Hello and help! from a vegan Londoner!

[CorporalChicken]

Hi everyone :-)

I am vegan, and have been so for quite some time.

The last year/two years have put me under serious stress and I have neglected pretty much every aspect of my physical being!

I have put on 2-3 dress sizes, and it shows on my hips, backside and thighs. Prior to this time, I was always slim, full of energy and happy in myself.

So.. I've decided to start a raw food diet to help me out of this horrible state! I'm starting slowly, with raw fruit/veg BUT with lightly grilled tofu.

I would love to know how many of you deal with overbearing parents and family? I have a mother-in-law who loves to cook and add large quantities of salt and sugar to every meal! Help!

[heabrook]

Welcome to the forum!

Most of us have to deal with people who do not accept our diet. The difference is, most of us don't care :D

You can't let others run your life. You are the only person who can choose what you consume. If you want to go on and all raw diet (which is GREAT) then do it. Tell your mother-in-law that you have decided to take charge of your life and become healthier. If she doesn't want to make raw dishes, then tell her that you will make them and bring them to dinner whenever you eat together.

Please... I strongly urge you to NOT let others influence your decisions, especially on your diet. If going raw is important to you, then people who love and care for you should respect that.

My inlaws don't respect our diet either. However, that does not in any way influence how we choose to eat. We still eat the way they do, they just don't like it.

I recently posted a thread about it.. you might find everyone's advice helpful and it also seems to apply to your situation.
http://www.rawfoodtalk.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12536

[CorporalChicken]

Hello heabrook and thank you for the welcome!

Found the ext. thread very interesting!

I think it's a case that I know my MIL is always acting out the kindness of her heart, but she makes me feel pressured. She's pressured me before to eat honey, to try egg, to eat the same dinner as my vegetarian boyfriend. I always politely say no, but sometimes it drives me crazy as being a bit impatient lately, I hate repeating myself! It makes it worse that as far as MILs go, she's really quite accommodating with my vegan diet than I imagine most MIL would be! I feel bad having to say 'No!'.

To tell the truth, if I have to start making my own lunches and dinners by eating beforehand or taking a packed lunch, she might not get a chance to challenge me or worry about having to make a seperate meal!

[heabrook]

You shouldn't feel bad for saying no. She shouldn't constantly keeping asking you! If I were you, I would confront her (nicely, of course) and tell her that this IS your diet and you will not wake up suddenly one morning and want the food that she eats. Ask her to please stop offering, while you appreciate her thoughtfulness, you do not eat that way.

For example... "Thank you for offering your food to me. However, I enjoy eating the way that I do. I do not desire the food that you eat. Please, respect me and stop asking me if I want to eat non-vegan food. That is not how I choose to live my life. The way I eat isn't something that will change overnight."

It would irritate the daylights out of me if someone kept doing that! I would go crazy... stick up for yourself, you have that right. There needs to be better communication in that relationship. It sounds like she is a nice person, but honestly... she keeps asking you because she thinks that the pressure will get to you. You should stand your ground.

Do not be ashamed of the way you eat. I have learned that lesson a long time ago. I will not be ashamed or let people walk over me because of my lifestyle. I'm always polite, but I will not suffer in silence by the words and actions of others.