View Full Version : What was YOUR inspiration for today?
03-30-2006, 05:14 PM
Hi, although it gets easier the longer I am Raw, today I was enforced with the memories of the person I WAS. I walk around with a very slim body now & I walk around very obese women. I see what they are going through. My heart just breaks while I'm passing by. I know those defending looks & keeping your head down or the defeated look as you grab something boxed you KNOW isnt helping you & today as I passed that woman a little voice inside me said "Stop hurting you're not that person anymore." I defended that thought with No I AM that woman. I know TOO much of what she is feeling to NOT be her.
Maybe I'm having a tough time with this drastic change. I dont know, but I'm just so happy that I wish I could bottle it & give every obese woman a good dose.
What got YOU through your day??
lil fairy z girl
03-30-2006, 05:22 PM
i kept thinking about the weight i have lost, my jeans are so loose. i thought that i finally feel happier with my body. i dont see the ugly body of my mother anymore, i am not her, i am different i am me and i am free of her and my family, and it is good.
sorry if my thoughts are too deep.
03-30-2006, 05:31 PM
I dont think your thoughts are too deep & you might be surprised by how many ppl would feel that they relate.
03-30-2006, 06:12 PM
sal, I completely identify with you. Lately I've been seeing my mother in the mirror. It has been alarming and an impetus to seriously change. I can't and won't go that way. . . ill health, doctors, prescription drug nightmares -- and still choosing to eat garbage at 78. I cry with gratitude for learning a better way to go.
ljannise, I haven't told you before but you are my inspiration. With over 100 lb to lose, you give me such hope.
03-30-2006, 07:09 PM
that makes me feel really good, thank you
03-30-2006, 07:21 PM
I woke up this morning with no headache, no eyes stuck together, no stuffy nose, no runny ears, I got out of bed with no backache and no leg pain, I laid there, and thought about the coming day, and all the fun things I was going to do, no rush to the bathroom, before I couldn't hold it any long, no urgency to urinate.
I got in the shower and enjoyed the hot water, not because I had aches and pains, but because I was enjoying the water.
I wasn't starving for wheat and dairy, my breakfast of fresh ripe pineapple sat there for several minutes maybe even an hour before I even started eating it.
I enjoyed my day, NOT thinking about food, but enjoying food.
I made some corn chips and burgers and strawberry shortcake, and just nibbled a little, I didn't feel a "need" to devour everything in sight.
All of these things have been so foreign to me.
I enjoy my food now, it's not a crutch or a desperate "need."
I enjoy my body, it doesn't cause me pain and anguish every day, I enjoy my life now.
As far as I'm concerned Raw food is Magic.
03-30-2006, 11:12 PM
I just left my boyfriend of seven years who was quietly tolerant of my weight gain. I went from 128 to 198 over the past few years. I knew it bothered him because he started to seem less interested in me. He did not really say anything so I would ask him what was wrong. Finally, he said it was my weight. After being dumped by 3 different men because of weight gain (I was thin when meeting and then gained in all situations), I simply did not care and did not do anything about it on purpose so he would get to love me for me and not the way I looked. It's been two years later, and I know he loved me, but he started to reveal who he really was by treating me disrespectfully and spending less time with me. I decided to leave and am back to my happy self before I met him. He has been calling back often and even wanting to live together.
I said no and wrote him a letter why. He wrote back that I had no respect for myself because of my weight.
I let it go in one ear and out the other without letting it bother me. I always get thin again although I have never even come close to being this heavy.
I will always know what it is like to be obese. People treat you differently, with less respect and like you are stupid. They also don't notice you as much. It was just a few years ago when I was so fit that an ex boyfriend said I looked like a playboy model. You never know, I may get that way again and look forward to giving special attention to to overweight people knowing what they have been through and who they really are is in their heads and not what their body looks like. I always knew this but now I REALLY know.
I am glad I am this overweight because now I know how much people really need to go out of their way to make sure everyone feels special.
