underweight. However, I feel that my weight is perfect for my body type (small, very petite). If you are petite as well, then you may very well need to have less weight on you to be healthy for your body type. Oh well.. doctors want to put everything and everyone into a group so that everyone is the same. To say that everyone who is a certain height should be this certain weight is just absurd. Everyone is different.

Best wishes to you.. be strong and know that when you are old enough, you can make your own choices and do what is right for you (which you should be allowed to do now......)

heather

[Lunar*Fey]

Elouet- Thank you :). Maybe, somehow, we can help eachother :). My mom doesn't seem to be proud at all, quite the opposite...maybe once I've gained a few more pounds? I keep waiting and hoping for her to be proud of me...I just don't think it'll happen too soon though. I gain two pounds and she seems to say "it could have been five if you ate normal". I would definately agree that we were supposed to meet! I don't really believe in coincidence. I so agree with you! In fact, if you are willing, lets do this together!

Heather- I got the book and DVD!! I read the entire book cover to cover the first day I got it! I was/am so excited! I haven't been able to watch the DVD yet, but am quite anxious to!

Actually, the past couple days I've been eating all raw. It's hard without the support and approval of my mom. That whole "ok I have mom's approval, now I can go do stuff on my own and be a teenager and all that" stage was sort of taken away from me...but that's a whole different story. Anyway, I also have a problem with the BMI chart, I think it's ridiculus to categorize people that way...like you say everyone is different. I feel that getting my period back will be an indicator of my health, I am definately not following the BMI chart although my doctor is. I am 5 feet 4 inches tall and I weigh about 82 pounds last I knew. Before the whole weight loss issues began I was about 5'3 and 95 pounds. My doctor says at 5'4 I should be well over 100 pounds. Ok, maybe I should. I don't really know. But I do know that I am almost exactly like my mom in looks and build and such, and she was like 5'9 and probably like 120-130 pounds in high school. Not that that necessarily means that's how I should be...But I've seen pictures of my mom and she was always realllly thin.
Any way, thank you so much :). I really want to be on my own, simply so that I will be able to provide for myself and make my own decisions. Otherwise, I'd rather stay young.