I am looking forward to dating again and even had a gentleman come up to me and say I looked wonderful (just a few weeks ago, while I am 186 lb's). He passed the "interested even though I am obese test"
Keep your chin up and take care of yourself the best that you can and find people to spend time with that will look you in the eye, smile and talk with you the same as they would with anyone else.
03-30-2006, 11:21 PM
I want you come all the way down to 112 and than with all the knowlede that you have learn from being 185 come full circle and never let shallow people into your life again.
03-30-2006, 11:42 PM
Your words really touched me deep and I admire your ability to step outside youself and share the intimacy of it all ;)
Deep topic......got me right where it counts :o
I have a real tough time with this. Ironically, I've been in psychotherapy and my sessions are almost dead quiet b/c I do not know how to speak with my true feelings. I cancelled my appt this week and I know next week I will do the same. LOL...how do I get by??? Right now, I dunno........let me think about this some more :confused:
03-31-2006, 12:04 AM
Your description of your day and the lack of power that food has upon you sounds like what happened to me on raw. I finally feel like food does not really matter to me anymore, and it is just for nourishing your boy when it wants it and nothing more. That is the way I like it too.
I just went to the NHF store today (The Wedge), and went to the special counter where they answer questions for you. I asked if they could special order Alissa's book for me because I want to save shipping. The guy said "Oh, you are into eating raw? And I said, yes, I am so glad I discovered it, I cured all sorts of things on it. He said he has been raw for 5 years. We just smiled at each other like we had some great discovery that no one knows about.
I like that commaderie between raw food people. It's kind of special.
03-31-2006, 11:16 AM
THis is a complicated subject, and one I can relate to from both sides of the fence.
In defense of people who are not attracted to an obese or overweight person (which I've been for the past 10 years):
Being fat is not healthy. It's an indication of an addictive disorder. It's an indication of being out of balance physically, emotionally and spiritually. Is it discrimination to not want to be intimately involved with a person who is struggling with an addiction and out of balance and maybe not doing anything about it? It's not discrimination when people are not attracted to drug addicts, sex addicts, gambling addicts-in fact, your mother will tell you to avoid such a potential partner-wouldn't she?
So why is it "discrimination" to not be attracted to a fat, unhealthy person???
Political correctness is not helpful to anyone. Love we deserve, attraction we earn. Healthy is attractive. The love an unhealthy person needs the most is from themselves-then the love from others follows...I can speak from experience having been 40 pounds overweight for the last 10 years....
03-31-2006, 11:42 AM
I hope noone thought I was discriminating?!
What gets ME through the day is absolute utter FAITH. I know when i am in a funk IT WILL pass and when i feel great to enjoy the heck out of those moments.
I have been 100% raw since 2-25-06...but in OA for yrs. and have not had weight problems for a while.THANK GOD
( i have been 174 and down to 102lbs. currently 112ish but feel i look much bigger..)
Anyways--all i know is MY solution is to be very introspective and see my part in things and live life the best i can. I have spent MANY yrs letting others define me--i enjoy my 30's b/c i do not do it half as much now and when i do , I know how stop the mental thought train.
RAW to me is not so much about the weight--at this time-- but more about CLARITY i get/seek when I meditate and RAW helps that a lot.
Not sure if i answered the ? but this is what came out:)
03-31-2006, 04:17 PM
How can you be discrminating Lijannise? :confused:
Okay I've been pondering all this and JMD woke up my senses.........
I believe my [inspiration] is the SUN. I wake up every morning eager and in anticipation to [see] it,[watch] and [feel] it. It is here that I find comfort,divinity and inspiration to try and make it thru the day.......
I know it wil alwasy be here when I awake and no matter which direction I turn, the sun's rays touch me.
03-31-2006, 11:03 PM
ljannise, what a beautiful thread,
I love that you started it.
I woke up this morning wanting to get out of bed and start my day, when I ate cooked, I never wanted to get out of bed, I HAD to.
That is my difference, my motivation, the way I "feel" physically and emotionally.
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